Tidying up the mess

DrSpendLittle

I agree with Enthusiastic, you need little treats every now and then whilst debt busting, otherwise it becomes such a slog.

I don't fully endorse the 'beans and rice, rice and beans' approach that Dave Ramsey takes for this reason. I think that each individual needs to work with their own personality strengths and if that means allowing some form of treat, whether it be at certain milestones or at anytime, then that's absolutely fine.

I could have technically cleared my debt in 12 months if I'd had no treats, no summer holiday, no weekends away with family, no new clothes etc. But in the end it took me 20 months and I wouldn't have done it any differently. That approach also provided me with the confidence that I could manage my money in a way that allowed treats and paid off debt.

As long as your reason for getting out of debt is big and present enough in your life, you'll be just fine. Enjoy our little trip away, you've earned it and you should celebrate your success so far!

BabyStepper

enthusiasticsaver wrote: »

Glad you had no problem with your new mortgage deal. Did you stick with TSB? I think that was who you were with wasn't it? £100 less is great. You will have lots of ideas as to what to do with the extra £1400 per month next March. Mortgage overpayments, holidays, pension, investments etc etc. Keep your eyes focused on that.

We're still with the TSB, they were great with me/us, really listened and put my mind at ease then offered the advertised rate which worked out so much cheaper. It was also great to chat to someone IRL genuinely interested in our finances, where and how to find life insurance, buildings insurance, contents, changing needs over a lifetime. I honestly felt the adviser wanted to help and really encouraged us to talk, listened to concerns about brexit and recession, and she gave us all the help she could. First time I have ever felt confident in such a meeting too, I know my stuff after hanging around here for a year. The spare cash is sitting in our joint account, some has been used for OH's unexpected dental treatment, mostly it's providing an extra layer of buffer to protect my plan.

I tried to go back and read over my posts about my mortgage, but I couldn't face it. I don't know where the anxiety came from, I'm just glad it's gone and that I'm making headway with this plan. Need to keep on it.

I'll keep you posted about the Millionaire Next Door. Looking forward to it arriving.

BabyStepper

DrSpendLittle wrote: »

I agree with Enthusiastic, you need little treats every now and then whilst debt busting, otherwise it becomes such a slog.

I don't fully endorse the 'beans and rice, rice and beans' approach that Dave Ramsey takes for this reason. I think that each individual needs to work with their own personality strengths and if that means allowing some form of treat, whether it be at certain milestones or at anytime, then that's absolutely fine.

I could have technically cleared my debt in 12 months if I'd had no treats, no summer holiday, no weekends away with family, no new clothes etc. But in the end it took me 20 months and I wouldn't have done it any differently. That approach also provided me with the confidence that I could manage my money in a way that allowed treats and paid off debt.

As long as your reason for getting out of debt is big and present enough in your life, you'll be just fine. Enjoy our little trip away, you've earned it and you should celebrate your success so far!

I keep wondering about 'rice and beans' as well, I know it's a metaphor and I've heard him say he does not literally mean 'live on only rice and beans' but still, I just can't manage putting every single spare penny to debt. I like DR because he is clued up about people, but I do wonder if his approach encourages a poverty/deprivation way of thinking that is bad for mental health? I'm also looking for a balance that can last a lifetime and it needs to start here.

pidge04

Wow, what an inspiration!

Scott-Weiland

re poverty and deprivation and mental health there would be a link. I have read so much stuff online and watched podcasts regarding poor mental health having links with inconclusive diet.

Poor nutrition can cause the brain too produce less serotonin the feel good hormone. Plus if your skint you less likely too be able too afford too have things like a gym membership which boosts mental health say or socialise with people. Increased isolation due too debts can cause this.

Re rice and beans stuff that. Clear you debts as best you can but stuff living off rice and beans unless your trying too save on bubble bath.lol

PositiveBalance

I don't blame you on booking your break away - the occasional treat is no harm.

