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Sadly too late for me
Martin_R
Posts: 40 Forumite
Please read this post not as a cry for help - it isn’t - but a warning for people getting into debt.
I owe just over £12,000 in credit card debts.
Please do not judge me.
When my parents passed away I became depressed, and still am. When I get depressed I spend money, money I don’t have on credit cards and for a few hours I feel excited looking forward to the delivery which is more often than not, presents for others.
I never miss a payment, and don’t have a bad credit score, but can only afford the minimum payment. When I am given a credit limit increase I just think of who I can make happy with a present, and also use the credit cards to pay off each other.
Yes, I know all of this is stupid, but please tell the other side of me that which says “don’t worry, it will sort itself out”.
I can’t get a loan as the negative on my credit score is that I use more than 50% of my available credit.
On Friday I received an E-mail from Capital One (who I owe £1979 to), saying ...
‘Dear Martin,
We've noticed that over the last 18 months, a bigger portion of what you paid back on your credit card went towards interest, fees and charges than to paying off what you borrowed.
It means new rules apply to you. Our regulator (the FCA) has introduced them to protect anyone in this situation getting into difficulty with long-term borrowing on credit cards. It's called persistent debt and it can happen when monthly repayments stay low for a long time.
The fix is to pay more each month
Boosting how much you repay each month now could help you avoid some of the steps we have to take later. (More on that below.) The bigger your payments, the faster you pay back what you've borrowed, costing you less in interest. To help, we've done the maths.
It'll save you money
Let's use your current balance of £1979.59 as an example.
If you fix your payment at £106* every month from now on, you could pay 84% less interest than if you make the minimum payment. You'd pay off your card 12 times faster too.
Here's how to do it
If you pay by Direct Debit
Increase your monthly amount. You can view and edit your Direct Debit in your Capital One app It's free to download if you don't already have it. Otherwise give us a call.
If you pay by debit card, or another way
Make your monthly payments bigger when you pay via your app, phone or online account. You can make extra payments at any time too.
Sign in to manage payments
Better to sort it sooner rather than later
If your payments aren't high enough to change your situation in the next 18 months, we'll be back in touch. We'll offer ways for you to repay quicker, over a reasonable period. It'd be important for you to take action from there because we might have to suspend your card if you don't. Making low repayments for long periods can hurt your credit file.
Importantly, you'd be on the path out of persistent debt, because you'd be paying back a bigger chunk of what you'd borrowed.’
I cannot pay off more, Capital One won’t lower the interest, my situation of paying minimum payments won’t change in the next 18 months, and I know that if they are sending this, others will follow.
I won’t spend anything else on the cards, but they still want extra money.
Yes, I could give it to them and pay no one else.
(I don’t have anyone I could ask to help me by the way)
My point of this, and please no sympathy or pity, the only way for me is to look for ways to end my life, which hopefully will be sooner rather than later once I find a home for my dog.
That might seem tragic or shocking to some, but it would be a way of no longer having to dread waking up and putting false smiles on.
This new rule from the FCA will put others in the same position as mine I am sure, so please if you can, reduce your debts by trying to get the help you need before it is too late. For me it is.
Thankyou for reading this.
I owe just over £12,000 in credit card debts.
Please do not judge me.
When my parents passed away I became depressed, and still am. When I get depressed I spend money, money I don’t have on credit cards and for a few hours I feel excited looking forward to the delivery which is more often than not, presents for others.
I never miss a payment, and don’t have a bad credit score, but can only afford the minimum payment. When I am given a credit limit increase I just think of who I can make happy with a present, and also use the credit cards to pay off each other.
Yes, I know all of this is stupid, but please tell the other side of me that which says “don’t worry, it will sort itself out”.
I can’t get a loan as the negative on my credit score is that I use more than 50% of my available credit.
On Friday I received an E-mail from Capital One (who I owe £1979 to), saying ...
‘Dear Martin,
We've noticed that over the last 18 months, a bigger portion of what you paid back on your credit card went towards interest, fees and charges than to paying off what you borrowed.
It means new rules apply to you. Our regulator (the FCA) has introduced them to protect anyone in this situation getting into difficulty with long-term borrowing on credit cards. It's called persistent debt and it can happen when monthly repayments stay low for a long time.
The fix is to pay more each month
Boosting how much you repay each month now could help you avoid some of the steps we have to take later. (More on that below.) The bigger your payments, the faster you pay back what you've borrowed, costing you less in interest. To help, we've done the maths.
It'll save you money
Let's use your current balance of £1979.59 as an example.
