Credit Score 000

I'm_not_going_into

Placitasgirl wrote: »

As you appear to have taken sensible steps in making contact with Step Change I'm really not sure what you hoped to achieve by posting on a public forum. As others have said your original post didn't pose any questions and therefore opened the door for comment and advice, which to be fair you seem to be seeking.

With mental health issues I don't think opening yourself up like this is helpful at all, particularly if you take other peoples thoughts, and what they perceive to be helpful comments and advice to heart.

I'd suggest asking that the thread be closed/decline to respond to any further posts and wish you luck with both your debt and health challenges.

What exactly have you 'actually' contributed by posting this reply just out of interest? The original post mentioned nothing about asking for advice, and I certainly didn't post regarding asking advice regarding StepChange??

I have just had another look at the original post and not once did I place a question mark so obviously no advice needed.
I just saw you even put 'no need to be embarrassed' so why come back with what you've just said?

Thanks for all your help though

dazzaofdagenham

Think I was much like yourself ten years ago...

Living life with credit was a natural way to go, food and bills on a credit card and then a life changing event comes along and wham it all goes to pot and you don't want to do.

I can't offer much in the way of advice except keep your chin up and always look forward.

I'm_not_going_into

dazzaofdagenham wrote: »

Think I was much like yourself ten years ago...

Living life with credit was a natural way to go, food and bills on a credit card and then a life changing event comes along and wham it all goes to pot and you don't want to do.

I can't offer much in the way of advice except keep your chin up and always look forward.

Thank you! You honestly don't know how much that means to me!

Placitasgirl

I'm_not_going_into wrote: »

What exactly have you 'actually' contributed by posting this reply just out of interest? The original post mentioned nothing about asking for advice, and I certainly didn't post regarding asking advice regarding StepChange??

I have just had another look at the original post and not once did I place a question mark so obviously no advice needed.
I just saw you even put 'no need to be embarrassed' so why come back with what you've just said?

Thanks for all your help though

I'm sorry? I most certainly didn't say that you've "no need to be embarrassed"; although I don't think you do. Please check your facts before slating me for something I didn't say. I actually wished you luck with your debt and health journey, which I meant sincerely. I think I contributed to the post by suggesting that if you didn't like the responses you were getting and were taking them to heart perhaps it was time to close the thread and save yourself the stress and anxiety of reading things you clearly don't accept and don't want to see or hear. It's called "trying to be helpful and supportive".

You're right; you didn't use any questions marks in your original post, so didn't ask any questions. So what is exactly is you're looking for?

I hoped that my "actual" contribution to your post was constructive and supportive. Yours seems to be bad attitude and incorrect and unfounded criticism of me. Please read my post again (I am Placitasgirl) and get your facts straight. And if you can't accept input from others without being offensive, don't ask for it on a public forum. And finally please take your own advice about "no nasty comments", they're simply not necessary.

I'm_not_going_into

Placitasgirl wrote: »

I'm sorry? I most certainly didn't say that you've "no need to be embarrassed"; although I don't think you do. Please check your facts before slating me for something I didn't say. I actually wished you luck with your debt and health journey, which I meant sincerely. I think I contributed to the post by suggesting that if you didn't like the responses you were getting and were taking them to heart perhaps it was time to close the thread and save yourself the stress and anxiety of reading things you clearly don't accept and don't want to see or hear. It's called "trying to be helpful and supportive".

You're right; you didn't use any questions marks in your original post, so didn't ask any questions. So what is exactly is you're looking for?

I hoped that my "actual" contribution to your post was constructive and supportive. Yours seems to be bad attitude and incorrect and unfounded criticism of me. Please read my post again (I am Placitasgirl) and get your facts straight. And if you can't accept input from others without being offensive, don't ask for it on a public forum. And finally please take your own advice about "no nasty comments", they're simply not necessary.

I really apologise, I mis-read who had said about no need to be embarrassed. We are all human, humans make mistakes sometimes.

But as for attitude? 'I need to get my facts straight' I made a mistake I'm sorry for that.

I cannot see anywhere though where I have slated you. I even put thanks for your help at the end (this wasn't even a sarcastic comment).

