Protection for elderly mother

Saratoga241

My mother has dementia and it has recently come to my attention, after months of suspicious happenings, that a neighbour of hers may be taking money from her. The way she us doing it is taking my mum to the cashpoint/bank and getting her to draw money out for her, getting my mum to purchase food and other items for her. I have third party access to my mum's bank account and I can see that this is happening. I have spoken to the bank and the police and they both say that until we can prove that there has been a crime committed (I.e my mum isn't willingly giving her the money and items), there is nothing which they can do. The neighbour in question is also using the approach of trying to isolate my mum from her family, so that we can't keep a close eye on what is going on. I am now at a loss as to what to do about this very concerning situation, so any advice would be gratefully received. One point I need to mention is that I own my mum's house, so I'm wondering if there is any way I can keep this neighbour out by stating that I do not want her in my property?

McKneff

And who will care for youtpr mother.
Can you afford to move her into sheltered appropriate sheltered housing.
Or have her live with you

elsien

Raise a safeguarding concern with the local authority.

Is your mum's dementia now affecting her financial capacity? Does she know what is happening but think it's worth it for the friendship or wants to do it to help out? What does she say when you ask her about it from her perspective? Are we talking a few packets of biscuits or a bottle of premium cognac every day?

Is there a financial power of attorney in place?
And from a practical level, a)there is no way of keeping people out unless you are there 24/7 and b) that's just going to blow your relationship with your mother right out of the water.

You have to talk to your mother about what she thinks of the situation.

Saratoga241

This isn't pretty stuff. We are talking thousands of pounds. I think the methodology is for the woman to plead destitution and my mum 'loans' her the money/buys a week worth of shopping. My mum can't remember doing it the next day because of her memory. I tried to get power of attorney and found a nice sheltered accommodation close to where I live, but the neighbour managed to talk my mum out of both. It is all very controlling.

Pollycat

Have you involved the Adult Care section of your local council?


It sounds like this neighbour is there all he time drip-feeding stuff into your Mum's ear.
How often do you see your Mum?

Mojisola

Saratoga241 wrote: »

This isn't pretty stuff. We are talking thousands of pounds.

My mum can't remember doing it the next day because of her memory.

I tried to get power of attorney and found a nice sheltered accommodation close to where I live, but the neighbour managed to talk my mum out of both. It is all very controlling.

elsien wrote: »

Raise a safeguarding concern with the local authority.

It sounds as if you'll have to make this official.

Are there any family members who could live with your mother for a while or take it in turns to live with her. The longer you leave this, the more control the neighbour will have over her.

Saratoga241

When I first started noticing the £1000 transactions on the bank statements, I approached the woman and threatened to go to the police. She initially paid back £1000, but it has happened several times again since then.

Saratoga241

My mum has no family apart from myself and my sister, who lives away. My mum only has a 1 bed flat, so I couldn't stay there and my mum is very keen to stay in her own flat. I am thinking of having security cameras installed in her flat, but I'm not sure that this would prevent what is happening.

Mojisola

Saratoga241 wrote: »

When I first started noticing the £1000 transactions on the bank statements, I approached the woman and threatened to go to the police. She initially paid back £1000, but it has happened several times again since then.

And will continue if you don't do something about it.

Saratoga241

I know Mojisola, but I keep coming up against brick walls. I thought the bank or the police would at least be able to help in some way. It's amazing what people can get away with where vulnerable people are concerned.

Skibunny40

Can't remember the proper phrase, but can you apply to the courts to get Power of Attorney since your mum no longer has capacity? Would Social Services be able to help?

Sorry if I missed it, but did you answer the questions about how close you live and how often you visit?