Friend died, exwife taking everything from new partner need advice

74jax

kazwookie wrote: »

How does the wife get in to take the items?


I suggest the girl friend moves all her stuff in to one room, and dependent on the lease etc, changes the door locks for now, and starts looking for a new home.
(not enough information)

I don't think the girlfriend rented the house with him, she might have stayed there but I think it was his. The girlfriend and he were moving in together to a house next week.

74jax

ska_lover wrote: »

I am so sorry for your friend, OP.


The ex wife sounds a right witch

I really feel for the girlfriend too but the wife is not a witch. The husband chose to leave his estate to his wife.

You can't just do what you want and decide who gets what. You need legal documentation to draw up a deed of variation which comes with a whole heap of problems around deprecation of asset questions etc.

Unfortunately he died leaving it to his wife.

Pollycat

This is the second thread in recent weeks that refers to an ex-wife when there has been no divorce:

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6049888/personal-injury-compensation-and-divorce&highlight=wife


I'm at a loss to understand what people expect to happen when they die without leaving a will and are still legally married to someone else. :huh:

ska_lover

74jax wrote: »

I really feel for the girlfriend too but the wife is not a witch. The husband chose to leave his estate to his wife.

You can't just do what you want and decide who gets what. You need legal documentation to draw up a deed of variation which comes with a whole heap of problems around deprecation of asset questions etc.

Unfortunately he died leaving it to his wife.

Yes I see this, in financial sense, I agree with all of the above

But from what OP is saying, the wife is attempting to stop his partner of ten years, from seeing the body or even attending the funeral.

That is why I called her a witch - not because of the financial stuff. In terms of the funeral etc, a human being, the wife is playing a sick game of top trumps.

It must be heartbreaking for the partner. She has been with him for a decade, and the sudden death must be awful to deal with and now she is being denied to grieve as one may expect.

It really is a lesson to anyone in that situation

It is very embittered way to act on part of the wife

unforeseen

She can stop her seeing the body but I understood that funerals were public.

However, there is possibly the likelihood of something kicking off if she attends, especially if the wife is the wronged party.

Pollycat

ska_lover wrote: »

Yes I see this, in financial sense, I agree with all of the above

But from what OP is saying, the wife is attempting to stop his partner of ten years, from seeing the body or even attending the funeral.

That is why I called her a witch - not because of the financial stuff. In terms of the funeral etc, a human being, the wife is playing a sick game of top trumps.

It must be heartbreaking for the partner. She has been with him for a decade, and the sudden death must be awful to deal with and now she is being denied to grieve as one may expect.

It really is a lesson to anyone in that situation

It is very embittered way to act on part of the wife

I agree with this but we don't know the details.
Maybe the OP's friend had an affair with the girlfriend whilst still married and there is still some rancour on the part of the (not ex) wife.
Still not nice but it seems to me that it's not the behaviour of someone who's been estranged from a husband for 10 years and has moved on.

unholyangel

Barneysmom wrote: »

Thank you.
They were legally separated but not divorced, the flat's rented but all the furniture etc would have been bought by both of them, certainly no contribution from his ex-wife.
A lesson to all then - get married or lose a lot.

I think her biggest fear is not being allowed to the funeral but I always thought that funerals were for anyone who wants to pay their respects.

When you say legally separated, do you mean they lived apart or that they had actually went through the motions required for a legal separation?

There are cases of courts awarding sums to partners over spouses where they've been in a long term relationship with the partner. But it can be very costly to fight.

ska_lover

Pollycat wrote: »

I agree with this but we don't know the details.
Maybe the OP's friend had an affair with the girlfriend whilst still married and there is still some rancour on the part of the (not ex) wife.
Still not nice but it seems to me that it's not the behaviour of someone who's been estranged from a husband for 10 years and has moved on.

Oh! I hadn't thought of that Pollycat. D'oh.

Gosh yes I agree - it definitely is not the behaviour of a person who has moved on.

What an awful situation

I hope the OP comes back and lets us know what happens (in the present situation) / was agreed on - I think it might be informative to some

74jax

ska_lover wrote: »

Yes I see this, in financial sense, I agree with all of the above

But from what OP is saying, the wife is attempting to stop his partner of ten years, from seeing the body or even attending the funeral.

That is why I called her a witch - not because of the financial stuff. In terms of the funeral etc, a human being, the wife is playing a sick game of top trumps.

It must be heartbreaking for the partner. She has been with him for a decade, and the sudden death must be awful to deal with and now she is being denied to grieve as one may expect.

It really is a lesson to anyone in that situation

It is very embittered way to act on part of the wife

I think the op has been changed but I can't find the first version. I'm sure I read it differently. - but it might have been my error of course and I just read it wrong.... :cool: I just think there's so much more than is being told. Yes they were seeing each other for 10 years but only moving in together next week, was there a reason, did they see each other once a week, once a month. Etc. No one really knows.

When did the legal separation happen.... The solicitor would have advised them to make a will, sign girlfriend as nok. But he chose not too.... Why?

Was a financial agreement in place at separation, or was it still to be sorted at divorce. Did the wife own any of the husband stuff when they split. Too much guessing too know.

Pollycat

74jax wrote: »

I think the op has been changed but I can't find the first version. I'm sure I read it differently. - but it might have been my error of course and I just read it wrong.... :cool: I just think there's so much more than is being told. Yes they were seeing each other for 10 years but only moving in together next week, was there a reason, did they see each other once a week, once a month. Etc. No one really knows.

When did the legal separation happen.... The solicitor would have advised them to make a will, sign girlfriend as nok. But he chose not too.... Why?

Was a financial agreement in place at separation, or was it still to be sorted at divorce. Did the wife own any of the husband stuff when they split. Too much guessing too know.

And of course we're not getting any of the story first hand as it's through the OP who was a friend of the deceased.