Getting over my ex

Tabbytabitha

hollydays wrote: »

Speak to your doctor?
Get into dating again?
Find things to distract your mind.

Why the doctor?

gonzo127

Tabbytabitha wrote: »

Why the doctor?

i would guess to try and make sure that depression isnt creating problems, or if its like it is around here, we have a counselling service which can be referred to from the GP's in case that is needed

Loz01

I wouldnt say start dating or swiping on Tinder. I find thats always advice people give you when you break up and jesus, that is the LAST thing you want to do most of the time (or thats how I felt anyway) - just give it some time and concentrate on the kids and you. Do you have hobbies? Friends you can get out with for the odd evening, even if its just to the pub for an hour or two for a drink?

Fireflyaway

October wasn't that long ago. If it was a long term committed relationship then it's going to take a while to feel better. Keep busy and don't keep going over the past. You have kids to care for and you are a person I your own right. You don't have to be in a relationship to be complete.

Single_Dad_Still

Hi everyone. Thank you all for your kind words and good advice.

I guess it just feels like I should be over it by now, especially when the logical sensible side of my brain reminds me of the horrible times when I was made to feel so low.

But then something reminds me of the good times and it’s right back to square one again.

I know you’re all right when you say give it time, I just wish I didn’t feel so down when I think of her.

Onwards and upwards I suppose. I think I need to find a hobby and some friends!!!

Thanks again.

gonzo127

Single_Dad_Still wrote: »

Hi everyone. Thank you all for your kind words and good advice.

I guess it just feels like I should be over it by now, especially when the logical sensible side of my brain reminds me of the horrible times when I was made to feel so low.

But then something reminds me of the good times and it’s right back to square one again.

I know you’re all right when you say give it time, I just wish I didn’t feel so down when I think of her.

Onwards and upwards I suppose. I think I need to find a hobby and some friends!!!

Thanks again.

honestly dont feel down on yourself, grief (as thats what it is, you are in grief over the relationship) takes time.

wish i could offer words of advice, but i am in a similar situation wondering when i will be over my ex girlfriend, but there is no set time frame, everyone is different, but it will happen, waiting just sucks,

personally joined a local 'meetup' group and have gone out a few times with them to some comedy nights, which was fun and something i actually enjoyed (after my initial awkwardness of meeting completely new people). I dont know if you have the same problem as i have, but all this 'get a new hobby' suggestions sound great, but i dont have a clue on what i want to do as a hobby, so how do i find something to do?!?! followed by oh what do you enjoy........ erm well i dont know, if i did i would take it up as a hobby lol.

which is why i have looked at the meet ups, they seem to have a strange mix of things in my local area, so as i am getting to know a few more people in the group, i am going to push myself to try and few of the things im not sure if i will enjoy, and see what happens, not expecting to get a hobby quickly, but if i can at least experience some new things, who knows?

Jox

How are your children taking it? They lost their mum 10 years ago and now their "stepmum", it must be hard for all of you.

Whenever I have had crises in my life I have taken St John's Wort which has lifted my mood after a week (do your own research before taking anything like this) and read lots of self-help books, here are some ideas (or go to your library and see what they have)

https://humans.media/best-books-to-read-after-a-breakup

Good luck to you all

Single_Dad_Still

Thanks Gonzo. You!!!8217;re right, I don!!!8217;t know what I enjoy doing anymore.

When we were together I used to do what she wanted to try and keep her happy and kind of lost who I am along the way.

I also get anxious around new people/new situations so find it difficult to make friends.

Where did you find out about !!!8220;meetup!!!8221; groups? Sounds like just the thing I need.

Thanks again.

Single_Dad_Still

Jox, thank you. The kids are taking it fairly well.

My daughter never really got on with my ex (long story).

My son is still best mates with her son which keeps him happy but is an added complication for me.

Jox

https://www.meetup.com/

Here's the meetup website, you need to register

Hope you find some good groups to join