BabyStepper wrote: »

I keep wondering about 'rice and beans' as well, I know it's a metaphor and I've heard him say he does not literally mean 'live on only rice and beans' but still, I just can't manage putting every single spare penny to debt. I like DR because he is clued up about people, but I do wonder if his approach encourages a poverty/deprivation way of thinking that is bad for mental health? I'm also looking for a balance that can last a lifetime and it needs to start here.

I was listening to the DR podcast last night and a lady called up complaining about never going out and wouldn't it be ok to go out to the cinema once a week or very similar. His reply was 'why not try the beans and rice approach for 30 days?' He went on to explain that trying something very different to what the caller had been doing and therefore having to change their way of thinking about money would make them reflect on things on how they have been doing things until that point. Seems reasonable to me.

I doubt it's a good idea to maintain it over the very long term but I imagine that if a person has truly had the mindset shift from what got them into this mess to what will get them out and understands that a treat is truly an occasional thing, the occasional planned treat is likely to be ok.

I don't think he encourages a poverty mentality, more a 'get out of debt so you can get rich' mentality.

Oh, and the 'beans and rice' metaphor...Americans eat out at restaurants a LOT more than we do. All the time. I think this helps to encourage some home cooking!

Scott-Weiland

If you like podcasts lol watch the Joe Rogan Dr Phil one. The link is below some of the states Dr Phil comes out with regarding America and drug use and antidepressant use is astounding.

https://youtu.be/65epASHLblo

re diet no lol you can do a mindset shift without eating rice and beans.

enthusiasticsaver

I think everyone has to find their own way of dealing with debt, saving for something or just living within budget. The exceptions to that are those who have let their debt grow and now reached a critical point. So long as the debt is at 0% as babysteppers is it makes little difference if the debt is repaid at 1 year, 2 years or so on. However the psychology behind wanting rid of it I can understand. I am just not sure the DR approach works for everyone if every spare penny is directed to debt with no leeway for entertainment, clothes etc.

Scott-Weiland

enthusiasticsaver wrote: »

I think everyone has to find their own way of dealing with debt, saving for something or just living within budget. The exceptions to that are those who have let their debt grow and now reached a critical point. So long as the debt is at 0% as babysteppers is it makes little difference if the debt is repaid at 1 year, 2 years or so on. However the psychology behind wanting rid of it I can understand. I am just not sure the DR approach works for everyone if every spare penny is directed to debt with no leeway for entertainment, clothes etc.

I have too agree here hammering everything off debt too the point you are living off 9p tins of baked beans or not even having a small social life is a bad idea. Okay fair enough if your having 2-3 takeaways a week or eating out every 2-3 times a week its not going to work. But we are human we deserve a small treat from time to time,

BabyStepper

I'm glad everyone agrees that a treat now and again is ok. I have been guilty in the past of buying one treat then not being able to stop, but I think it's different this time. Also the first time I have budgeted properly for something like this, not gone '£90 for a spa hotel, bargain, let's go!' then wondered why I spent so much (after travel, dinner, drinks, etc are added in). Me and OH have agreed to have a very frugal month next month, OH's idea, good to have him onboard.

Scott - your comments about beans and bubble bath gave me a giggle - ewww!!! About Dave R, does anyone else do the 'giving' he talks about? It seems the advice on here is to stop all charity payments until you're debt free, not that I made any before anyway, but does he also mean gifts to family and friends? What does he mean? I don't want to become miserly and grabby with what I have, not appealing. I don't belong to a church, I can't imagine giving 10% away either. But it might not hurt to give something (just trying to counteract the poverty mentality again I guess). But how much, and to whom?

I thought I'd bite the bullet and do my tax return yesterday. It's not due until January next year and I probably would have made some interest by keeping the cash in a high interest account until then. However, it's my first tax return and I didn't want any nasty surprises so I got the books out and did it. Everything filed, sorted and tax and NI contributions paid. Looks like my calculations were correct. By the time I'm doing this next year I will be debt free and have pension payments to add in to my return.

Talking of which, I have opened a private pension and began the process of gathering up old pensions into the new account. This could take a while so I thought I'd be ready. I'll see how I go with that one.