Cooking for one (Mark Three)

moneyistooshorttomention

caronc wrote: »

Struck me that what I was calling a CBA dinner from the point of view of feeding yourself from a :money: and nutrition point of view it wasn't too bad. HM soup with loads of veg used to make it, some carbs and protien/fat in the cheese. If I was still working I'd have been pretty ok with this after a long day and it tasted pretty good too:).

Nowt wrong with a nice home-made soup, bit of cheese and some decent bread with it. Not a dear meal - but it's a nice one imo.

[Deleted User]

money as you know I lived in wales a long time, n wales for 4 years and it was awful, the people shunned me because I spoke English, me a young mum with two small children. S Wales for 30 years was much better but tbh was quite difficult in parts when mixing with the `handshake` employees ie if you played rugby locally, you got a job, if you were the welsh sister of one you got the promotions. My subject was scarce so I got a job.



My friends were valleys people and were nice but `shallow` because I never went to school with them. Everyone from those areas went to church on sundays dressed up in the finest clothes they had, even though some had the meanest blackest hearts. You have to be born in wales and go to school there to have any chance, apart from a couple of areas that are more open to outsiders

bouicca21

Money, though we rarely agree on anything, I have considerable admiration for anyone who starts a new life in a new area. I decided I couldn't do it, so compromised on the kind of property I was prepared to live in. Hence living in a flat rather than a house.

I did move to another part of London, far enough to need to make an effort to find new friends but close enough to to the old area so as not to lose too much of the old life. It's taken nearly 4 years to settle into the new community, but I'm getting there.

It's hard to make new friends when one is older and presumably double hard when there's a language issue. But tbh you sound as though you are doing good. Hang on in there.

moneyistooshorttomention

Kittie - I get your point there - and actually am a bit surprised things were that way when you had children as well. It's a very child-centred area here and this is one of the things that is very different here for me. My own area isn't any more child-centred than normal and there is a lot going on for single childless people (which I certainly took advantage of). I admit to being gobsmacked at just how family-oriented things are here (not the best idea for someone who isnt in a family - but I would have thought it would be nice for those that are in a family).

I have this feeling that maybe it was accepted, to an extent, whilst everyone knew I was busy gutting this house/coupled with everyone jokes about these things taking much longer here (courtesy of the unreliable workmen that are frequent here). Now they can see my house is no longer "taking my focus" I guess they feel I "should" be learning the language? and I can be either bullied or charmed into doing so (would help if there was less of the former and more of the latter - but that's not how it seems to be....). On the other hand - I'm looking for more new activities etc - think I'll probably have a go at another one next week that I've "had my eye on" for a while.

Thank you Bouicca - I really appreciate you saying that - you just brought a tear to my eye with those comments:T. Thankfully - everyone can speak English - but it's the "being made to feel second class/and 'should' speak Welsh" that is the clincher. Thankfully, I'm not a schoolkid or after a public sector job - so basically (as a retiree) I can't be compelled to learn it (very thankfully).

caronc

Good morning everyone,

I totally get the "small town" mentality. I've been here 27 years but will always be an incomer, thankfully though it is basically a friendly place if you avoid the cliques and in recent years has become much less parochial as there are good rail links to Glasgow so folk moved from the city and commute. It was quite hard at first as I had a very young baby and didn't know anyone, it was only when my kids hit playgroup age that I began to make new friends. I would be loathe to live anywhere else now.
The lurgy persists so it's another day of fluids, paracetomel and rest on the cards. My balance is very wonky so won't be straying far but I hope to get some dead heading done later.
I have finally persuaded my Dad to buy some new (smaller) clothes and he's now a man on a mission. He popped by earlier and new shoes and undies have been ordered. My brother is taking him out next week to get some trousers, shirts etc. I reckon he's dropped a couple of sizes but because of his stoma bag will need measured. Once we know what size he actually needs I can order him some bits online. He's always been a guy who liked to look smart (ex-forces) and it's horrible to see him wearing stuff that was hanging off him so I'm glad he's agreed to get some new things.:)
Breakfast was the usual toast & fruit and lunch will be LOs from last night. I'm not sure about later, I might finally get that tray of roast veg made and work around that. The cold doesn't seem to have killed my appetite:)

[Deleted User]

yes children do help ease the way into a community, except in n wales but then that was the time of nationalism and bombings


I found a recipe that I have just finished making. Kind of like a crumble mix with added egg and blackcurrants mixed in. I made double and used 360g blackcurrants. It looks like a pudding/cake, I made 3 in earthenware dishes and will divide and freeze but have to try one portion after my salad


