Spouse unhappy with bequest to my sister

jackyann

Definitely look at some of the suggestions on here about your financial affairs.
Regarding your basic decision, I would reflect on your general relationship with your wife, and hers with your sister. If you think this is a reaction out of shock & grief, could you give it a couple of weeks, and ask her to consider carefully what you wish to do and why. Ask her what she would wish for you to do, and both discuss your feelings.

I hope that you have some sort of specialist nurse caring for you who can suggest some counselling about this if need be, it is not uncommon in your situation.

I hope that helps you to decide what sends you out of this word feeling the best that you can, and act accordingly. I think you will be able to arrrive at something that helps you both, and I wish you peace.

HB58

I am so sorry that you are going through this, it must be terribly hard on you and your wife.

People do act out of character when facing the loss of a loved one, I suspect this is behind your wife's behaviour (especially as she gets on well with your sister).

If you can talk this through and try to get at the real reason for your wife's objections, then that might help. However, ultimately, you might have to decide whether to accede to your wife's wishes or do what seems best to you as I guess you want to know that your will has been dealt with.

I do hope that you and your wife are able to put this matter aside and enjoy whatever time you have together.

Marvel1

Wife is showing her true colours - greed.

Make sure your will is left with a solicitor and not wife.

Smiley_Lady

Dear Rotan
I am so sorry to hear about your terminal illness. We should all put our affairs in order when ever we have any asset of value. I was executor for our Dad's will, not a great task. I will never do it again - the greed of my 2 younger siblings horrifed me. I now live full time in Turkey so have empathy for your sister's choice of lifestyle. (I don't work - would be thrown out of the country!)
However - it is your money to do as you wish.
Your wife sounds incredibly greedy!!
If your sister is a beneficiary in your will she will not pay Inheritance Tax but if you give her money before you die she will, as it is over the allowance you can donate each year and will be included in your estate for Inheritance Tax. If you leave your sister £40.000 your wife will still inherit a very substantial sum. Whatever your sister does with it, is her choice.
Good luck with your decision and I hope you find peace in your remaining time. Big hug xx

badmemory

I don't think that your wife is being greedy, I think she is in panic mode. She is having to face the possibility of you dying & on top of that upheaval she is worrying about the roof over her head. Just give her time to think things through rationally & be reassured that she will be financially secure. Is it possible that she is focussing on the financial because she can't face the reality of your illness?