Owed money by "friend"

Zero_Sum

My OH has a similar situation with a 'friend'. All you get of her is lies & excuses, hasnt made any attempt to pay anything for about 3 years now.
Its highly unlikely you'll get it back unless you do go to court

LadyDee

chesky wrote: »

If he's admitted that the money is a loan and not a gift, in writing, then you could write him a 'letter before action' threatening to take him to the small claims court unless he pays you back by a certain date. Send it recorded delivery. But then, as it costs to actually do it, you may well decide it would be throwing good money after bad.

I expect you can google template letters to help you.

Actually, it's better NOT to send it recorded - he'll probably just refuse to sign for it. A letter can be posted from a PO with a receipt for postage and the letter is deemed to have been received after so many days. Just make sure you keep that proof of postage.

racquel

Had a message this morning, he has been working overtime ( managed to change profile pic on fb tho and comment on others posts) and can't pay this week but gas set up transfer for next week.
It's not like I'm wanting it all in one go, I know he has a lot to pay out, part of it a loan he got with his ex but in his name, that ends in January, Christ I'd be happy with a fiver a week, consistency is what I want.
Thanks for the advice, the letter of advice will be the next route if it carries on, not sure if it would just be a threat if the messages I have saved might not be enough to take it further.

Zero_Sum

racquel wrote: »

Had a message this morning, he has been working overtime ( managed to change profile pic on fb tho and comment on others posts) and can't pay this week but gas set up transfer for next week.
It's not like I'm wanting it all in one go, I know he has a lot to pay out, part of it a loan he got with his ex but in his name, that ends in January, Christ I'd be happy with a fiver a week, consistency is what I want.
Thanks for the advice, the letter of advice will be the next route if it carries on, not sure if it would just be a threat if the messages I have saved might not be enough to take it further.

You'll find with people like this is there will be a reason / excuse every week or month why they cant pay. Even paying a couple of quid now & then seems too difficult. In our case had she just set up a monthly £5 SO the debt would be cleared.

-taff

They have never paid consistently according to your original post.

Fireflyaway

Maybe if you write to him so he knows you will be understanding ( you do seem to come across that you are) and a low but consistent amount would be acceptable he might feel less embarrassed / defensive and keep to the agreement. I have a feeling you may have already done this though?!
I once lent £20 to a work colleague and got all the same excuses. It was only a small amount but like you say it's the fact they messed you about that's upsetting.
If being nice doesn't work then I'm not sure what more you could do. You could try small claims and use any messages as proof that he was supposed to pay you back. Or go on judge Rinder?!!!

trailingspouse

Stop being understanding!!


You don't have to be nasty or threatening, just assertive. Write a letter setting out how much he owes, keep it simple, and tell him you need him to pay by such and such a date (two weeks is reasonable). Do it soon, because it'll be Christmas before we know where we are and he definitely won't be able to find the money then.
In the meantime practice your response next time someones asks you to lend them some money. Repeat after me - no. And again - no. Once more - no.

racquel

I've always been understanding if not a little miffed, he got paid monthly when he worked with me but got 2 weeks in and always wanted to borrow £20-40 , the last time he asked a few week before he left I said that if you keep borrowing then you're down as soon as you get paid, he then told me how much he was paying out a month, he lives alone and has child support and the loan to pay back among other things, he told me exactly how much everything was, I have to admit I would struggle and I'm savvy! I've never demanded or had a go but when he missed a couple of payments because they didn't pay him for a couple days sick( he would have got sick pay in his role but he didn't phone in so they didn't give him it) I did say that it was now having an effect on me cos his stuff was nearing the end of bnpl and interest would incur if the payments were not met.
As I've said I'll wait and see what happens friday