I think I am done being on my feet for the day, everything is finished including a wash hanging, dishwasher full to bursting, juice drank and kitchen tidy. The scones look very good, no sugar but I added LO goji berries as I want to use them plus chopped almonds in my old lakeland rotary chopper. Maybe I will just go up to make my bed and do a quick clean in the bathroom, I kind of like to `work` to lunchtime and then relax via reading, spinning etc

MeandO

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Kittie - I get your point there - and actually am a bit surprised things were that way when you had children as well. It's a very child-centred area here and this is one of the things that is very different here for me. My own area isn't any more child-centred than normal and there is a lot going on for single childless people (which I certainly took advantage of). I admit to being gobsmacked at just how family-oriented things are here (not the best idea for someone who isnt in a family - but I would have thought it would be nice for those that are in a family).

I have this feeling that maybe it was accepted, to an extent, whilst everyone knew I was busy gutting this house/coupled with everyone jokes about these things taking much longer here (courtesy of the unreliable workmen that are frequent here). Now they can see my house is no longer "taking my focus" I guess they feel I "should" be learning the language? and I can be either bullied or charmed into doing so (would help if there was less of the former and more of the latter - but that's not how it seems to be....). On the other hand - I'm looking for more new activities etc - think I'll probably have a go at another one next week that I've "had my eye on" for a while.

Thank you Bouicca - I really appreciate you saying that - you just brought a tear to my eye with those comments:T. Thankfully - everyone can speak English - but it's the "being made to feel second class/and 'should' speak Welsh" that is the clincher. Thankfully, I'm not a schoolkid or after a public sector job - so basically (as a retiree) I can't be compelled to learn it (very thankfully).

Hello moneyistooshorttomention.

I read your above post and just had to comment as I too am a westcountry girl (from the North area), now living in Wales, although I'm in South (west ish) Wales. I originally moved here with my ex husband about 15 years ago as I knew there was no way of being able to affford to get on the property ladder at 'home'. I now live alone with my son in a house I've been renovating over the past 18 months.

I can completely empathise with how you feel. I have never felt 'welcome' here and have always been viewed with suspicion and have felt like an outsider. I even experienced what I can only describe as racism when I first moved here. I moved to a different part of the area 18 months ago and had to go through it all again! I don't have anyone I would call a friend here and even the neighbours have only just started to acknowledge me in the street so I do feel extremely lonely at times.

I dream of going 'home' but, like you, not sure how I could ever afford to do so with the price of properties at home. When I do go home to see family, the area has changed so much that even that seems unfamiliar to me and I'm not even sure it's home anymore... it's such a strange feeling!

Perhaps we should form an ex-pats club! :rotfl:

Good luck with finding some new activites to do. Hope they help you to feel more settled.

[Deleted User]

I felt at home in a village outside cowbridge but even in cowbridge it was hard. I went to yoga in cowbridge week after week and was never made welcome in the cliques there. Llantwit major is better but tbh anywhere west and north of the vale is not welcoming


blackcurrant cake was gorgous, I can see me making that again and in the meantime I do have 11 portions to freeze. I think I can reduce the sugar content

[Deleted User]

so I gather that I am not the only one feeling quite rootless, moving around has done many of us no favours. My roots are hardly here, it is all superficial, although I must say that the people are very friendly, kind and inclusive but sometimes to the point of smothering. In my case I have to be between daughters but also independent as either could move and I would not want to hold them back. I hang onto my hobbies for dear life, they are my means to common interests but at the end of the day, who really cares, only family does


I own up to base feelings of loneliness too, although it is masked by being busy and also appreciating that there are many working people who would love to be in my shoes

MeandO

Blackcurrant cake sounds lovely Kittie. I absolutely love baking, I really would like to get back into it, athough it invariably means only I eat the cake as my son is a fussy eater and I really don't have many other people in my life to share it with. I also try to keep my grocery costs down to essentials and would love to lose weight.

Rootless is a good way of putting it. Yes, I feel quite rootless. I also lived in London for a time and never felt the exclusion that I have experienced here.
As a single Mum with no family or friends to reply on for childcare I ufortunately don't find a lot of time for hobbies these days, but I do try and keep busy. I can't abide sitting around or being bored. My little boy keeps me happy and entertained too. Without him I would have probably retreated back to living with my parents long ago just so as not to feel so alone in the world. Not that I could have stuck that out for long though, as much as I love them...!