Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally

elizabethhull

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

DH has come back from a meeting and sold well, he may have just saved Christmas :T. We got some other money in this morning which will cover December's mortgage, so that's transferred into the mortgage account :T. The selling he's just done should cover December's bills, once the customer pays . DH has done well .

Now I just need to shift this headache.

Wonderful - at just the right time too !

HairyHandofDartmoor

elizabethhull wrote: »

Wonderful - at just the right time too !

Yes it's perfect timing .

HairyHandofDartmoor

We're watching 'A Christmas Prince The Royal Wedding' tonight. We saw the first film last year and this is the sequel. It's cheesy and slightly awful .

daisy_1571

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

@Carboot Mrs Fussey is a fabulous name. When I was a child our neighbour used to polish her garden gate, wash her nets every week and turn her stair carpet around every six months! She should have been called Mrs Cleans Too Much but wasn't .

She sounds like she was related to Mrs Cleans-her-railngs !!!

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

@Daisy They call you Mrs Fiddles With Her Washing :rotfl:.

:rotfl::T:rotfl::T:rotfl::T it seems so obvious now !! :rotfl::T:rotfl:

Daisy xx

beanielou

This thread is mad in the nicest possible way

daisy_1571

beanielou wrote: »

This thread is mad in the nicest possible way

Agreed:p

Daisy xx

daisy_1571

Hh

I'm sure you have already thought of this but is there anything lying around that could be sold for other people to use for their xmas presents? Local Facebook selling pages or gumtree are easy and you might just have something lying about unused that is just what someone else is looking for. Your boys often have you looking through bags and bags of rubbish some of which you take to the charity shop - could they be sold on instead ? even for a few pounds? Once you are more affluent (which will happen) you can always give a donation to the shops if you feel bad about depriving them just now.

Also have a look on those websites there for any cheap stuff you might be able to use (or sell on). Gumtree is likely to have a 'free stuff' page if you search for it and someone might be just grateful to get rid of household stuff you could use ie the storage shelving systems etc you would like. I regularly search my area and it's amazing what people just want rid of. You could perhaps count that as your xmas pressies between you and oh. Plus weren't you looking for something for one of your boys to replace drawers he broke? Just a thought.

I was also thinking about the money you're getting as digs now. I reckon I would approach it with my percentage system. Back when we were skint and needed stuff but also wanted stuff and wanted to start paying off our mortgage I drove myself mad trying to spend every penny twice and rethinking strategies all the time. Eventually we came up with the percentage system. If we ever got any extra money (for birthdays or xmas or worked a wee bit of (terribly scarce) overtime) etc we decided to allocate it 25% to one thing, 25%to another, 25%to the third and the last 25%was split as personal pocket money to each of us. Over the years the percentages sometimes changed as things were cleared or priorities changed but it was easy to deal with under the system. And it meant we always had at least some money for ourselves to spend on whatever we wanted even if only a pound or two. We applied the system to all monies be it a fiver or a rare 60quid overtime etc. Eventually it made a difference.

I only mention it as your dig money sounded like it was completely unexpected money and unless you can start saving something for the yearly bills that regularly throw your plans out you won't feel you are getting ahead at all. Firstly I would pretend you only have the £80 you would have asked for. That's one weeks shopping paid for that you didn't have before. Perhaps a few pounds of the £120 left could be allocated to the next car tax due so you have 5 months worth of those savings to help towards that (or that extra bit might help you get the full 12 months the next time and save the extra they charge you for only getting 6months). Another few pounds could be saved towards getting some fleece or other material (an ad on gumtree or Facebook might also get you some free unwanted material) which will help line your curtains or make rough draught excluders for squashing against the bottoms of doors and ill fitting windows - draughts are the biggest source of feeling cold after dampness. Any material can be used for stuffing these or lining the curtains so check out the clothing/bedding/household stuff (like towels or downie covers) on any sale rale on your Saturday saunters rather than the book shelf? Doesn't really matter if the colours aren't to your taste, they will be behind the curtains and downie covers are a huge piece of material.

