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Worried that I've lost credibility with agents

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Hi everyone,

Well I've been a bit neurotic about buying a house for years now and it's time to get serious. Unfortunately I think I've lessened my credibility with agents through my years of searching.

First started looking back in 2013. Saw dozens of houses and eventually felt brave enough to put in an offer but pulled out due to personal issues that came up at the time.

Started looking again in 2016 and did a fair few viewings. Didn't put in any offers and eventually got burned out with it.

Had another look in 2017. Put in a low offer on a place and didn't get it. Then started to panic and feel a lot of regret about how much prices had risen. Feeling under pressure, I put in three other offers but withdrew them very quickly.

I'm worried that I've completely blown my credibility with loads of agents now. It's a booming market in the city where I live now so I feel like my chances of being able to buy here are slim if estate agents think I'm flakey.

Just wondering how bad you guys think this situation is and if there's anything I can do about it. Eg. approach agents again, appear confident, let them know that I'm serious, offer to sign pre-sales contracts, offer to pay some deposit early in the process etc.

I'd appreciate your thoughts. Honestly feeling a lot of fear and regret about the way I've gone about this.
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Comments

  • diggingdude
    diggingdude Posts: 2,492 Forumite
    Seventh Anniversary 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    They only wan't your money, I imagine they would work with you but if two offers came in and were the same value they would understandably recommend the other purchaser over you if there was a greater chance of sale
    An answer isn't spam just because you don't like it......
  • As I feared. Well there's so much competition for places round here that I think that almost puts me out of the game :(

    What about my proposed solutions?
  • AnotherJoe
    AnotherJoe Posts: 19,622 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Fifth Anniversary Name Dropper Photogenic
    Foolish / pointless. How do you "let them know you are serious" before making an offer for example? It could also get you into more trouble such as ending up with a non returnable deposit on a place that the survey shows is crumbling or appearing desperate and end up paying top dollar.


    I suspect you are now getting neurotic not about houses but about what people might think or do, some of this is offers you made 5 years ago, how many will remember that far back, or even to 2016?

    Just get on without fretting bout what might happen. But this time only make an offer when you are sure about the house, the area and whats affordable.
  • muz3562
    muz3562 Posts: 81 Forumite
    Ninth Anniversary 10 Posts Combo Breaker
    I would not worry too much . Agents understand that buying a house is a big decision and very big commitment . They will see people viewing all the time without offering . They will also deal with people withdrawing offers all of the time . I highly doubt with the number of properties and people they will have dealt with they will remember you .



    I would personally not bother offering pre sales contract and would be wary of parting with cash prior to any survey for obvious reason .



    Get everything back together and start viewing again .
  • Nicosy
    Nicosy Posts: 46 Forumite
    10 Posts Second Anniversary
    AnotherJoe wrote: »
    I suspect you are now getting neurotic not about houses but about what people might think or do, some of this is offers you made 5 years ago, how many will remember that far back, or even to 2016?

    Just get on without fretting bout what might happen. But this time only make an offer when you are sure about the house, the area and whats affordable.

    Totally agree with this. I have family and friends who are estate agents and, although I love them to bits, I don't think they remember much of anything prior to last week! :p

    Seriously though, just go in full of confidence telling yourself "of course I'm a serious buyer" and the EA will eat it up.

    Good luck!
  • steampowered
    steampowered Posts: 6,176 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    I doubt anybody is going to remember that you made an offer (or withdrew an offer) several years ago.

    The estate agent you offered with in 2017 may remember you but that's probably about it. Even then, there could have been 100 legitimate reasons to withdraw an offer.

    At the end of the day, the estate agent is obliged to put offers forward to the seller. And the seller decides which offer to accept.

    It sounds like you are worrying about nothing. You just have to focus on your own mindset: make a firm decision whether you want to buy or not; decide on your budget; view houses within budget; then start making offers.
  • thelem
    thelem Posts: 774 Forumite
    As others have said I doubt the agents really remember you. You've mentioned 5 offers and that you've pulled out of 4, so I'd guess that's only one offer per agent, which is nothing for that agent to find remarkable. Agents don't mind doing viewings because it make it look like they are doing a good job for their client.

    Why do you think the market is booming where you are? If it's because estate agents have told you that you must get an offer in immediately then ignore them - they are just trying to pressure you. Have a look at https://www.getagent.co.uk which has stats for how long your local agents normally take to sell a property.

    Do you struggle with anxiety or indecision? You've described a pattern of changing your mind on big decisions, will that happen again this time round? If you think it might then consider what support you may need during the purchase process (which is always stressful). That might mean doing everything with a friend or relative, or it might mean therapy to help you understand your emotions.
    Note: Unless otherwise stated, my property related posts refer to England & Wales. Please make sure you state if you are discussing Scotland or elsewhere as laws differ.
  • Thanks for the replies.

    Thelem - the market is definitely booming in the city I live in. It's pretty hard to miss. Perhaps some agents do overstate it a bit, especially with regard to some less desirable properties. And yes, I do struggle with anxiety and indecision and I seriously lack confidence. To the point where it makes it's very difficult for friends and family to help me.

    This whole thing about thinking I've lost credibility with estate agents has also had me feeling very defeated.

    Thanks to those of you who offered me reassurance.

    I definitely think that diggingdude has a point though. True, some agents may have forgotten me but if they do remember me, I've not made it easy for myself. And I think I will be memorable to estate agents for a number of reasons. Firstly my unusual surname, secondly the number and kinds of questions I would ask and thirdly, how nervous I sometimes came across when asking those questions.

    Also, I'm guessing most estate agents keep some kind of record of their interactions with prospective buyers. When arranging viewings, I'm sure I've heard them say things like "I'll just bring you up on our system."
  • BrassicWoman
    BrassicWoman Posts: 3,218 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Mortgage-free Glee!
    edited 1 June 2018 at 6:58AM
    What is different now, compared to then, that makes you more serious?


    I guess my question is, "are you ready"?


    I've never seen loads of houses; just the three or four which met my very exact list of requirements. Do you have such a list?


    for example
    - flat with decent management company, so I do not have to organise window cleaner/ exterior painting/ gardener
    - ground floor, as I expect reduced mobility any day now, and step free access to outside

    - good sound insulation and as few adjoining neighbours as possible

    - bedroom + second room big enough for a study
    - dedicated parking space
    - near a corner shop and a bus route
    - with somewhere nearby to sit in the sun and read a book in the summer


    With that list I had 2 potential properties. I walked round the area first before bookig a viewing to check it was what I needed. Saw two, bought one.
    2021 GC £1365.71/ £2400
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 7,323 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    I think you are so bothered by what agents think about you, you aren't thinking about how to solve the real problem, how to be more confident in your decisions. I suspect you need to solve that one before buying a property. If friends and family can't help you maybe you need to take a step back from property and get some therapy to help with how you deal with making decisions. It could save a lot of stress and hassle in the long run.
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