Back Garden Fence

rosieskitt

Yeah we just suggested for half of the timber costs, my partner and his Dad were quite happy knocking it up as we were already doing the right side of our garden fence. We showed them the quote from the supplier when we proposed contributing to the cost and agreed (verbally). We also suggested for them to get a quote elsewhere if they wanted but nothing ever materialised from their side.

rach_k

When you have an informal agreement like that and you don't specify what will be paid and when, you really just need to sit back and wait patiently. If you initially said you'd be happy for them to pay a bit here and there, when they can, but then have dropped a few hints about wanting money I can understand why they might feel pressured. 2 months is not long to some people.

We had a similar situation with our neighbour. We wanted new fences so we offered to sort them out. One side didn't want to contribute so that's now our fence. The other side agreed to pay half so it's a shared fence but we said just to pay when they had it, as we didn't want to wait. It was something like 8 months before they did, but we'd not counted on having the money so it was fine.

Now there's been some bad feeling around your fence, I'd drop them a note if you can't catch them in person. Just say you're sorry if they felt pressured and that wasn't the intention. Include a copy of the fence costs, then say that if they still want it to be a shared fence, you're happy for them to pay when they can. Say that if they don't want to share it, that's also fine and you won't mention it again. Include a box of biscuits or something if you value their friendship.

rosieskitt

Ah thanks Rach, that sounds like the best idea yet. I had thought about writing a note but wasn't sure how it would be received because I didn't want to make the situation worse.

Everybody loves a biscuit though

Mr.Generous

Interesting thread with some good advice.

I will never pay for anything up front in that kind of circumstance now, its quite often a pain getting the money afterwards.

The coupe net door to me have just replaced the fence between them and the house beyond after first having agreed to split the cost.

A bit of a disagreement about parking and driving across neighbors drive to park right under their own window by the other neighbor resulted in some bad feeling. When the fence was done he asked for half the cost as agreed and they declined. I doubt they will ever speak or see eye to eye again, years of bad feeling and awkwardness over approx. £200.

rosieskitt

Yeah ours is for around the same sum, doesn't seem worth it for the years we will probably be in this house.

[Deleted User]

rosieskitt wrote: »

Yeah we just suggested for half of the timber costs, my partner and his Dad were quite happy knocking it up as we were already doing the right side of our garden fence. We showed them the quote from the supplier when we proposed contributing to the cost and agreed (verbally). We also suggested for them to get a quote elsewhere if they wanted but nothing ever materialised from their side.

So you've probably saved them money then, as not only have you paid half but if they'd got a tradesman in it would have cost more!

Giving them the benefit of the doubt, something has perhaps been misunderstood from either them or yourselves.

The dad is just being over protective hence the confrontation (sounds a bit like something my mother would do!)

I like Rach's idea, a note with a box of chocs or something to show theres no hard feelings, but make sure the note is clear, in a friendly but concise way, that if they are not going to contribute then the fence will be owned by you.

rosieskitt

Thanks guys, you've helped no end

warby68

I wouldn't have asked for a contribution to a fence of my choosing, just for their agreement to its build.

However you did and they agreed. So they are actually in the wrong for wriggling now and I wouldn't be happy about them sending or letting dad come round (assuming they knew). Time for some growing up.

For that reason, I would want to speak to them again to discourage any further hiding behind dad. If they were nice and admitted to making a mistake, I'd swallow the cost and be generous about use of the fence. If they were off with you, I'd still swallow the cost but make it clear its your fence rather than a shared one.

Zola.

You wanted the privacy
You paid for the fence

Best let it be.

We wanted the same privacy etc when we built ours and left the neighbour entirely out of it.

PS Those kids sound like WIMPS. Having their daddy round to tell you off. Children.

Senseicads

If you do the note/biscuits thing, let us know how you get on! i hate an unfinished story! :-)