It must be tempting to try to pay off things I know, i really do, but it's also really important to begin to plan for the expenses coming up. The car has been identified as something very important to keep going.

I agree as well with whoever said to get a list of upcoming things so you dont misremember things like the mot date etc. You can use excel or an old diary or just a list and keep adding to it as you remember birthdays, occasions, Bill's (car tax, car ins, house ins, TV licence, car mot, car servicing, 12monthly dentist appt, new glasses due, boiler contract, Christmas, anniversaries or new baby due who will need a pressie etc) once you have a list it is easy to maintain it.



That's the practical stuff I was thinking of today for you. On the emotional front - Well done on the counselling, that must have been hard to go through it, be told you have lots of issues but not be 'bad' enough for them to help. You did so well tho, Elizabeth's post was lovely, print it out and look at it each day till you feel a bit stronger.

Daisy xx

Plonter

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

My DH and I have been in debt for 34 Years, apart from brief periods, ever since I was offered my first credit card at the tender age of19.

Our debts were caused by us being impulsive spenders and not being very skilled at budgeting or managing our money, so we know it is our own fault. We always believed that one day we would have more money, mysteriously, and that this would bail us out .

Our full light bulb moment came when we realised, "What if we never have any more money than we do right now?"

A couple of years ago we were coping with the minimum payments, but didn't have enough to overpay on any of them. We were forking out £1300 a month in minimum payments, and the interest alone was £1000 a month :mad:.

But then in 2015 our small business started to bring in less, and a family bereavement, and illness affected our ability to work. We could no longer afford the minimum repayments and we were scared we would lose our home. We were stricken with stress and depression .

Step Change shone a light in the darkness for us and they arranged for us to make token payments of £1 a month to our creditors. This saved our sanity and we were reassured that our home was unlikely to be taken from us.

My DH recently turned 55 and drew out his pension so that we could make full and final offers to our creditors. All but one accepted an offer of 50% of what we owed (which is all we had to offer). We are continuing negotiations with the final creditor and hope to be debt free by Christmas :T.

Being so close to being debt free has made me realise what a heavy burden the debts have been all these years, like living our lives wearing lead boots.

Once we are debt free we will still need to live very frugally because we have no emergency fund or savings, and our income can be irregular. I hope that starting a diary will help to focus me on frugal living, avoid impulsive spends, and keep my spirits up. Because frugal living can be a lonely and isolating experience.

This site and Step Change has helped me so much, and I hope that my diary will help to inspire others that it's never too late to change your life .

So inspiring.

Cherryfudge

It's been a big day, HH. I hope you're safely tucked up in bed now, recovering. Well done to your DH for bringing home the bacon.

Elizabeth, thank you for such a lovely post.

[Deleted User]

Daisy, I've mentioned the idea of selling stuff to HH before. Like you said, she likes to donate to charity and may not like depriving them but there are other ways to support them. After all, HH, you buy books and things from them and that's income they didn't have before.


When my debts were at their terrifyingly highest I had to resort to selling anything I owned that wasn't nailed down, sometimes things I really didn't want to sell:eek: but I just had to just to do such 'normal' things as put a meal on the table every evening or feed the cat. I was recently having a cull of old paperwork and buried at the bottom of a box was a list of things I might be able to liquidate for 'survival' money. I must have had a real brainstorming session as the list was massive:eek:. Made me feel quite weepy when I recalled those desperate times:o.


I don't 'do' Facebook myself but am a big fan of Freecycle and I recently recommended to HH to look on there and place a 'want' ad when she was looking for something, I think it was when her laptop died. I've donated lots to people on there in the past (when I wasn't so mind-bogglingly skint) especially in response to 'wants' and have also requested a printer when mine died and received a brilliant all-in-one machine with a full set of brand new inks too, the brand ones not the cheapie generics that I usually buy:j.. Obviously Freecycle isn't the answer to making money but you can save a fortune there.


I love your percentage system, very clever and something I might try to adapt to my own use:T:beer: