Spouse unhappy with bequest to my sister

Rotan

Hi,
Am terminally ill with cancer and have about 6 months.
Busy putting affairs in order. Am married with no children.
House worth £520,000 with 40k mortgage.
My pensions worth £420,000.
Wife has £200k pension and earns £48k per annum.
I am 54 wife is 49.
I have a sister who earns £6K per annum,
and is single. Owns mortgage free flat and lives from hand to mouth.

Wanting to do the right thing by everyone I decided to leave everything to my wife except: 40k bequest to sister amd 3k to a charity close to my heart.
Wife's gone ballistic and said sister shouldn
't get anything and money should go to her (she gets on fine with sister)
Shocked me to tell you the truth.
Would welcome your impartial comments
Thanks

Oakdene

Your choice.

IAmWales

Why does your sister earn so little?

Mojisola

Rotan wrote: »

Hi,
Am terminally ill with cancer and have about 6 months.

Wife's gone ballistic

It's not unusual for someone to act out of character when they are facing the death of their loved one.

It's your choice what you do with your money and it's kind to think of your sister. The only thing I would consider is whether she is getting benefits that would be stopped if she inherited 40k from you.

Rotan

Lives in greece. In common with a lot of others she works summer season 6 months and then signs on. Greek socoal decurity cut to about £300 per month. Greek minimum wage is a pittance

Mojisola

If you have the capital available now, you could give it to your sister.

That way, it's done and dusted and won't be part of your will.

Your wife may be fearful of the future and reacted out of character.

Rotan

Rotan wrote: »

Lives in greece. In common with a lot of others she works summer season 6 months and then signs on. Greek socoal decurity cut to about £300 per month. Greek minimum wage is a pittance

About £160 per week

IAmWales

Rotan wrote: »

Lives in greece. In common with a lot of others she works summer season 6 months and then signs on. Greek socoal decurity cut to about £300 per month. Greek minimum wage is a pittance

For me I wouldn't be giving money to someone who chooses to live in an unsustainable situation. I might be more inclined to support her in moving somewhere that she can earn a living wage.

With regard to your wife, you're not leaving her short, and if she does want more she could choose to downsize and free up some cash. Her reaction sounds more than panic than ill will.

Malthusian

Mojisola wrote: »

The only thing I would consider is whether she is getting benefits that would be stopped if she inherited 40k from you.

Means tested benefits wouldn't stop me giving a loved one £40,000. £40,000 is enough to buy a car, move out of a dead-end town, clear their credit card debts and even study full-time for a degree. Even if them inheriting £40,000 results in them receiving £40,000 less in benefits over the course of several years (a bit unlikely) it doesn't make it worthless. If they waste it then that's their choice.

OP - you certainly aren't going to get anyone telling you that you shouldn't leave money to your sister, based on the facts presented. (*edit* Ok so IAmWales kind of has, but they are suggesting supporting her moving elsewhere, which is still giving her money, just with conditions attached.) Your choices are either to talk to your wife and try to persuade her to understand your decision, or ignore her and go ahead and rewrite your Will / gift the money to your sister. Impossible to say which without knowing more. (The other choice is to obey her wishes and leave her everything but if you were going to do that you wouldn't be here.)

Mojisola

Malthusian wrote: »

Means tested benefits wouldn't stop me giving a loved one £40,000. £40,000 is enough to buy a car, move out of a dead-end town, clear their credit card debts and even study full-time for a degree. Even if them inheriting £40,000 results in them receiving £40,000 less in benefits over the course of several years (a bit unlikely) it doesn't make it worthless. If they waste it then that's their choice.

I would ask the loved one if they wanted it before imposing it on them.

Red-Squirrel_2

Does your wife have any siblings she cares about? Putting herself in your shoes and imagining what she'd want yo do for them if she was terminally ill might help her understand your motives.

End if the day though, it's up to you, your wife will have more than enough and your sister will probably be very moved and grateful that you thought of her.