Placitasgirl

Thank you for your personal message and apology; much appreciated.

PixelPound

I first mentioned living beyond your means, and that was purely about the credit card. If you have an interest bearing card, especially one like Aqua who are not known for reasonable rates, where you can only afford the minimum but end up owing more than the previous month as each month goes on especially if its just used for everyday living (from the comment about it being for essentials) then it's a ticking time bomb. It doesn't matter if you were both working with a household income of £2k per month, £10K per month, or even a £100k per month, using a card for essentials and not been able to pay it off so that next month you owe more than last month is living beyond your means.

If your husband hadn't lost his job, would that £4300 have continued to rise? When would it reached £5K or £10K? Would servicing it (pay the minimum) meant the rate of increase would have kept increasing? When would aqua decide to sell it on to a DMC?

Maybe you don't acknowledge this, in which case if it affecting your mental health then maybe it isn't a good idea to carry on replying or even reading it.
Just think, you now have a plan to get rid of your debt, if you stick to it, then you will get out of it - all the stress and worry should reduce because there is an end in sight. It doesn't matter how far. You aren't the first to have to resort to a DMP, and won't be the last. There is life after a DMP as I'm sure many will let you know. Just keep focused on the present, not the past.

Sparx

OP ignore the people just winding you up. Chin up and just look forward and try remedy the situation the best you can. Look at the bright side, I'm sure you have your health and a loving family?

Have you tried done yourself a SOA (statement of affairs)?
See link here: https://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php

If you do one and post it up, us outsiders (MSE folk) may be able to give you an idea where your spending or bills could be improved?

I'm_not_going_into

Sparx wrote: »

OP ignore the people just winding you up. Chin up and just look forward and try remedy the situation the best you can. Look at the bright side, I'm sure you have your health and a loving family?

Have you tried done yourself a SOA (statement of affairs)?
See link here: https://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php

If you do one and post it up, us outsiders (MSE folk) may be able to give you an idea where your spending or bills could be improved?

Thank you Sparx, I have just had a look at the SOA you've put the link up about. I don't think I'm quite ready after putting a bit too much info about debts etc on this thread I can go there just yet lol!
The form looks very much like the one StepChange did with me over the phone when I initially called them. But I promise over time I will do this and put a thread up about it. I may have to post and run though (I'm joking right now) :rotfl:

Thanks again! x

I'm_not_going_into

nic_c wrote: »

I first mentioned living beyond your means, and that was purely about the credit card. If you have an interest bearing card, especially one like Aqua who are not known for reasonable rates, where you can only afford the minimum but end up owing more than the previous month as each month goes on especially if its just used for everyday living (from the comment about it being for essentials) then it's a ticking time bomb. It doesn't matter if you were both working with a household income of £2k per month, £10K per month, or even a £100k per month, using a card for essentials and not been able to pay it off so that next month you owe more than last month is living beyond your means.

If your husband hadn't lost his job, would that £4300 have continued to rise? When would it reached £5K or £10K? Would servicing it (pay the minimum) meant the rate of increase would have kept increasing? When would aqua decide to sell it on to a DMC?

Maybe you don't acknowledge this, in which case if it affecting your mental health then maybe it isn't a good idea to carry on replying or even reading it.
Just think, you now have a plan to get rid of your debt, if you stick to it, then you will get out of it - all the stress and worry should reduce because there is an end in sight. It doesn't matter how far. You aren't the first to have to resort to a DMP, and won't be the last. There is life after a DMP as I'm sure many will let you know. Just keep focused on the present, not the past.

Nope I take on board everything you have said and I'm greatfull of the advice. I/we definitely acknowledge the debts etc but funnily enough it isn't the debts that cause my issues (they don't help but they haven't caused them)

It's crazy to say really, but I think we are proud that we have acknowledged them now after maybe a little too long and are making the necessary steps with StepChange.

Oh!! I can guarantee 200% that once we are debt free (haha this forum is starting to rub off on me) that we will be MUCH more careful with money in the future! I think maybe we needed to hit this low to be able to take a step back and see what wrongs we've been doing with money over the years!

Thanks again! x