If you fix your payment at £106* every month from now on, you could pay 84% less interest than if you make the minimum payment. You'd pay off your card 12 times faster too.
Here's how to do it
If you pay by Direct Debit
Increase your monthly amount. You can view and edit your Direct Debit in your Capital One app It's free to download if you don't already have it. Otherwise give us a call.
If you pay by debit card, or another way
Make your monthly payments bigger when you pay via your app, phone or online account. You can make extra payments at any time too.
Sign in to manage payments
Better to sort it sooner rather than later
If your payments aren't high enough to change your situation in the next 18 months, we'll be back in touch. We'll offer ways for you to repay quicker, over a reasonable period. It'd be important for you to take action from there because we might have to suspend your card if you don't. Making low repayments for long periods can hurt your credit file.
Importantly, you'd be on the path out of persistent debt, because you'd be paying back a bigger chunk of what you'd borrowed.’
I cannot pay off more, Capital One won’t lower the interest, my situation of paying minimum payments won’t change in the next 18 months, and I know that if they are sending this, others will follow.
I won’t spend anything else on the cards, but they still want extra money.
Yes, I could give it to them and pay no one else.
(I don’t have anyone I could ask to help me by the way)
My point of this, and please no sympathy or pity, the only way for me is to look for ways to end my life, which hopefully will be sooner rather than later once I find a home for my dog.
That might seem tragic or shocking to some, but it would be a way of no longer having to dread waking up and putting false smiles on.
This new rule from the FCA will put others in the same position as mine I am sure, so please if you can, reduce your debts by trying to get the help you need before it is too late. For me it is.
Thankyou for reading this.
0
Comments
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It is never too late. There are various debt relief solutions out there. Please go to one of the debt charities for help.0
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Hi Martin, I have just read your post, it made me cry. There will be many others along who can offer you help shortly, there are many experts on this forum. This problem is solvable, it's only money. I had a very good friend who took her life just over a year ago. She is now at peace but she left holes in the lives of many people. Please search out help for yourself. Keep posting and you will find you have many virtual friends willing to help, Sue. ( mumtoomany)Frugal Living Challenge 2023.
Trying to live on only £2640 for the year for most meals for seven people. Now only feeding, mostly, two. New total £1860.
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6414174/im-back-trying-to-spend-less-on-food#latest
Spent in 2023: £1846.53/£1860. Now on £96.08 for 2024. Lost the plot with adding up! Now trying with as little as possible to end of the year.0 -
HI Martin,
I am sorry to hear that you are feeling so awful, but this really isn't the end of the world for you.
Before we start talking about the money, I want you to make a note that you are going to call your GP tomorrow and make an appointment. You need some support with how you are feeling at the moment and your GP can signpost you to these services. In the meantime, please call and speak to the Samaritans today - 116 123. You can also email them. Their website is https://www.samaritans.org/
I have used the Samaritans several times over the years and have always ended the call feeling calmer and more in control. Please don't suffer in silence.
Your debt situation can be sorted. Can you post your SOA on here - this is the link, as this will help us to identify the best options for you.
From the info you have given , it may be that a DMP is the best option for you. This will normally freeze interest and charges and your payments would be set an affordable level that would enable you to meet your essential livings costs. It would damage your credit file for 6 years. however from what you have said, this won't matter as you won't be taking out any more credit. The main thing to remember is that THERE WILL BE A WAY OUT OF THIS FOR YOU!!. Marting Lewis always says that he has never seen a debt problem that isn't solvable.
I strongly suggest that you call stepchange - they are the Uk's free debt charity and they are highly skills in giving you advice. https://www.stepchange.org/ . They will be able to tell you which option is best for you, based on your circumstances.
Early last year I owed in excess of 60K, on Credit cards and loans and I am managing to pay it back whilst still having a life. There are many many people on here with debts far far higher than yours, and whilst I know it's all relative, 12K is so not worth ending your life over - in fact not amount of money is!
Please keep posting - you will get loads of support on here, and please make the GP appointment tomorrow morning. Tell them that you need to see your GP today and don't take no for an answer.
I will private message you with my email address so that you can contact me if you want to talk.
Take care
WD0 -
Hi, Martin.
It's absolutely not too late, you can sort this, but you need some help. People like step change can give you a hand, or you can pop to your local CAB and they can help you to negotiate an interest freeze or repayments with your creditors. £12,000 may seem a lot and it may feel like you have no options, but your life is worth far more than this. It's just money, the worst that will happen if you can't pay yet is that you get a few defaults on your credit file.
