Do they owe me for the unwanted gift?

Sarastro

Serendipitious wrote: »

In your case, you can adjust the gift budget accordingly, and give a smaller gift this Christmas.
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I agree, although we usually budget about £30 / person for Christmas...but that's beside the point - your thoughts are good.

Sarastro

Ames wrote: »

We're trying to help you get your consumer rights.
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But I don't have a problem with my consumer rights..

armchairexpert

It was a gift, and you should suck it up and give her the difference in money back. If she could only afford £36/month she's not exactly wealthy.

However, I think what's going on here is that you feel hurt. You're clearly happy to have her stay with you but she refuses to kennel her dogs, making the whole thing harder and more expensive - and you may even feel that she's choosing her dogs comfort over yours, which would be a valid reading. You were willing to work around that and give her a generous Christmas present so that she could come and visit you anyway. And now she's deciding she doesn't want to come and see her son after all, and your generosity goes completely to waste.

I'm not surprised that you want your money back. It's not buying what you thought it was buying, which was a week with your mother. But I think you still have to accept that it's gone. I'm sorry.

getmore4less

Sarastro wrote: »

The owners don't have an obligation to do anything. I don't owe them anything because it's cancelled; they are free to rent the property out as they wish, or not.

This is where the law comes in, the penalty needs to be a genuine estimate of loss, 30% may be excessive for such a transaction and the time to the use of the property and may not be enforceable.

if they do re let then there has been no loss and should refund(less reasonable expenses).

[Deleted User]

Do you know why she wants to cancel? It's worth knowing to figure out the consequences of your decision. If she's having money troubles it could be tough only giving her back 1/2 of what she's paid.

EmmyLou30

I'm struggling to get my head round all the figures being thrown around but if the cottage is cancelled and you lose the deposit....your Mum pays half and you pay half. So that may mean you owe her a few quid back if she's overpaid her half of that deposit so far. As for the rest you say well that was your xmas present - not your fault she chose not to use it. Yes it's money down the drain but you still say well that was your gift and your choice not to use it.

pphillips

My view is that I would find out whether the cottage is going to be rented out for the period that I cancelled - If it is then I would refuse to pay because the owner is simply not entitled to double recovery. If they have not rented it out at all for that period then I would want to know what attempts they have made to rent it out to see if they have done enough to mitigate their losses. In any event I would always ask for evidence from the owner.

Now concerning your mum - a gift is a gift and you cannot take it back, however as detailed above you may be able to either reduce or eliminate your losses.

rach_k

If you don't get any of the deposit back, I would split it 50/50 with your mum. Then if the cottage was an unusually large Christmas gift as a one-off, just don't give her a gift this year (or get her a small token gift to open). If you would normally spend more than your half of the deposit on her, spend what's left on a gift. I wouldn't be paying half of the deposit and still buying her a full gift as well.

maman

armchairexpert wrote: »

It was a gift, and you should suck it up and give her the difference in money back. If she could only afford £36/month she's not exactly wealthy.

However, I think what's going on here is that you feel hurt. You're clearly happy to have her stay with you but she refuses to kennel her dogs, making the whole thing harder and more expensive - and you may even feel that she's choosing her dogs comfort over yours, which would be a valid reading. You were willing to work around that and give her a generous Christmas present so that she could come and visit you anyway. And now she's deciding she doesn't want to come and see her son after all, and your generosity goes completely to waste.

I'm not surprised that you want your money back. It's not buying what you thought it was buying, which was a week with your mother. But I think you still have to accept that it's gone. I'm sorry.

This probably explains some of the rather strained responses from the OP. Even the maths doesn't add up for me.


Personally I'd just give the money back to my mum and suck it up but OP seems to want some recompense despite knowing his mother is hard up in which case I'd split the deposit between us and give the mother back her 'overpayment'. I'd also contact the owner and say that if they manage to re-let the cottage then I'd be looking to have the deposit back when I'd give the mother the rest of her money.


That's the easy bit. What OP really needs to do is look at why his mother changed her mind and whether this intransience over pets is spoiling the relationship.


I am sympathetic. My grown up DD used to stay over with us occasionally, especially at Christmas, until she got a dog. I accepted the dog visiting but insisted it stayed out of the kitchen and dining room at mealtimes (as DD would feed it from the table). Now she just comes for a few hours at a time and the dog stays at home. I did feel hurt that the dog had priority but I can live with it.

FBaby

Personally it would depend on the reason why she is cancelling, ie. she has a good reason, or you've fallen out, then I would just accept the situation.

If however it is because she's decided to go on another holiday with a friend instead, I would expect her to pay the full deposit.