Issue with shared front garden

arciere

sheramber wrote: »

What is going to be 'next?

Oh you tell me :j

arciere

Just to give an update, if anyone is still interested.

I got another email, they are now planning to cut everything from the garden because, since it's closer to their flat than to ours (we live on the first floor), they feel more 'affected' by it. While that could be true, I pointed out that we never made any changes to the garden and that we both purchased the flats the way they were last year (including the front garden).

They have removed the trees because of the 'spiders', then the yellow plant because of the flies and now they want to cut a small berry bush because, according to them, since we don't eat all the berries (!), it attracts ants.

Is any of these a valid argument to do any work in the garden without our approval?

G_M

Dead dog buried under the fishpond........?

sgun

Its obvious that you aren't going to be friends so you don't need to approach this in a friendly way. Tell them firmly that nothing else should be removed from the garden unless they have your absolute written permission. Give them a plan of the plants that you would like re-instated. Tell them that they need to bear all the cost. You have bought the garden so you (jointly) own the plants.

She sounds like a nightmare and actually rather unpleasant too. She isn't just someone with a phobia which might be understandable, her husband has told you that he is filtering her offensive demands. They are bullies but you are letting them get away with it at the moment.

If they continue to remove plants then buy several extra large containers and fill with large plants. Phormium, some bamboos, fatsia japonica for a tropical effect, some trees such as birch and rowan will keep in a large container for a few years. These are then your plants and there is nothing at all they would be able to do about them. Dont tell them that you are planning this. Have them all delivered one day when they are at work. It will be a lovely surprise for them. A pricey option but if you plan it well it will look lovely and will give your garden the kerb appeal back that they have removed.

xylophone

If this garden belongs to both properties then one party should not be doing any work without the consent of the other.

Have you considered having the area attractively (permeably) paved?

https://www.rhs.org.uk/advice/profile?pid=878

arciere

sgun wrote: »

Its obvious that you aren't going to be friends so you don't need to approach this in a friendly way.

I literally told them that we can hear each other sneezing but we are unable to have a conversation in person. Every time we had a 'request' was via WhatsApp or emails, and when we did actually manage to bump into each other, whatever was agreed, changed minutes later.

I gave them three options:
1) Leave everything as it is now, no more cutting, and we both ensure that regular gardening work is done (in terms of keeping it tidy). If one does not have the time or does not want to do the work, they will need to pay someone to do it;
2) If they (or we) want to remove any plant, we need to agree what that plant should be replaced with before doing any work. So if they want to cut the banana tree, they should propose a replacement, rather than just cut it and forget.
3) We share the garden in equal parts, informally or formally, they take the one close to their flat, we take the other.

I really hope they consider option 3.

arciere

xylophone wrote: »

Have you considered having the area attractively (permeably) paved?

https://www.rhs.org.uk/advice/profile?pid=878

I have, but given that this is our first property, our finances are not exactly in good shape at the moment, so any money we manage to save, we'd rather spend them on our private garden rather than on something that we didn't want to change in the first place (at least not for now).

To be honest, giving the area and all the other houses in the neighbourhood, paving wouldn't look nice, although I am sure would be a more practical option.

Mickygg

arciere wrote: »

I have, but given that this is our first property, our finances are not exactly in good shape at the moment, so any money we manage to save, we'd rather spend them on our private garden rather than on something that we didn't want to change in the first place (at least not for now).

To be honest, giving the area and all the other houses in the neighbourhood, paving wouldn't look nice, although I am sure would be a more practical option.

You would need to consider resale. All paving would appeal to only a small amount of people. Most people like grass and colour. Unfortunately your neighbours don't.

Seeing your update that they are cutting more I know what I would do. I am tolerant.......to an extent. When people take the pee then I stop being nice and tell them how it is. From what you have said this is out of order. You both own the garden so both should agree to any plant liberation.

I would now talk to them seriously. They are talking about spiders and ants I still think this is piffle. Now is the time to be firm and tell them enough is enough and together agree a plan. If you don't then you know they are gunning for the full paving route which will be easy maintenance but not a garden (IMO).

I really do feel for you. Neighbours can be so strange it's truly amazing.

xylophone

paving wouldn't look nice,

"Hard landscaping" need not be ugly.

Examples

https://www.sureset.co.uk/commercial-paving/hard-landscaping/

https://www.landscapingnetwork.com/paving/permeable.html

And you can obtain some very attractive containers.

arciere

xylophone wrote: »

"Hard landscaping" need not be ugly.

Examples

https://www.sureset.co.uk/commercial-paving/hard-landscaping/

https://www.landscapingnetwork.com/paving/permeable.html

And you can obtain some very attractive containers.

I'm sure some of them do look quite nice, definitely much better than what we have now.
The problem I see is that, from their point of view they've done their job (that is, they removed what they didn't like), and they didn't even 'ask for our help' (this made me laugh).
So what I get from all the messages is that they don't want to spend any money on it because they've already done their part.
So, if I end up spending all the money myself to fix it, I want to make sure I don't do something that pleases them.