Parental opinions needed for a college project!!

Savvy_Sue

Of course, this isn't a lot of help to Emsywoo, but this early sexualisation has been going on for a LONG time.

When DS1 was 7 or 8, I saw a new family magazine in the shops and bought it a couple of times. It had a lot of competitions in it, and ideas for days out, that kind of thing.

However, when I bought Issue 2, I was gobsmacked to see an article in which a 9 year old girl was given a makeover so she could look like her mum. Nail varnish, lippy, eye makeup etc. So I wrote to express my feelings - I wrote nicely, I thought, but firmly.

The letter I got back was SO rude. Clearly I knew NOTHING, my children were repressed, the makeup had been very discreet, and this little girl had been SO happy with her makeover that basically it couldn't possible be wrong.

That's one reader they lost then ... and I don't think that magazine lasted much longer than issue 2, so maybe I wasn't the only one who voted with her purse. I like to think not.

Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with young girls 'playing' with mum's makeup, but for the mum to ask and the magazine to collude with turning a little girl into a grownup was just not on for a family magazine.

vix2000

Hi Emma
mum aged 51 3 daughters now 27, 24 and 16 (no boys).

at risk of also seeming a prude, (as earlier poster), It is self respect in my opinion. Many girls nowadays grow up with no rules or guidelines. Some parents encourage them to answer back to teachers and other figures of authority. As they have no respect for anyone else they can't be expected to have any for themselves.

As with the rest of you I am appalled at the clothes made for small girls to wear, and laugh at bras for 5 year old. Whatever happened to the word 'No'. My girls, as all of us did, wanted totally inappropriate things at times. Various piercings, tatoos, clothes, etc. The answer from me was the same as my mum said to me. Not while you're living in my house. Luckily so far we have no tatoos and the only piercings are the ears.

Childhood lasts for such a small time these days. They see so much on TV and hear so much at school. I watch programmes like Ibiza uncovered, and all I can think is 'whatever is their poor mum and gran thinking?' My girls say that they wouldn't dare cos their grandad would kill them if I didn't first!!!

All we can do is bring them up with decent moral values , lead by example, and teach them to respect themselves and others, and hope for the best. I always told my kids that coming home pregnant is the least of their worries. You don't die from being pregnant you do die from aids.

I also think kids comics should be strictly regulated, as I've read articles about comics aimed at 10-13 yr olds talking about varioue sex acts that I'd never heard of at that age. I dread to think what it'll be like when my 2 year old granddaughter grows up.

OK OK so I'm a grumpy old woman. Rant over. Hope it helps, Emma. Good Luck with your project.

vix2000

Hi Emma
mum aged 51 3 daughters now 27, 24 and 16 no boys.

at risk of also seeming a prude, (as earlier poster), It is self respect in my opinion. Many girls nowadays grow up with no rules or guidelines. Some parents encourage them to answer back to teachers an other figures of authority. As they have no respect for anyone else they can't be expected to have any for themselves. As the rest of you I am appalled at the clothes made for small girls to wear, and laugh at bras for 5 year old. Whatever happened to the word 'No'. My girls, as all of us did, wanted totally inappropriate things at times. Various piercings, tatoos, clothes, etc. The answer from me was the same as my mum said to me. Not while you're living in my house. Luckily so far we have no tatoos and the only piercings are the ears. Childhood lasts for such a small time these days. They see so much on TV and hear so much at school. All we can do is bring them up with decent moral values and teach them to respect themselves and others and hope for the best. I always told my kids that coming home pregnant is the least of their worries. You don't die from being pregnant you do die from aids. I think kids comics should be strictly regulated, as I've read articles about comics aimed at 10-13 yr olds talking about varioue sex acts that I'd never heard of at that age. I dread o think what it'll be like when my 2 year old granddaughter grows up.
OK OK so I'm a grumpy old woman. Rant over. Hope it helps, Emma. Good Luck with your project.

anewman

"favours for a fiver" - makes me feel like I missed out on something, lol.

mummy_Jay

Hi,

I'm early 30's, mother to 3 year old boy.

My view is, we should look to the role models for young girls, Kate Moss, Linsey Lohan, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, all of these women are renown for being out of there face, sleeping with anything with a pulse and wearing next to nothing. I've been racking my brain for a young female role model that has got themselves a really bad reputation and I can't think of one, but I sure there must be one. (Though I's like to think if I got a daughter it would be someone more like Gwen Steffani she'd look up to).

Then you go to kids cartoons, and Bratz comes to mind (I'd like to point out as a 33 yrs old I find it very funny), it does have strong females but they are still not exactly running around as little girls instead they are mini adults running after boys.

I'm not bothered about the playboy thing, I remember when I left for uni my dad brought me a set of play boy bed covers and gave them to me with the wise words, this better be the closest you ever get to being a center fold. LOL.

I also agree dressing a 5 year old as a mini sexy symbal isn't right but then again, I hate it when I see babies/toddlers with earings, to me its one of those things that should be there choice when they are big enough. Children should be allowed to be children but each mother makes her own choice for her child.

