Selling Marital Home Ex Missing

middleclassbutpoor

It may be worth visiting the debt free boards also.

If your credit ratings is impacted through the arrangement, there may be a (less) painful way to dispose of the millstone around your neck.

You could stop all mortgage payments now and save the money. Find somewhere to rent and move. Do a voluntary termination of the mortgage by handing the keys back. You may then be able to consider bankruptcy or a debt relief order of some kind to get the shortfall wiped off.

Means you will struggle with finances for next 6 years but may give you a way out.

Im not entirely sure of the options/order in which way you are best doing things so going over to that board may offer some advice which is more certain.

You do need to sort the divorce out still but at least you are secure in a home he cannot enter etc. You can also live somewhere that is affordable and will give you some sort of a life.

TheGardener

^^ middleclassbutpoor has a point - if there is no equity, do you have any other debts? What's your credit history like?

D_M_E

Don't know much about this, but you should go for divorce and, as you hyave used a tracing agent to successfully find him then you know where he is and therefore have somewhere for the papers to be served - evidenced by you saying that other stuff has been torn up.

SusieT

Since he is being less than easy to get hold of and contact, it would seem that its a case of waiting for a divorce court (I would guess from your posts that he will hold everything up as long as possible), and hope he does not return and change the locks etc.
Since it sounds as if the mortgage company do not have his current address, and with the mortgage being in arrears so your credit record is not going to look good now, so I would stop paying it which will force them to start reposession proceedings. While you are waiting for this to happen save what you would be paying on the mortgage, declutter anything possible, start to store anything personal especially paperwork at friends or relatives houses (not friends of his obviously), and towards the time you leave the house maybe some furniture just in case he gets wind of your plan, then start looking for somewhere affordable to rent. By stopping paying the mortgage you should be able to have a deposit and one or more months rent in hand by the time you find somewhere. That will take the house out of the divorce as it will have been reposessed and you will have an end to the big struggle to get him to sign.
If he does want the house he can make arrangements with the mortgage company once you have moved out and its empty.
Not the sort of thing I would normally suggest doing, but if he really is trying to be controlling about it he can make the divorce drag out if he wants to be an idiot, and you need to look after yourself with him being so evasive.
Also pop a post on the debt free wannabe board, they are very good at finding ways to save money and balance a budget

Honeylife

Mandy278 wrote: »

Hi

I am hoping someone may be able to other some advise or has gone through a similar thing that does not include spending thousands with a solicitor.

My husband walked out of our jointly owned property never to return in 2015. I have had some contact over the years but that was mainly him stating he would never divorce me or sell the house, even though he was the one that left and run off with another women !! Anyway, I need to sell this house as I can no longer afford to live in it as he hasn't paid a penny towards it since he left nor any money for his son. (Child Maintenance find him, he leaves his job and so it goes on). Right charmer isn't he

I have been told various things over the years about how to sell the house without his agreement or him signing paperwork (which he won't). I have even thought about signing his name, desperation really. The mortgage is now in arrears and even though I have been in contact with the mortgage company they say they may start proceedings to repossess which obviously having my son to look after may well leave us homeless. I do not have any savings and every penny I earn goes on just living. However, I earn to much apparently to get any help financially.

So a tough one I know, but any ideas please. Thank you in advance.

Others have suggested stop paying mortgage and move out into private property. I disagree. The house you are in is your and your child's HOME, and the essential roof over your heads and any judge will consider that a priority when settling assets. Paying someone else's mortgage by renting privately is bizarre. Particularly when we read that private tenancies are insecure and private tenants are constantly being move on, plus rents are ridiculously high.

The way I see it is its 4 years since your husband left, when it is five years you can divorce him without his agreement, without his signature and it will be cheaper. Suggest you hang in there.

You really should seriously re-consider getting a Lodger. Even if you have to share a room with your child, £7,500pa TAX FREE is not to be sniffed at, it will ease your financial situation immediately. Give the lodger the biggest room and keep them out the living room, so you and your child have a second 'private' space. Loads of us Residential landlords here to give you advice/help with Lodgers. (Just search Lodgers) If you have a student lodger you will not loose your single person council tax discount. (I presume you are paying CT as a single person since your ex left the home!)

If you are concerned about ex-husband breaking in etc, then with the first rent payment Invest in security in your house. Locks, alarm, cctv cameras back, front and side linked to your phone. Get a house safe. As it is right now you should be regularly swopping/changing ALL your locks. If you are seriously worried about your husband breaking in, you should inform the local police that you are concerned for your safety right now.

Equity in the house may go up in a few years, and you should have a bit of savings to consider selling/moving in a calmer less frazzled manner.

macman

You can start divorce proceedings during 2020 once the 5 years are up. No point in doing so before then if he is going to contest it. What you haven’t told us is how the house is jointly owned, as joint tenants, or tenants in common. Which is it?
If it’s the former, then the house will pass to him in the event of your death, not to your son, which is presumably not what you want to happen.

lisyloo

macman wrote: »

You can start divorce proceedings during 2020 once the 5 years are up. No point in doing so before then if he is going to contest it. What you haven’t told us is how the house is jointly owned, as joint tenants, or tenants in common. Which is it?
If it’s the former, then the house will pass to him in the event of your death, not to your son, which is presumably not what you want to happen.

Isn’t desertion one of the grounds for divorce?
Is there a reason this doesn’t apply here?

LadyDee

I'm not sure about this, but in the back of my mind there's something about a Notice being placed in the London Gazette giving notice of issue of proceedings if you cannot trace him physically. Worth checking this perhaps - it might be appropriate in divorce matters?

Or maybe read through the information the legal beagle website, which might be of some help.