Poison pen letters

Gingernutty

Do not confront the author of these letters. It could escalate badly.

Ring 101, make an appointment with CAB or, take a solicitor's advice.

Callie22

OH's father used to send us poison pen letters. OH called the police non-emergency number and logged the letters, fortunately we moved shortly after and he no longer has our address, but having logged the letters with the police we could have taken it further if we had needed to. I would suggest a call to 101 should be your first port of call.

andygb

Thanks for all the reponses folks, I will try to answer the various questions.
I have not had a conversation with the person concerned for nearly two years, but the last letter was received six months ago.
The person in question does not socialise at all and has never had a partner.
The person is vindictive (for no apparent reason), and in the distant past, when confronted verbally, simply put down the phone or walked away.
The person is very controlling and definitely lacks empathy and social skills.
Their behaviour has become more erratic with age.

LandyAndy

Interesting that all posters, who expressed a gender, assumed the poison letter writer was female.

Pollycat

andygb wrote: »

Thanks for all the reponses folks, I will try to answer the various questions.
I have not had a conversation with the person concerned for nearly two years, but the last letter was received six months ago.
The person in question does not socialise at all and has never had a partner.
The person is vindictive (for no apparent reason), and in the distant past, when confronted verbally, simply put down the phone or walked away.
The person is very controlling and definitely lacks empathy and social skills.
Their behaviour has become more erratic with age.

I guess it's the recent conversations with your other relatives that's kicked this off as its 6 months since you received the last letter.

What do they think you (collectively) should do?
Evidence of malicious letters to 3 people will (I'd have thought) carry more weight with the police.

How much damage can this person do to you if they don't socialise?

Comms69

andygb wrote: »

I have been the recipient of five malicious letters from one of my relatives over the past six years.
In most cases, poison pen letters are from an anonymous source, because the senders are not stupid enough to make false accusations about others, leaving themselves open to possible legal action. However, the person sending these letters often acts in haste and is deliberately callous, as well as being a habitual liar.
I have in the past week, found out that two other relations have also received what we now describe as "howlers" from this person. The result is that the person responsible for these letters (and also verbal communications where lies have been spread) has lost the friendship and trust of the three people concerned, and their families.
I have scanned all the letters which I have received, and so have the other recipients.
All the letters I received also had an element of blackmail in them, something which I ignored, because it was based on falsehood.
I want the letters to stop, and I want the person to stop telling lies to other relations about myself and my OH.
Bearing in mind the sender of these vile letters doesn't think they have done anything wrong, how do I go about this?

Are you suggesting this is harassment?


Outside of that, I can only assume it's a malicious communication.


In both cases the police are not going to charge on a first report. Have you actually told this person to stop?

Out,_Vile_Jelly

LandyAndy wrote: »

Interesting that all posters, who expressed a gender, assumed the poison letter writer was female.

Based on historical precedent unfortunately.

I would pool information with the other recipient. You may wish to consider alerting other family members in case they start receiving them too.

Your response depends on the frequency and level of distress they cause you. Are they distinctive enough to be burned unopened?

andygb

Out,_Vile_Jelly wrote: »

Based on historical precedent unfortunately.

I would pool information with the other recipient. You may wish to consider alerting other family members in case they start receiving them too.

Your response depends on the frequency and level of distress they cause you. Are they distinctive enough to be burned unopened?

I actually contacted the latest two recipients a few years ago, to warn them, but at the time they thought the sender was a wonderful, kind person, a view which they have since corrected. The person in question has a knack of coming across as being very generous and kind - overly kind in fact.
I have found out that the sender was spreading verbal lies about myself and my OH to other relations, something which the relations up until this point in time, were taking at face value. This resulted in some relations who I had previously had a good relationship with, becoming a bit off with me.
From what I have learned over the past couple of weeks, it sounds as though the sender may have moved on to other people, and is spreading malicious gossip about them. If the sender is challenged then they send letters out.
The sender has never been in a relationship before, and has never worked with others as a team. The sender has also boasted of hurting people before, seeing nothing wrong in reducing people to tears.
Both I and my OH have asked the sender, verbally, to stop sending these letters, but that request has been ignored.

pimento

Presumably you have their address?

Don't open them, just cross out your name and address, write the sender's name and address on the envelope and send them back.

AylesburyDuck

andygb wrote: »

I actually contacted the latest two recipients a few years ago, to warn them, but at the time they thought the sender was a wonderful, kind person, a view which they have since corrected. The person in question has a knack of coming across as being very generous and kind - overly kind in fact.
I have found out that the sender was spreading verbal lies about myself and my OH to other relations, something which the relations up until this point in time, were taking at face value. This resulted in some relations who I had previously had a good relationship with, becoming a bit off with me.
From what I have learned over the past couple of weeks, it sounds as though the sender may have moved on to other people, and is spreading malicious gossip about them. If the sender is challenged then they send letters out.
The sender has never been in a relationship before, and has never worked with others as a team. The sender has also boasted of hurting people before, seeing nothing wrong in reducing people to tears.
Both I and my OH have asked the sender, verbally, to stop sending these letters, but that request has been ignored.

Reading all that it sounds like the sender has mental health problems.
I'd be at least lodging a complaint with the police, and continue to do so if more arrive, it may result in at least a warning of harassment for them. And if the Police do think mental health may be involved (which hopefully you may have helpfully mentioned) maybe they will look into if this person could be a danger to others or themselves.