Need advice

billy2shots

Whilst I respect your opinion hazyjo I do have to disagree that post count matters. I have read a huge amount of great quality information from new(ish) posters and quite the opposite from posters with large figures next to their name.

To be clear, the OP is in remission, they state that finances are hard and they do not wish to be forced out after a short amount of time.

Comms advice was completely the opposite. PIt has the potential to cause financial and psychological harm to someone who is already struggling. How that advice can be perceived as correct is baffling.

Thanks for explaining the 'repot button ' to me and I admit to being hasty. It's the straw that broke the camels back as he/she has a different opinion on another thread and has subsequently trolled back to some posts I made over the weekend to name call.

I'm not sure how the forum works so just press the new posts button and this was top. Coincidentally comms had commented in here (I know that sounds wrong even typing it myself lol).


To the OP?

There are still people out there you can get advice from. McMillan are there for you even after treatment. Pop along to a coffee morning somewhere local and share. Someone will be able to point you in the right direction.

Good luck.

Comms69

billy2shots wrote: »

Whilst I respect your opinion hazyjo I do have to disagree that post count matters. I have read a huge amount of great quality information from new(ish) posters and quite the opposite from posters with large figures next to their name.

To be clear, the OP is in remission, they state that finances are hard and they do not wish to be forced out after a short amount of time.

Comms advice was completely the opposite. PIt has the potential to cause financial and psychological harm to someone who is already struggling. How that advice can be perceived as correct is baffling.

Thanks for explaining the 'repot button ' to me and I admit to being hasty. It's the straw that broke the camels back as he/she has a different opinion on another thread and has subsequently trolled back to some posts I made over the weekend to name call.

I'm not sure how the forum works so just press the new posts button and this was top. Coincidentally comms had commented in here (I know that sounds wrong even typing it myself lol).


To the OP?

There are still people out there you can get advice from. McMillan are there for you even after treatment. Pop along to a coffee morning somewhere local and share. Someone will be able to point you in the right direction.

Good luck.

You sure that was me?...

Given I haven’t looked you up once, I must be both psychic and sleep typing.

jonnygee2

I got diagnosed with breast cancer not long afterwards

This must have been very difficult. I'm glad you are in remission.

We don't have the money now to try

If you can't afford to rent a house privately then your only option is housing benefit / council housing. Have you spoken to someone about what you are entitled to?

as they won't allow pets etc and I can't face moving in somewhere and the told to move after 6 months

Some landlords do allow pets, and many will sign contracts for longer than 6 months. In fact, you may well be able to get someone to accept pets if you sign a contract for 3 years in return - for a lot of landlords long term lets are better.

Cakeguts

hazyjo wrote: »

Ah, gotcha. Had one of those on here (3 different guises, sussed them all), got another on a train company FB group, and another on a Chingford group. I just think of them all as fans now

In my experience they tend to have NPD and they are on FB groups and other forums because no one likes them and they can only get heard on forums or FB groups. I have found several on FB groups and in other places. There are two very good signs. Firstly they are never ever wrong about anything so you are never going to get an apology even if you can prove that they have got something wrong. Secondly they always report you. Doesn't matter if the information you have provided is correct or not if they think that there is any likely chance that they will be proved wrong you will be reported. What usually gives it away is the quick response to reporting. People with NPD are all about control. They don't like anything that is different to their opinion or what they think is correct so if someone offers a different opinion they generally finish up being reported.



Weak admin that doesn't realise that they are dealing with NPD tend to remove the person who has been reported from the group because they don't realise that they are being manipulated. The speed of reporting tells you how many times the person has got away with this manipulation.



I stop posting on any thread anywhere if someone like this tries to take control because you finish up with only people who agree with them and fawn over them and give them plenty of attention and no normal people because they have all been reported or made to feel bad about their posts. My mother had NPD so I have done my bit with people like that and I don't feel that I can be bothered to deal with anyone else who has it. Life is too short.

billy2shots

Cakeguts wrote: »

In my experience they tend to have NPD and they are on FB groups and other forums because no one likes them and they can only get heard on forums or FB groups. I have found several on FB groups and in other places. There are two very good signs. Firstly they are never ever wrong about anything so you are never going to get an apology even if you can prove that they have got something wrong. Secondly they always report you. Doesn't matter if the information you have provided is correct or not if they think that there is any likely chance that they will be proved wrong you will be reported. What usually gives it away is the quick response to reporting. People with NPD are all about control. They don't like anything that is different to their opinion or what they think is correct so if someone offers a different opinion they generally finish up being reported.



Weak admin that doesn't realise that they are dealing with NPD tend to remove the person who has been reported from the group because they don't realise that they are being manipulated. The speed of reporting tells you how many times the person has got away with this manipulation.



I stop posting on any thread anywhere if someone like this tries to take control because you finish up with only people who agree with them and fawn over them and give them plenty of attention and no normal people because they have all been reported or made to feel bad about their posts. My mother had NPD so I have done my bit with people like that and I don't feel that I can be bothered to deal with anyone else who has it. Life is too short.

Umm, hi. comms has a personal issue with me so whilst I'm saddened that they are spreading untruths about me I can understand where it's coming from.

I don't believe we have interacted Cakeguts so I really hope you just haven't climbed aboard the newbie bashing bus.

