Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally

HairyHandofDartmoor

teafor2 wrote: »

Morning HHD I think those emotions are to be expected. We always raise a glass to absent friends and family before our Christmas lunch and sadly every year there seems to be one more on the list

It sounds like you've had a lovely relaxed Christmas and I'm sure having all your DS's with you was the icing on the cake.

Enjoy your party, a family get together is the perfect tonic for lifting spirits. _party_ xx

Thanks TF2 . Yes I think special occasions are bound to cause sadness and I don't think that will ever change, no matter how much time passes. Some people are so special that you will never get over losing them.

It was lovely to have all the DSs with us at Christmas .

Sun_Addict wrote: »

I think Christmas makes us think about those no longer with us. I have many fond memories of my mum and they tend to come to the fore this time of year. I’m glad you had a nice couple of days with your boys and your stepdad.

Hope you enjoy your get together tonight

Thank you SA . Yes Mum's are too special for us to ever stop feeling sad that they're not with us on special occasions.

[Deleted User]

HHOD,I agree with all you said so eloquently about the missing of loved ones, especially our Mums. Special occasions always cause sadness and always will but the raw pain of it lessens gradually over time. I think we'll always remember them with tears in our eyes but also with gratitude that we could share so much with them over the years. You got through this one, HHOD:T:beer:, now onto the next hurdle of New Year's Eve which I always find is a time for a lot of reflection which usually makes me feel very emotional. I'm an optimist by nature and love the idea of New Year and starting a whole new chapter with so much in store and, hopefully, nice things to look forward to. When Big Ben strikes I still dissolve into tears though:o


I hope your family party went well and was fun. Was it just your own immediate family (DH and your sons) or other relatives too?

HairyHandofDartmoor

Our Christmas family party went well. All the family who live locally attended so ten people came and even DS2 put in an appearance . DH and I felt very tired when we were preparing for the party and tired during the party, but we're glad we had it nonetheless because we enjoyed it and it's good to get the family together in one place.

The house is looking spick and span now after our big clean up for the party :T. I cleaned the window and blind in the bathroom before the party as it was looking dusty and revolting. I also washed the shower curtain, washed the bath mats, cleaned the toilet and cleaned the toilet floor, washed the bath and the tiles around the shower, emptied the kitchen bins (again). DH bought some party food (we didn't need much as we had plenty left over) and hoovered everywhere. We had to find and wash various large bowls and plates that we only use for parties and have a good tidy up everywhere :A.

You can see why we feel tired today! We have a ton of food and drink left over as everyone brought some, so we can eat from the cupboard and fridge for a few days. At least DH and the DC can. I'm back to my healthy eating today after four days of eating chocolate, mince pies, cake and other unhealthy food :eek:.

I've already put the dishwasher on twice, hand washed some delicate plates, put some towels on to wash and tidied up after the party. Now I feel bored, but I'm too tired to go out anywhere :mad:. DH is also too tired to go out today. I'll have to try and read a book to force myself to relax. TV just doesn't hold my attention in the daytime.

I've got lots of plans for the rest of the week when we've recovered our energy. There are two NT places we want to go to before they take down the Christmas decorations and I need to go to the shops and buy a new diary. I also have two assignments to do this holiday.

I hope everyone had a lovely Christmas and doesn't feel too flat today.

HairyHandofDartmoor

Finally_Solvent wrote: »

HHOD,I agree with all you said so eloquently about the missing of loved ones, especially our Mums. Special occasions always cause sadness and always will but the raw pain of it lessens gradually over time. I think we'll always remember them with tears in our eyes but also with gratitude that we could share so much with them over the years. You got through this one, HHOD:T:beer:, now onto the next hurdle of New Year's Eve which I always find is a time for a lot of reflection which usually makes me feel very emotional. I'm an optimist by nature and love the idea of New Year and starting a whole new chapter with so much in store and, hopefully, nice things to look forward to. When Big Ben strikes I still dissolve into tears though:o


I hope your family party went well and was fun. Was it just your own immediate family (DH and your sons) or other relatives too?

Thank you FS . Yes I am very grateful that I had my Mum for 54 years and it's because she was such a lovely Mum that I miss her so much. Christmas has been got through but you're right that the new year is another big hurdle. We always spent New Year's Eve with my Mum and stepdad and we currently have no plans for it. I know I will feel very sad at going into a new year and a new decade without my Mum. But a new year is a time for new plans and positive change so it's a time of mixed feelings.

foxgloves

It is difficult HHoD, but I found that this Christmas, we were celebrating nice festive memories of Mum & Dad, rather than just feeling the empty gaping hole. So we played one of my Dad's compositions - one that I hadn't heard before so that was really nice - & admired all the lovely decorations hanging on my sis's tree which Mum made. We also played card games we have played as a family since we were children & generally shared memories. It was minor, very insignificant things that brought me up short this year. For example, on our way home, Mum & Dad would always leave first thing, whereas we'd be much more leisurely & set off much later. That meant we'd always call in at theirs on our much longer journey home for a loo break, coffee & biscuits, etc, & it suddenly felt so odd this year to reach that stretch of the motorway & not just take the slip road off to the village I grew up in.
It is what it is...... as the saying goes, 'the only two certainties in life are death & taxes'........ but I know what you mean. The times when we all used to get together for special celebrations like Christmas are definitely the hardest. Memories can be kept alive though, & are very precious.
F x

beanielou

Glad that the party went well.
Happy to send you a diary.
I got one for Christmas and I won’t use it.
It has a pen with it

jwil

Glad you had a good Christmas, and your party went well

elizabethhull

foxgloves wrote: »

It is difficult HHoD, but I found that this Christmas, we were celebrating nice festive memories of Mum & Dad, rather than just feeling the empty gaping hole. So we played one of my Dad's compositions - one that I hadn't heard before so that was really nice
- The times when we all used to get together for special celebrations like Christmas are definitely the hardest. Memories can be kept alive though, & are very precious.
F x

FG : Do you mean you played a recording, or you played it yourselves ? What type of music was it - and how wonderful to find a piece you didn't know.

HH: your plans for organising next year sound excellent, we shall be cheering you on to succeed.
I did all my wrapping on the 23rd and designated elder daughter's bedroom as a wrapping station. That certainly prevented the untidy piles all over the dining-table & floor. I don't know why I didn't think of it before, tbh - with the old pasting-table, paper, sellotape and scissors, I could sit there and just get on with it.

We were 6 for Xmas and for the first time ever watched some tv and a DVD on Xmas Eve. We watched 'Arthur Christmas' and 'The Tiger who came to tea', they were both utterly brilliant in different ways.

Willowtree222

Sounds like a mixture of reflection as well as making new and happy memories. Christmas is always a time to think of loved ones, and there is always bound to be sadness around it, but it does sound like you also managed to overcome this and enjoy it as well.

Your Christmas Day sounds lovely. A mixture of nature and family.

You're very brave with boxing day. I wouldn't normally even think about going out on boxing day (other than to the pub).

I hope you have a good few days of recovering as well as enjoying yourself. xx

[Deleted User]

Morning Hairy,

I'm happy you had a lovely Christmas and wow to the party (very brave) glad it went well.

Love your plan for next Christmas, I haven't been as organised as I normally am, so may borrow your idea.

Special times are difficult when a loved one has died. My dad was like a child at Christmas and even now although he's been gone 18 years, it does ache but I laugh at remembering his antics when we were growing up xx