Have you been to see your GP? It sounds like you could do with some support to help you with your depression and how you're feeling, and this is the best place to start. The Samaritans are there 24 hours a day, and they are there if you need someone to talk to now. Their number's 116 123 if you're in the UK or Ireland. You deserve help, please call them!!0 -
Please read this post not as a cry for help - it isn’t - but a warning for people getting into debt.
I owe just over £12,000 in credit card debts.
I cannot pay off more, Capital One won’t lower the interest, my situation of paying minimum payments won’t change in the next 18 months, and I know that if they are sending this, others will follow.
I won’t spend anything else on the cards, but they still want extra money.
Yes, I could give it to them and pay no one else.
(I don’t have anyone I could ask to help me by the way)
My point of this, and please no sympathy or pity, the only way for me is to look for ways to end my life, which hopefully will be sooner rather than later once I find a home for my dog.
That might seem tragic or shocking to some, but it would be a way of no longer having to dread waking up and putting false smiles on.
This new rule from the FCA will put others in the same position as mine I am sure, so please if you can, reduce your debts by trying to get the help you need before it is too late. For me it is.
Thankyou for reading this.
I think when this rule came in Martin said it was generally a good thing but could have unintended consequences. One of the consequences seems to be that people post here, so that's good.
If you are 12 k in debt (you have other debts?) and can only make minimum payments than you do need a solution/strategy that at least freezes interest, so that any payments reduce your debt. You may need something a bit more heavy duty than that.
If you post a statement of affairs, we can have a look at the big picture and suggest something0 -
Agree with Fatbelly here.
Martin, there are numerous debt solutions that people can take, that is why they exist, to help people that need them.
Your situation is completely solvable, some posters on here owe in excess of 100k on credit cards and loans, the same solutions exist for them as well.
Post up you SOA, and we can help you find a way out of this, its really simple and easy..I’m a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on the Debt free wannabe, Credit file and ratings, and Bankruptcy and living with it boards. If you need any help on these boards, do let me know. Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any posts you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button, or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.For free non-judgemental debt advice, contact either Stepchange, National Debtline, or CitizensAdviceBureaux.Link to SOA Calculator- https://www.stoozing.com/soa.php The "provit letter" is here-https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/2607247/letter-when-you-know-nothing-about-about-the-debt-aka-prove-it-letter0 -
My point of this, and please no sympathy or pity, the only way for me is to look for ways to end my life, which hopefully will be sooner rather than later once I find a home for my dog.
That might seem tragic or shocking to some, but it would be a way of no longer having to dread waking up and putting false smiles on..
Get yoursef to your doctor, you're depressed and need help.
Read this
https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/credit-cards/mental-health-guide/
Money is just money. Stop using it to buy presents, people will like you without you doing that, and your dog will be unhappy without you, so don't go looking for ways to get rid of it.
You don't have a massive amount of debt and a DMP would probably soon get rid of it, there's always a way with debt to get out of it, no need to keep putting on false smiles, use the energy to post here and we can help you find a solution or find someone who can.Shampoo? No thanks, I'll have real poo...0 -
Spending money is a common symptom of depression as it temporarily makes you feel better about things. It is only a bit later that the spending spree and it's fallout cause the depression to worsen.
I agree with a lot of the advice already given:- Contact your GP and make an appointment to discuss your mental health
- Seeing how you appear to have been suffering for a while now, I suggest you ask about IAPT (Improving Access to Psychological Therapies) with your GP, so that you can receive counselling in addition to any medication your GP feels is appropriate.
- Contact Stepchange asap so that you can put together a workable plan of action. It'll relieve a lot of the stress.
- Post up your SOA so that we can give better advice that is more appropriate for your needs.
I work within the voluntary sector, supporting vulnerable people to rebuild their lives.
I love my job0 -
Martin when you say it is too late please don't be considering anything drastic. There are ways out of the debt or at least to make it more manageable. Companies may play hard ball but when it comes down to it, 50% of payments or 10% of payments is better than none if you are unable to pay more.
Oh and go to your doctor about counselling it is free, though there may be a waiting list.Paid off the last of my unsecured debts in 2016. Then saved up and bought a property. Current aim is to pay off my mortgage as early as possible. Currently over paying every month. Mortgage due to be paid off in 2036 hoping to get it paid off much earlier. Set up my own bespoke spreadsheet to manage my money.0 -
Stepchange will be able to help. Have you things you dont need that you can sell? Can you let any of the people you have bought presents for know you are having problems?
You say there is no one to help but some who have received gifts may be more than glad to help - even if it is just by selling or paying you for what you have bought for them.Aiming to make £7,500 online in 20220
This discussion has been closed.
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