GF paying towards mortgage, need advice

AdrianC

onwards&upwards wrote: »

A mortgage is not just a payment for a roof over your head, it’s an investment in an asset.

No, it's repaying the money you borrowed in order to make that heavily leveraged investment.

Saying the investment is the repayment is akin to saying "the bank owns the house".

Moneysaving222

Wait, you are living together and she doesn’t have any money? Her boyfriend buys a house and she’s going to be quids in.

Sorry guys, but it really sucks to be you.

onwards&upwards

AdrianC wrote: »

Saying the investment is the repayment is akin to saying "the bank owns the house".

It’s not at all, it’s building equity.

onwards&upwards

Mojisola wrote: »

But neither do you own the house you're living in.

It's an issue couples have to sort out between them but, as the partner is already laying out what she wants to happen to her contribution should they split up, it's only right for him to arrange things so that his asset is protected.

I’m not suggesting she should own it, i’m saying it’s reasonable to either pay nothing towards the asset, or pay towards it and have your stake acknowledged. Paying towards it for no stake is not fair.

AdrianC

onwards&upwards wrote: »

It’s not at all, it’s building equity.

Only because you've paid some of that linked debt off.

You still own the asset, 100%, and always did from day 1.

onwards&upwards

AdrianC wrote: »

Only because you've paid some of that linked debt off.

You still own the asset, 100%, and always did from day 1.

Where did I say you didn’t?

AdrianC

onwards&upwards wrote: »

Where did I say you didn’t?

Great, so we're in agreement that the mortgage payments aren't an investment in buying the asset. Because we agree that you already did that.

onwards&upwards

AdrianC wrote: »

Great, so we're in agreement that the mortgage payments aren't an investment in buying the asset. Because we agree that you already did that.

Oh dear.

Of course a mortgage payment is an investment in an asset. Each one increases the equity you hold.

If you don’t agree with completely obvious facts there’s no point me continuing to argue it with you though, it certainly doesn’t help the OP.

jimbog

vaporub wrote: »

I am in the process of buying a house in my name only

jimbog wrote: »

I would say to the girlfriend: 'I don't feel comfortable with you spending YOUR money on MY house why not save it instead for when you get your own place'.
Always refer to it as 'my place' rather than 'our place'

FreeBear wrote: »

A not very subtle way of saying "I don't think this relationship is going to last".

Vaporub seems to have already acknowledged that. Makes no sense now to accept any payments as it would undermine his position

Halfie

Would a Deed of Trust not be useful here? I'm in a similar situation; moved into my partner's property which he put £100k down as a deposit for and lived in alone for 8 months before I moved in. We both contribute to total household costs (including mortgage and bills) and agreed that A) he shouldn't lose any part of his £100k but that it was unfair that I paid more than half towards the mortgage and bills (I earn a larger amount so happy to pay more) and potentially got nothing back if everything went wrong. We were both very happy to do this and I suggested A) as I don't want any of the money he worked hard for before me and he suggested as he doesn't want me to be homeless and penniless if the worst happens! So we have a Deed of Trust written up and will do the same for any future properties as at the moment I can't get a decent rate mortgage due to bad credit. We've both had long term relationships break down so know how horrible it can get so decided early doors to be very open and cover bases for the worst case scenario.

I think the alarm bells here OP are that your GF doesn't want to consider alternative arrangements and if you feel things are already rocky, will buying a house only make this worse?