early 40s and not fabulous at all

EssexHebridean

Too many of my clothes aren't fit for the charity shop by the time I reach the stage of deciding I'm done with them Uncanny! Although I did better on that one with the last clear out as a lot of the stuff had to go due to not fitting rather than just "worn out" which is my usual reason for replacing clothes!

Did the weather (and in turn you) cheer up Plush?

Tea&Kittens

I had a big charity purge fairly recently. I've got a couple of posh dresses I had for weddings, I really should try and get something for them! Quite nice actually having some space in drawers and wardrobe!

I hope you managed to have some fun times over the weekend plush. I can empathise with you, having been on my own for what seems like an eternity! Don't know about you but I tend to go through phases with feeling all alone.

Former_MSE_Andrea

Great thread plush, you're in this week's email.

We're looking forward to seeing how you get on!

Take care

Andrea

EssexHebridean

Oh excellent Plush - you're DFW diary of the week in the MSE email! :T (of course this also means that the appalling state of my cloths has now become wider public knowledge! :rotfl:)

UncannyScot

Well done plush

Tea&Kittens

Great stuff, Plush!

Plush

Apologies for the lateness of my response. I'm back - with capital P - don't ask, some things are better left unsaid. I almost abandoned the diary but decided to force myself to continue so here I am.

Thanks for including me in that weekly email, I'm not sure it's an honour though

Not much to update, have been good about not spending since my last post. Well, apart from groceries, this week's shop was £67, God knows what's on that receipt. One of these days I shall post my Ocado receipt on here, open to critique.

Oh, and didn't run the 5k, but was close, almost 4k. Getting there... slowly but surely.

What else? I decided to try OK Cupid and so I registered and filled out a profile. 3 days later, I've got too many (useless) messages on it. Talked to one guy who seemed normal and is sort of local, only to find out 2 conversations later that he's actually married looking for fun on the side. Luckily, I didn't give him my phone number. Oh, and someone offered to do my pedicure, now that was a first. :rotfl:

That's pretty much it for now... thanks for bearing with me.

117pauline

Hi Plush

Good on you for returning when you didn't want to.

I am a great believer in looking at the emotional and psychological reasons for why we overspend.

Are you tired / Fed up / need cheering up / feel you deserve it...... etc etc

Your work days sound very long so I imagine you are tired and hungry when you get home. Do you menu plan to avoid top up shops?

I know you have said you aren't going to look at your past spending but that will be where the answer lies. It's horrible to go through receipts and credit card statements but how about telling yourself this is your way of facing up to the situation and building a great future.

Be gentle with yourself. Do not let the negative devil on your shoulder shout awful things in your ear. Yep, you have made some mistakes but you are going to change from now on. Small steps, tiny ones if they need to be.

If you have some products around, plan Project Plush. Use up the body lotion, creams, bubbles or whatever to take time to cherish you.

Good luck, keep your eyes on the prize
Pauline

Tea&Kittens

Glad you came back, Plush! I know it's not easy on your own, trying to do all of the things!
I've been there with OK cupid too - I have phases where I'll try it out, then I get a bit fed up and leave it a while. I've also tried one called Bumble, it's a little tinder-like with swiping, but it's the girl who has to initiate contact if you're fed up with nonsense messages! (it is free)

Make sure you have time for you, to do something you enjoy. Or to just not do anything at all
Coming from a similar-ish situation, I've found some of the mindfulness stuff which is out there quite useful, may be worth a look?

take care of yourself! xx

Plush

117pauline wrote: »

Hi Plush
Are you tired / Fed up / need cheering up / feel you deserve it...... etc etc

All of the above. I know that I have it easier than others. I'm healthy (some issues but nothing major - hypothyroidism that is under control, taking pills), I have a wonderful child, I have a job that pays decently, a roof above my head, and family and friends. I do have debt but I'm not in a situation that cannot be solved. Yet, I feel like I'm drowning and things are going downhill, and it's not just a a feeling, my credit card balance went from £0 to £14K in several years and I seem to be unable to reduce it. I even thought about adding the debt to the mortgage. (or selling to pay debt and get something smaller).

And no, I'm not meal planning, in fact I'm quite bad about wasting food...

On budgeting and spending, I manage to not spend for a couple of weeks then it all comes back. Lack of willpower, it's called.

Tea&Kittens wrote: »

Glad you came back, Plush! I know it's not easy on your own, trying to do all of the things!
Make sure you have time for you, to do something you enjoy. Or to just not do anything at all
Coming from a similar-ish situation, I've found some of the mindfulness stuff which is out there quite useful, may be worth a look?

Thanks. Will go back to yoga, it was silly of me to stop that. I'm trying to find a cheaper class though, and one that fits my schedule.