“Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.”

WannabeFree

GeorgianaCavendish wrote: »

Sounds like a great weekend Wannabe
Your diary and a couple of others have really opened my eyes to how expensive all the school related stuff is! And so much seems to be asked for at the last-minute, as though every parent is able to conjure up £20 by the next morning. I hope at least this money goes towards something good at the school.

My friend was asked this week to contribute £25 per child for Xmas gifts for teachers/TAs. She's got 3 kids at the same school so £75 altogether! Her kids are in classes of 30 and each class has 1 teacher and either 1 or 2 TAs. It seems so ridiculously over the top to be splitting £750 per class between 2 or 3 staff members, I'm all for giving small gifts to show appreciation but this seems crazy to me :eek: :eek:

It's scary writing it down what it adds up too. Especially now there's the 3 of them there. School is my biggest expense (apart from rent) But its more than other bills/food shopping etc. Shocking really!

I have to say I don't donate to the teacher gifts If I could afford that I'd spend it on the smalls first We bake a cupcake/biscuits and thank you notes/make cards. I do feel bad sometimes being the odd one out but I can't keep up with the others.

GeorgianaCavendish

Don't feel bad about not donating, I wouldn't donate out of principle! I'm sure your presents are appreciated much more than a cash collection (which seems a bit soulless to me). I don't know if my friend is going to do it either, I've been telling her not to!

joeyjimbles

Heartily recommend either Matalan or Dunelm for furry blankets. The Dunelm 'Teddy Bear Fleece' ones have matching cushions, are really cosy and warm, and wash well (after the first wash where if you buy a bright colour you'd be advised to wash separately - fortunately I did....this time!)
We have a big house (lots of doors) and it's old and rather draughty, and these make all the difference to an afternoon or evening on the sofa with a good book or films.

And when the DSs were in primary and junior we always made homemade gifts. Fortunately our contributions to the cake stall were always in demand so I'm fairly sure they were well received, but for all I know they could have chucked them in the bin. But they didn't have to give them house room or feel guilty for donating them.

Family members were and are teachers and there are several boxes of 'world's best teacher' mugs and ornaments in cupboards - they really appreciate the sentiments, and love the cards, letters and pictures - but I know they feel bad about the amount of stuff they are given. And the expense.

One aged relative was downsizing when we lived in another city and she kept sending boxes of unused gifts for me to give to our charity shops as she would have hated anyone thinking she wasn't grateful if they'd found stuff in a local shop. She taught for 36 years - you can imagine how much stuff there was.

Toni'sfriend

Hi W
I don't think you're the odd one out. I think you're the one brave enough to say no to this madness. I am absolutely horrified at some of the things I'm reading.
Nice fleecey blanket sounds lovely.

WannabeFree

Confession time.

£33 spent on Xmas gifts for smalls. Damn! I've gone over the 4 gifts now However I don't feel bad well just a little bit :rotfl: We have plenty to donate to the foodbank, we have enough to manage still Still shouldn't have done it.

Need to buy an Xmas card for Mum & Step dad from me. Then I'm done. I need to stop looking at hotdeals

beanielou

GeorgianaCavendish wrote: »

Sounds like a great weekend Wannabe
Your diary and a couple of others have really opened my eyes to how expensive all the school related stuff is! And so much seems to be asked for at the last-minute, as though every parent is able to conjure up £20 by the next morning. I hope at least this money goes towards something good at the school.

My friend was asked this week to contribute £25 per child for Xmas gifts for teachers/TAs. She's got 3 kids at the same school so £75 altogether! Her kids are in classes of 30 and each class has 1 teacher and either 1 or 2 TAs. It seems so ridiculously over the top to be splitting £750 per class between 2 or 3 staff members, I'm all for giving small gifts to show appreciation but this seems crazy to me :eek: :eek:

Well , I would be unpopular as I would just say no.
I dont have that kind of money.
I used to give a nice mug or whatever when DS was at primary.

amanda_p

I don't often post but feel your frustration at the teacher's present giving scenario. As the recipient over the years of many of these gifts can I just say it is the homemade ones that mean the most. The homemade card covered in glitter and dripping with glue to the message thought about with care ,written inside with a leaky biro ! The homemade biscuits/cakes that the child has made at home which take time and effort.
I have also experienced the gift where all the parents clubbed together one year and gave me an obscene amount M & S voucher. I understood the thought behind it but felt very embarrassed about it.
It is the child with the big eyes gazing at you with their gift made at home with love and appreciation, worrying that you would rather receive a flashy, sparkly offering that parents rushed out and bought.
No they wouldn't, all these years later I can still remember the cards and those little faces, and the beaming smile when they realised that actually homemade is OK.
It is something else that has got out of hand. Send your smalls in with their gifts made at home, believe me they will be appreciated more than you will ever realise.

Toni'sfriend

What a lovely and sensible post, Ananda.
I hope all parents will take on board what you've said.

WannabeFree

I also say no Beanie Most do seem to do it though.

Thank you Amanda, that's reassuring. I think I'm lucky that the small's love to take things they've made. DD had an amazing teacher last year and today I noticed she has DD's gift from last Xmas and end of year up in her new classroom this year. DD is hoping she gets that teacher next year when she moves up (Teacher went from teaching Y1 to Y3)

HairyHandofDartmoor

It seems insane to me to ask parents to give such a lot of money towards teachers' gifts :mad:.

When my DC were at school some parents would give flowers or chocolates to the teacher, but many didn't and it was very much up to the individual parents.

No one was pressurised into giving. I am another one who would have said no to donating £25 per child :eek:. I would have told them that I couldn't afford to give that amount.

If you lived in a mansion Wannabee you could probably afford to pay a painter to do all of your painting :rotfl:.