Toddler tantrums

pinkshoes

I am doing calm today!

I took them all to a tennis court. DS2 didn't like the new place so would not cooperate, and just stood on the court demanding "mummy cuddle", so I alternated between holding his hand and carrying him whilst played tennis with DS1!! DD was happy to be ball girl.

We managed to have fun!

We then did shoe shop (queue DS2 and his repetitive questions about where we are going and why). He did eventually agree to have his feet measured despite refusing to communicate with the lady, and we have new shoes!! (He can be VERY particular about shoes).

It is nearly 2pm and only 3 meltdowns today!! Woo hoo! He got himself so worked up about wrong type of spoon at breakfast he puked on himself and still smells of puke! Puke smell vs battle of getting him to agree to change. hmmmm....

I had bottom set Y9 class with 28 kids last year. One girl called me all sorts of names when I sent her out most lessons. I'm a bit like the penguins in Madagascar "smile and wave boys" then just get on with the lesson without reacting.

onwards&upwards

Do you notice that he struggles to sit still? Does he still have the bendiness/mannerisms of a baby or struggle with coordination?

pinkshoes

onwards&upwards wrote: »

Do you notice that he struggles to sit still? Does he still have the bendiness/mannerisms of a baby or struggle with coordination?

He is very wriggly.

Even at bed time he is fidgeting during his story. We then do songs, but he is sitting up, lying down, up again, making random comments about random things, usually very obscure details he has noticed or remembered, then arranging his duvet and teddies or whatever other random object he insists on sleeping with.

He often flings himself backwards as we end up getting head-butted.

His coordination seems fine and he seems quite bright although refuses to follow any instructions and hates being told what to do!

Mojisola

pinkshoes wrote: »

His coordination seems fine and he seems quite bright although refuses to follow any instructions and hates being told what to do!

For this small part of the issue, follow the advice I think someone posted previously to give him a choice of two or three things so that he feels in control.

Even if you can just make small changes so that he's more settled, it will make your life easier while you wait for a referral.

Beans27

Wow this thread is a revelation, I thought I was the only one! Pinkshoes my boy was 3 in April and sounds like he has a lot of similar issues. Feels like he tantrums constantly over the smallest thing and is definitely 'challenging', someone said about not wanting to go down particular roads, we have that all the time when we are out, good to know we are not alone and others have got through it!


He seems to have sensory issues as well (at the moment he'll only wear long sleeved top - that was great in the 30 degree heat), apparently my partner was the same when he was small and I've always suspected he's somewhere on the autism spectrum.


Mine is an only child, and his speech is poor which doesn't help. We have been seeing a speech and language therapist, I'm hoping once he starts nursery full time in September, this will bring him on and hopefully calm him down.


No advice really, hope it helps to know you are not alone, and seems to be a lot of good tips in this thread :beer:

puppypants

He's a "threenager" it is what threenagers do...xx

Blackpool_Saver

The more I read the more I see the spectrum behaviours which my son had at this age. He is now fully diagnosed with Autism, he was originally diagnosed 'just' ADHD. The food not touching, the routines, the routes having to be the same. The has to be Now, the odd sense of time, it's all there....

pollypenny

puppypants wrote: »

He's a "threenager" it is what threenagers do...xx

Blackpool_Saver wrote: »

The more I read the more I see the spectrum behaviours which my son had at this age. He is now fully diagnosed with Autism, he was originally diagnosed 'just' ADHD. The food not touching, the routines, the routes having to be the same. The has to be Now, the odd sense of time, it's all there....

I'd be reluctant to medicalise a behaviour which is not unusual in toddlers.

puppypants has it right. Give the little one time, enough though it's hard.

bouicca21

Tantrums are not unusual. The behaviour Pinkshoes describes is more than normal toddler behaviour. I think like Blackpool Saver the health visitor suspects autism. So do I.

A referral would confirm one way or another. Then Pinkshoes would be able to develop the kind of coping strategies she needs and maybe get the odd period of respite which she also needs.

pollypenny

I still think it is toddler tantrums. GDS 2 was frustrated when someone couldn't understand what he was saying.

Pink shoes will have know pupils who have been medicalised, possibly unnecessarily. Give him time.