Managing our finances - husband and wife

enthusiasticsaver

SHAKERMAKER wrote: »

Hoping for some input here.

Husband and I are overhauling our finances. We just aren't sure of the best way of managing our incomings and outgoings.

We currently have 2 joint accounts: my wages paid into one account (just over £1k), and his paid into the other (£2.5k-£2.9k) monthly.
My wages pay for food and fuel.
Everything else is from his wage.

We want to have 'separate' money. We can't buy each other presents (Christmas or Birthday) without knowing how much it cost and where from as it shows on the statements. We have no independence financially.

How do other couples manage it where two people have different earnings but want to contribute towards the home etc?

Thank you!

My husband earned a lot more than me as he worked full time and after having children I worked mostly part time and even when I went full time my income was still a lot less than him. Very early on in our marriage we had a joint account and all bills and spending and pay went into this.

As you say that meant neither of us had any personal spending money and DH was not very good at keeping within a budget so we kept the joint account with all pay going in and bills going out and paid ourselves a personal spends amount every week/month initially in cash then in later years we opened personal accounts and do standing orders for £200 each. It has varied over the years according to budget from £100 a month to £300 a month and now £200 a month. Another pension pays out next year so it will go back up to £300 a month then. We use this for buying presents for each other, clothes, haircuts, personal entertainment and hobbies. It works in that we both have our own spending money and the other does not question what we spend on and we have some privacy to buy presents for the other and DH has to keep within his £200 limit each month as no overdraft facilities.

LesU

Well, maybe we are too young to be 'old-fashioned'. 40 years ago when we were first married, we decided to have 3 accounts. One each and a joint account. All outgoings were calculated and according to each of our salaries a proportion to cover outgoings was put into the joint account each month. Some years we over-calculated costs and it was a great treat to go for a meal 'on the joint'!
This system has proved so effective that we still use it.
Computer controlled accounting has meant that we are more accurate these days, but the concept remains as was.
Both of us have our own finances and long may it stay that way. All the bills are guaranteed paid. If an unusual expenditure happens along, then we pay that in a shared way from our sole accounts.

badger09

Terry_Towelling wrote: »

.................

When one of us retired, the differential between our incomes caused us to rethink and we then 'weighted' our contributions to a certain extent. We are now both retired and paying in equally again. Works perfectly if you are in the right relationship.

Interested to learn how you managed to retire so young:cool:

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6003480/missing-money-from-account&page=2

I don't often 'track' other user's posts but have been catching up after a holiday and remembered being surprised that Terry Towelling was 'only 21'

badger09

As usual with this sort of thread, posters have offered a variety of solutions. I'm not going to add mine in detail, but we have both separate and joint finances.

IT WORKS FOR US and has done for almost 30 years.

Surely, that is what matters, not what some random person on the internet asserts is the ONLY way it should happen, otherwise the relationship is faulty/not committed/deceitful etc. As in all areas of life, one size does not fit all.

(Apologies for shouting, but I feel very strongly about this:o)

londoninvestor

badger09 wrote: »

I don't often 'track' other user's posts but have been catching up after a holiday and remembered being surprised that Terry Towelling was 'only 21'

How can that be surprising? He's been 21 for many years

Terry_Towelling

badger09 wrote: »

Interested to learn how you managed to retire so young:cool:

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6003480/missing-money-from-account&page=2

I don't often 'track' other user's posts but have been catching up after a holiday and remembered being surprised that Terry Towelling was 'only 21'

londoninvestor wrote: »

How can that be surprising? He's been 21 for many years

Sorry, should have made it clear, I'm from Uranus - I certainly speak it fluently (or 'from it', some would say). One year back home is equivalent to about 84 of your earth years.

PS Did you know there are rings around Uranus?