For clarification comms, sangie and nicechap disagree with me in another thread. Plenty of experience members disagree with them but I have been singled out and followed to other threads. I'm called s troll, stalker and former member with a grudge. Worst of all I have been discriminated against and made fun of for my English (being my second language).

I'm big enough to ignore a few members but their weapon is to quickly bring up the troll card and then more and more people jump on the bandwagon without knowledge of what is teally going on.

When I am forced to write something like this and defend myself (I should be allowed shouldn't I?) I am accused of taking threads off topic and the vicious circle starts again.

All I would ask is read threads like this back in order and see who takes things off topic and starts casting accusations. The evidence speaks for itself.

Cakeguts

billy2shots wrote: »

Umm, hi. comms has a personal issue with me so whilst I'm saddened that they are spreading untruths about me I can understand where it's coming from.

I don't believe we have interacted Cakeguts so I really hope you just haven't climbed aboard the newbie bashing bus.

For clarification comms, sangie and nicechap disagree with me in another thread. Plenty of experience members disagree with them but I have been singled out and followed to other threads. I'm called s troll, stalker and former member with a grudge. Worst of all I have been discriminated against and made fun of for my English (being my second language).

I'm big enough to ignore a few members but their weapon is to quickly bring up the troll card and then more and more people jump on the bandwagon without knowledge of what is teally going on.

When I am forced to write something like this and defend myself (I should be allowed shouldn't I?) I am accused of taking threads off topic and the vicious circle starts again.

All I would ask is read threads like this back in order and see who takes things off topic and starts casting accusations. The evidence speaks for itself.

There are some things that I will say about your post.



1 You are not obliged to post on any forum so if you don't like what people write leave the forum. I have left FB groups over the people with NPD.



2 On a forum you are never forced to write anything. You chose to write something.


3 You are not obliged to read any posts on any forums if you read them that is your choice.



4 People are allowed to disagree with each other on forums that is called "a discussion."



5 People who are entering "a discusion" do not report other members if they write something that they don't agree with.



6 There is a thread somewhere on this forum that I will never read or post on again because someone on there shouted at me using CAPITAL letters and at my age and with my background I will not be shouted at by anyone. Plus I know that there in no point in trying to defend myself against someone who knows that they are right.

Comms69

billy2shots wrote: »

Umm, hi. comms has a personal issue with me so whilst I'm saddened that they are spreading untruths about me I can understand where it's coming from. - no issue here. You're the one reporting my posts

I don't believe we have interacted Cakeguts so I really hope you just haven't climbed aboard the newbie bashing bus.

For clarification comms, sangie and nicechap disagree with me in another thread. Plenty of experience members disagree with them but I have been singled out and followed to other threads. - Im sorry you feel that way, but if you look back you were the one criticising my posts. It's all there for anyone else to see. I'm called s troll, stalker and former member with a grudge. Worst of all I have been discriminated against and made fun of for my English (being my second language). - English is my second language, so again this was nothing to do with me. (your English is fine)

I'm big enough to ignore a few members but their weapon is to quickly bring up the troll card and then more and more people jump on the bandwagon without knowledge of what is teally going on. - I haven't called you a troll.

When I am forced to write something like this and defend myself (I should be allowed shouldn't I?) I am accused of taking threads off topic and the vicious circle starts again. - it's fine, the posts you reported have been removed as MSE tend to do, to be on the safe side. so the thread was already taken off topic by you

All I would ask is read threads like this back in order and see who takes things off topic and starts casting accusations. The evidence speaks for itself.

Indeed it does

billy2shots

Coms,

My comment is below. It was a comment regarding this thread and this thread only. I disagreed with your advice, nothing personal, I just a different opinion. You could have been any member giving that advice, I still would have commented.


The OP has clearly mentioned she couldn't face moving again after 6 months yet you advocate dishonesty which could lead to eviction. Add in financial loss through a possible lost deposit.

Then there's the landlord to think about who chose not to accept a pet which you want to sneak in.

Everyone's a loser!

No idea why you would give shocking advice like this to someone in a such a sensitive position as the OP.


Your reply is below. It has nothing to do with this thread, it's only personal towards me. Surely you can see that this happening in 5 different threads towards me is wrong. Taking threads off topic to name call and then blame me for the one derailing threads is baffling. Can you see my point?

Comms69 wrote: »

Don't worry this is my forum stalker, he's literally searched the forums to find my posts.


He's an expert on employment law, you can go check out how well his advice was received there. And now tenancy law too!

Comms69

billy2shots wrote: »

Coms,

My comment is below. It was a comment regarding this thread and this thread only. I disagreed with your advice, nothing personal, I just a different opinion. You could have been any member giving that advice, I still would have commented. - That's fine. If you report every post you disagree with, you will make lots of friends i'm sure.


The OP has clearly mentioned she couldn't face moving again after 6 months yet you advocate dishonesty which could lead to eviction. Add in financial loss through a possible lost deposit.

Then there's the landlord to think about who chose not to accept a pet which you want to sneak in.

Everyone's a loser!

No idea why you would give shocking advice like this to someone in a such a sensitive position as the OP.



Reported - you missed a bit off

Your reply is below. It has nothing to do with this thread, it's only personal towards me. Surely you can see that this happening in 5 different threads towards me is wrong. Taking threads off topic to name call and then blame me for the one derailing threads is baffling. Can you see my point?

My post wasn't a reply to you, it was a reply to another forum member