I'd also say when a girl gets to her late teens I have no problem with them wearing clothes of there choice as long as they have the self respect for their bodies and the ability to take care of themsleves, the question is how to teach our girls to respect there bodies and it's not just abusing their bodies with drinking, sex etc but starving themselves to reach an unhealthy image he media has given them of the ideal woman. I also don't think the new wave of pop/dance music videos in the last few years that have taken the brains out of women and made them back into just decoration. With even the female artists in some cases making women look like braindead meat, thanks fergie!

Talking music I may have a decent role model how about Pink, at least you get the feeling there is a young lady that thinks for herself and can look after herself.

We have also got ourselves in a vicious circle as these teenagers/ young women running around doing this stuff our becoming mums and teaching there children to be as they were.

But for the time being its up to the parents to teach there daugters to value themselves, not to follow the crowd and think for themselves. And if I get a daughter in the future I will be in rolling her in martial arts at a young age, teach her to climb trees, fix cars and hope she can learn from me to think for herself.

Sorry for the semi rant, I get a bit anoyed wih these things

snowmaid

Very early 40's, mother to 20 year old daughter, 19 year old son, 9 year old son.

As parents we need to take a stand against the media and 'fashion' industry and protect our children against the sad lack of morals and decency, all in the name of equality.

I have said before that women think they are so 'free' and 'equal' in being able to scr*w any person they like and boast about it, in the meantime, all these girls/women are doing is taking any respect the female may have left.

We need to be mothers to our children, not friends. We are there to show them right and wrong and protect them. Our protection may not be popular and may be resented at times, but as they grow they will learn that we protect because we love them.

With Councils promoting pole dancing classes, allowing children to get abortions without their parents knowing etc, we as parents are facing an uphill struggle to protect our children.

When I look at the laws, fashion industry, etc and what is being promoted for children, I cannot help but wonder if there are paedophiles pulling the strings in the background somewhere!

missk_ensington

I'm a 22 year old mother one one son, aged 3.

Is it not BECAUSE of feminism that women behave in this way? I.e, on the misapprehension that the foundations of feminism permits them to emulate men, in a mans world. We have been encouraged to go to university like the men, vote like the men, work in industries previously reserved for the men.....so it should come as no surprise that it is now acceptable to have sex like the men.

And would this thread be any less shocking if we learned that it was highlighing a rise in men who are adopting lewd, undignified and sexually explicit behaviour? Probably not.

I am not condoning the behaviours listed, I personally think that ANYONE degrading themself in this manner is unacceptable and show a lack of self respect, but I extend this sentiment to the male species in equal part to the alledged "fairer" sex. Why should it be socially acceptable for men, but not women?

In conclusion, I think feminism is to blame. Women now have their own money, jobs, homes, independence (and quite rightly so). Icons such as the "Playboy" trademark epitomises 21st century women having that right to do the same as men (personally I just think its tacky).

My concern for my son is that he will grow up not to respect himself, or female partner as respect in general becomes dilluted out of society

missk_ensington

vix2000 wrote: »

I always told my kids that coming home pregnant is the least of their worries. You don't die from being pregnant you do die from aids.

:rotfl: If I ever have a daughter I'll remember that one! :rotfl:

dee_mum_of_3

im a mum of 3 boys 1,11 and 7-we collect the eldest 2 from secondary school and the girls coming out are so well groomed and pretty its unbelievable they are immaculate white teethed straightened hair and look so glam its sad to see them like this i think somehow in the midst of all the aggression and hostility these day children are missing out on a childhood all they have to aspire to is big breasted super glam popstars when i was 11-12 i wanted to be like my best friends big sister i dont recall emulating a female in any way of course i wanted to marry jason donovan and had a kylie dress with braces but i didnt want to be her -this playboy thing is way to much i cant help but think would it be as acceptable if boys were to carry around readers wives rucksacks? not having daughters myself probably doesnt give me a fair impression i know but my sons girlfriends often come round and raid my makeup and clothes its all to much to soon and i suppose as a mum you either let them follow the trend or stop them and make them different .....id like to think id think up other options such as a sports label instead of playboy......it made me sad when a 13 yr old confessed to me shed had sex already and her mum had taken her for an injection so she couldnt get pregnant i said to her what you gave away to someone you hardly new was special you cant get it back...she said she knew and wished she hadnt done it I said make the next time special so she said oh its ok now cos i cant get pregnant .....now i question the mothers motives was it to safeguard her daughter or was it to save hassle for herself? either way theres a child of 13 who gave away a precious part of herself and now has noself respect .....am i old fashioned? do i live on another planet? i teach my eldest son if a girls willing to do it with you dont flatter yourself how many others has she done it with?..........

dee_mum_of_3

We need to be mothers to our children, not friends. We are there to show them right and wrong and protect them. Our protection may not be popular and may be resented at times, but as they grow they will learn that we protect because we love them.


that is my sentiments exactly