No presents - is that really tight?

kethry

My own family isn't large (me, OH, mom, dad, 2 grandmothers to buy for - from me, anyway) and most of the initial "kids" are grown up now.. i know mom cut a deal with her in-laws when i was little that she would buy their presents for me from them, and they would buy her presents for their kids from her... as we've gotten older that's transferred to the children of the cousins, except where the cousins haven't gotten children, and then they still get a present.

of the family i give presents to, they understand that we're hard up (living on benefits) so don't expect a great deal from us. However, i go for the maxim "I may be cash poor but time rich" (as i don't (can't) work) so my presents are tailored accordingly. For example: last year i made one of my grandmothers a lap quilt, this year i'm doing her a family tree all nicely written out and framed, with information in a wee booklet on some of her ancestors. Although this will have cost me a certain amount of cash, the majority of the effort has been time - and this is recognised by my family, and they feel touched accordingly. When it comes to presents to us from say, my mom and dad, who have a bit more money than we do (i.e. cash rich time poor LOL) they give things that they know we need/strongly want. For example, money towards a lawnmower, or seeds for the veg garden. it seems to work well - putting the thought in, with whatever resources you have - no resentment on anyone's part.

I know not all families are like that but.. its a thought.

HTH

keth
xx

LouBlue

shopaholictiedtheknot wrote: »

I really do not want to go to the hassle and expense of buying gifts for everyone this year, I do not see the point as everyone I buy for asks me what I want instead of just buying a surprise and I end up trying to rack my brains for novel ideas for them as they will never say what they want! My other reason is I am trying for a baby and want to save every penny I have so I can take as much maternity leave as possible (no-one knows about this and I want to keep it secret!)
I want to suggest to everyone that we don't buy gifts this year just nice cards but will everyone think I am scrooge re-incarnated?

:rolleyes:

Not at all. We all came up with this idea last year. We only have a small family but with kids etc involved, it still does add up. So we buy for the kids only but still get Secret Santa presents for everyone, the value of £5, really silly embarrassing presents. It is the highlight of the day! Worst bit is actually going up to the till to pay for it, my sister gave me something but then ran out of the shop whilst I was paying for it cos she should thought she would wet herself she was laughing so much. :rotfl:

It really is the thought that counts and just spending a lovely day with my family is worth so much more than how much we have spent on each other. It will be the first Xmas without my mum this year, which shows me even more, how presents mean nothing at all and its people that count.

David_B_2

shopaholictiedtheknot wrote: »

I really do not want to go to the hassle and expense of buying gifts for everyone this year, I do not see the point as everyone I buy for asks me what I want instead of just buying a surprise and I end up trying to rack my brains for novel ideas for them as they will never say what they want! My other reason is I am trying for a baby and want to save every penny I have so I can take as much maternity leave as possible (no-one knows about this and I want to keep it secret!)
I want to suggest to everyone that we don't buy gifts this year just nice cards but will everyone think I am scrooge re-incarnated?

:rolleyes:

Welcome to my world!

My son (2.5 years), nephew and niece get presents but nobody else. My wife and I normally treat ourselves in the sales instead. Bothers and sister, parents and grand parents do the same after we agreed some years ago to not waste the money on tripe.

Works well and means we aren't all feeling crap and skint on boxing day neither ;-)

And no your not scrooge, not just yet anyway.

thanksalot

Home made gifts? Inexpensive and show you thought of them?
If you're not a foodie, try a apge of scrapbook with pictures from the year.
You could follow it up in future years?

shopaholictiedtheknot

Have done the first one and went well my friend said no probs! :T

LouBlue

shopaholictiedtheknot wrote: »

Have done the first one and went well my friend said no probs! :T

Well done, stick to your guns, I am sure everyone will be fine with it, and secretly relieved, most people wish they had the nerve to say it first. Nothing wrong with splashing out a bit on birthdays, but Christmas, you have to buy for so many people, it really puts people in so much debt for the new year.

morganb

I'm going to have to suggest something similar to my family this year; it struck me the other day that we had last seen 3 lots of relatives this time last year when we were exchanging Christmas presents, how daft is that???

LouBlue

morganb wrote: »

I'm going to have to suggest something similar to my family this year; it struck me the other day that we had last seen 3 lots of relatives this time last year when we were exchanging Christmas presents, how daft is that???

Extremely.

mitchlouise

The only prob is that maybe its quite late? I know i've bought a lot now and if my mate said no presents this year i've already spent our £20 budget.

However we have children only x-mas with my Dads side of the family and it works really well...

morganb

I know what you're saying, I went on a mad spree in the January Sales so there's no way I'm not giving presents this year ... but I have a feeling things might be different next year!!!