Elderly parent / selling her house

need_an_answer

lisyloo wrote: »

This does complicate matter if MIL dies and there is another beneficiary or MIL needs to go into care (but wouldn't need that £150K immedaitely if she has another £600K).

Adhoc and on demand care services in the home are actually higher costing than those in residential care if you look at them pro rata,so it is not inconceivable that MIL will be paying many thousands of pounds even to supplement the care that her daughter can give her.

Even £600K doesn't last that long in terms of long term care where the recipient has had a complex stroke that is life changing,to a point life limiting but isn't something that deteriorates in the same way that other conditions can.

OP I really do understand your flustrations,it must seem as if you are just locked into a situation that you see no end to.
It is worth remembering that whilst your MIL will continue to be self funded for hopefully a good few years there does come a point where some and then all of the costs can be taken by LA funding.

I wish you all well going forward.

ReadingTim

Trevor84 wrote: »

I find your statement quite offensive. Our first concern is for my MIL well-being.
We are not using the state as its all self-funded. Obviously I have to enquire about tax implications, hence why I'm on this forum!

You might very well find it offensive, but that doesn't alter the fact that many elderly and vulnerable people are taken advantage of by friends and relations in a very similar manner to what you're proposing. And for far smaller sums.

So, while it's perfectly sensible to investigate the tax and legal implications of what you're proposing, you might want to wind in your outrage at being "offended" - it is possible to protest too much, methinks - especially if someone like a solicitor came to the same view as I cynically articulated....

bouicca21

When my mother was in no longer able to live alone, I seriously looked at the possibility of creating an annex in which she could live. All my siblings agreed that money from the sale of her house could be used to fund the alterations (she no longer had capacity). But creating the annex was a minor problem compared with meeting her care needs. We lived in a different LA area and getting a commitment from our LA that they would provide the same care package as she got in her home area meant entering a Kafkaesque nightmare. We couldn't even find out if she could be taken to a lunch club in our area. Over and above that of course we would have needed extra helpers.

I am so glad we did not do it. In the end we realised that there was no way that we could provide the right level of care and attention that she needed (and deserved). A nursing home was well worth the cost.

Keep_pedalling

ReadingTim wrote: »

You might very well find it offensive, but that doesn't alter the fact that many elderly and vulnerable people are taken advantage of by friends and relations in a very similar manner to what you're proposing. And for far smaller sums.

So, while it's perfectly sensible to investigate the tax and legal implications of what you're proposing, you might want to wind in your outrage at being "offended" - it is possible to protest too much, methinks - especially if someone like a solicitor came to the same view as I cynically articulated....

From the info provided by the OP she would still have sufficient assets to fund many years of residential care if the family were unable to cope as her condition worsened.

Personally I would not do this in a million years. Caring for a frail elderly relative is hard work and can put an enormous strain on family relationships. A friend of mine looked after his disabled mother, and after several years his wife had to move out because the constant sniping from his mother.

I would also be concerned about the effect the move might have on the health of his MIL especially if she had to move back into residential care at a later date.

Blueday

need_an_answer wrote: »

Without the agreement of social services there is little point even weighing up your options.

What has it got to do with social services? The lady has the capacity to make her own decisions.

OP If it's what both your MIL and wife want then yes you are doing the right thing exploring it.

bris

Blueday wrote: »

What has it got to do with social services? The lady has the capacity to make her own decisions.

Hasn't it already been established the OP has POA? This means there is no capacity to make decisions.


POA is only granted if there is no capacity so OP what is it, POA or not?

xylophone

OP, has your MIL already been assessed for CHC funding?

https://www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/health-wellbeing/health-services/nhs-continuing-healthcare/

Blueday

bris wrote: »

Hasn't it already been established the OP has POA? This means there is no capacity to make decisions.


POA is only granted if there is no capacity so OP what is it, POA or not?

Trevor84 wrote: »

She had a serious stroke, but still has mental capacity

I assume it is a general POA i.e. someone with capacity delegates responsibility for finances to their nominated attorney.

xylophone

Hasn't it already been established the OP has POA? This means there is no capacity to make decisions.

This is not true.

The donor can be compos mentis and give the Attorney permission to register and use the PoA.

https://www.gov.uk/power-of-attorney



Property and financial affairs lasting power of attorney
Use this LPA to give an attorney the power to make decisions about money and property for you, for example:

managing a bank or building society account
paying bills
collecting benefits or a pension
selling your home

It can be used as soon as it's registered, with your permission.

Keep_pedalling

bris wrote: »

Hasn't it already been established the OP has POA? This means there is no capacity to make decisions.


POA is only granted if there is no capacity so OP what is it, POA or not?

That is incorrect. An LPA can be used from the day it is registered regardless of the mental condition of the donor. This has to be done with the permission of the donor if they have capacity, but it is very useful if the donor is housebound, or out of the country for a period of time and a host of other reasons.

I used my mothers to do her shopping, and online banking when she had capacity, but now do everything since her dementia advanced to the stage where she no longer had the capacity to do anything.