Splitting from husband, need help with my escape plan

lulu_92

We were together for eight years, and got married in August. Obviously I didn't think I'd be leaving him less than a year later, but what's done is done. A lot of forumites have questioned our relationship over the years, and little did I know how right they were.

I have a lot of ties to him, some of which mean we are having to live under the same roof for an extended period of time. As you can imagine this is not a civil environment and not one I am happy to have my kids around, so I am formulating my escape.

We bought a new build in October, using the Help to Buy scheme. My ex has told me the rules from our developer, Bellway, state we cannot sell the house for two years. So far I cannot find anything to back this up, but ex keeps making comments that lead me to believe he does not want to sell. (He already has refused to give me 50% of the equity of any sale we make - it is a joint mortgage, might I add)

Some other info:

The house costs pretty much our entire salaries, so neither of us can afford to live here alone, or contribute to this house and live elsewhere. At the moment either of us living with parents is not an option (although a potential option for me in the future).

We have twins, who will be going to school in September. At the moment I work days, but have the flexibility to work from home as much or as little as I like (at the moment I am working at my base as much as I can, as you can imagine). Ex works nights.

This has become quite a word salad, but my emotions are all over the place, and I feel quite alone. I want to get myself and the kids out of this house and start fresh. I have the means to support us, once this house is sold, I just need to begin sorting out some money and things to help with the eventual move.

Is there any way I can force a sale, and is there any restrictions on divorce due to the short marriage time?

Thank you in advance!

lulu_92

xpc wrote: »

Personally, I would not move in with your parents, it could be difficult with the kids (I'm assuming you would want to take them), and could potentially put you in a slightly worse position regarding the house.

Thank you for your advice, it is greatly appreciated.

I don't want to move in with them if I can help it. The kids don't settle there that well, and I also don't want to impose upon their lives. As much as they love us, it would be a horrible situation to put upon them.

krlyr

lulu_92 wrote: »

(He already has refused to give me 50% of the equity of any sale we make - it is a joint mortgage, might I add)

Joint mortgage is not what indicates ownership - it's the type of/who's registered as owner on with the HM Land Registry. If you're both registered as joint tenants then you are entitled to 50% - but also liable for 50%. If you're tenants in common then there would be an agreed figure/percent split that you would be entitled to/liable for. If you're not registered as an owner then it gets a bit more complicated..

Candyapple

I remember your previous threads, so glad you are finally seeing what everyone else was seeing about your husband.

That aside, do you have the paperwork for your mortgage? Everything from the bank / solicitors / developer / any deed of trust you have? Are there any restrictive covenants in there mentioning this 2 year rule? Gather all of that together and start to go through it. Speak to a solicitor (most places do half an hour for free) to get some advice on your next steps to take. You can force a sale, but it will be costly, and you need to know whether it would be the right thing to do in your situation. You need to speak to a solicitor ASAP who can advise you far better than anyone on here can regarding your financial situation.

How are things between you both? Amicable? Hostile? Does he agree that the marriage is over and you are both now just sorting out the financials?

What are house prices like in your area currently?

Given you’ve only been in the property for 9 months, how much would you stand to lose if you were to sell now?

lulu_92

krlyr wrote: »

Joint mortgage is not what indicates ownership - it's the type of/who's registered as owner on with the HM Land Registry. If you're both registered as joint tenants then you are entitled to 50% - but also liable for 50%. If you're tenants in common then there would be an agreed figure/percent split that you would be entitled to/liable for. If you're not registered as an owner then it gets a bit more complicated..

We did everything 50/50, I will check on the paperwork but I think it is joint ownership.

chesky

Why don't you contact Bellway directly to see what their T & C are with regard to selling. Don't tell your husband, as it will just be a guide to his honesty.

shiny76

lulu_92 wrote: »

This has become quite a word salad, but my emotions are all over the place, and I feel quite alone. I want to get myself and the kids out of this house and start fresh.

I appreciate that your main concern is the house situation but don't neglect your emotional well-being.

Don't be afraid to seek help from friends/family/GP if needed!

lozzy81

Hi,
could he be referring to perhaps a 2 year fixed mortgage deal with the bank or building society?

Mayve he doesnt want to pay the % for leaving early? Apart from that I have never heard of any 2 year rule where you cant sell!

onwards&upwards

It really sounds like you need a solicitor on your side.

Stoke

Solicitor is a must in this. I tried the pleasantries route with my ex girlfriend (not even my wife) and found the whole thing got very very nasty and surprisingly quick as well. Not fun. So unless they're particularly generous your opinion will worthless to them at this point. They're always right (in their own head).

Get a solicitor involved and it will become a lot clearer and the process will probably be a whole lot less stressful.

As for forcing a sale, obviously you both need your affairs in order and you've said neither of you can afford the house alone..... realistically your only option is to push through with that.