FIRE friends & family

Triumph13

I wish there was a way I could say 'thank you for your service' without sounding like an American, but there isn't so I won't.

MarkCarnage

Sea_Shell wrote: »

"You're lucky" is something that I've heard alot!! (DH had stopped work a few years before me, and I was part time.)

Yes, you could argue that we're "lucky" in the sense that we've not had any major life events interrupt our plans...but to suggest it's just down to "luck" is wrong.

It's like saying to a slim person "you're lucky, you don't need to watch what you eat", when it's because you DO watch what you eat, that you're slim!!

Gary Player..."the more I work and practice, the luckier I get".....when asked about a 'lucky' shot....substitute save and plan for practice and you have it....

Pollycat

Silvertabby wrote: »

No, it was the money. But you're right - we both consider ourselves extremely lucky to have completed our service with our lives, limbs and minds intact. Unlike so many others.

A very dignified reply to a pretty crass post. :T

Audaxer

Sea_Shell wrote: »

We have NOT told our family yet. DH's family would just worry, and mine would be the "spongers", for both our time and our money.

So selfishly, we've decided to enjoy this period of time FOR US, until the cat's out of the bag, that is!!

When your family and friends eventually find out that you have been retired for some time, hopefully they will not be annoyed that you hadn't told them about it. While I wouldn't go into our finance details or discuss investments with friends or family, I just tell them I got the opportunity to take early retirement which was too good to turn down, and they seem to accept that.

Sea_Shell

Audaxer wrote: »

When your family and friends eventually find out that you have been retired for some time, hopefully they will not be annoyed that you hadn't told them about it. While I wouldn't go into our finance details or discuss investments with friends or family, I just tell them I got the opportunity to take early retirement which was too good to turn down, and they seem to accept that.

Why should they be annoyed or upset? What difference should it make to them whether I'm at work or not? UNLESS, they realise that I could have been available for THEM, during this time...which proves my point!!!

Pollycat

Sea_Shell wrote: »

Why should they be annoyed or upset? What difference should it make to them whether I'm at work or not? UNLESS, they realise that I could have been available for THEM, during this time...which proves my point!!!

I'm just gob-smacked that anybody thinks it's any business of anyone else if they have retired early and can or can't afford it.
Which is why I thought the OP's points about what his ex colleagues might think were 'odd'.

Do so many people live in each other's pockets?

TBC15

Just tell people you are out of work.

Anonymous101

Pollycat wrote: »

I'm just gob-smacked that anybody thinks it's any business of anyone else if they have retired early and can or can't afford it.
Which is why I thought the OP's points about what his ex colleagues might think were 'odd'.

Do so many people live in each other's pockets?

I understand that with some friends and I obviously don't know about other peoples personal situations are regarding family relationships etc I wouldn't for a second say that people are wrong not to tell people personal things. That is very much their prerogative.


However I would think that it is natural for people that care about each other particularly those closest to us, parents, siblings, children etc to be interested in our wellbeing. If I suddenly told my family that I wasn't working anymore without the context of financial independence I would expect them to be concerned and ask about the circumstances. I also understand that some members of families also have selfish agendas and would try to hijack others time and money. So I would be very careful about what I tell who. Its sometimes a lot easier to be a little economical with how much of a story you tell and if you wish to say that you're still working then that's fair enough for me... its not untrue for anyone that's F.I. to say that they are a "asset manager" we all are aren't we?!?

Pollycat

Anonymous101 wrote: »

I understand that with some friends and I obviously don't know about other peoples personal situations are regarding family relationships etc I wouldn't for a second say that people are wrong not to tell people personal things. That is very much their prerogative.

I found the OP's comments about his colleagues 'odd' because in the same circumstances, I wouldn't give a moment's thought about anyone else's financial affairs.
It's none of my business.
I've got more important things to think about and I'd be surprised if the OP's colleagues are that bothered about whether he has enough money to buy next week's groceries.

I told friends that I was taking early retirement.
I wasn't ashamed of that.
I wasn't proud of that.
It was simply a fact.

Anonymous101 wrote: »

However I would think that it is natural for people that care about each other particularly those closest to us, parents, siblings, children etc to be interested in our wellbeing. If I suddenly told my family that I wasn't working anymore without the context of financial independence I would expect them to be concerned and ask about the circumstances. I also understand that some members of families also have selfish agendas and would try to hijack others time and money. So I would be very careful about what I tell who. Its sometimes a lot easier to be a little economical with how much of a story you tell and if you wish to say that you're still working then that's fair enough for me... its not untrue for anyone that's F.I. to say that they are a "asset manager" we all are aren't we?!?

You are aware I'm speaking from my own personal perspective...?
My family are not 'expecters'.
They know me, they know my husband and trust any financial decision we make to be a sound one.
And if it's not, it's down to us.

Sea_Shell

Mine are definitely "expectors" !!! They've got form!