Help and advice needed

Nerissa17

Thank you, we will discuss where we go, we are a small family, hers and mine is all that's left, so it will be a big fallout, and I know she actually needs help.

StopIt

Nerissa17 wrote: »

Thank you, we will discuss where we go, we are a small family, hers and mine is all that's left, so it will be a big fallout, and I know she actually needs help.

She wont get help until she is shown that what she is doing is wrong.


Showing the impact her behaviour has, and why it requires police involvement should at least start her on the way to realising that she cannot do this. Again, why should you pay for her actions?


Any fallout is not on your head frankly. Do not blame yourself for this, and know that by getting this dealt with that you are indeed helping her more by doing so than burying this and taking the hit yourself.

Candyapple

See post 11 on this thread for what you need to do:
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5650944

Don't forget that her children/anyone else whose name has been used will need to follow all the steps as well, so please print out/show them this thread so that they can protect themselves also.

You are also going to have to contact the credit reference agencies individually and make sure that no address links have been set up on your files and to get them removed.

Sometimes you need to be tough in order to help someone. I would have no hesitation in going to the police if a family of mine did something like that. Please don't feel guilty, it's not your fault.

Lungboy

Nerissa17 wrote: »

she forgets it's not in her name

I very much doubt this.

MEM62

Nerissa17 wrote: »

she also has a young daughter that I have to consider. No you don't. Her daughter is not your responsibility. Your fist responsibility is to yourself. Would it be so easy for you to report it? Yes, I would report it in a heartbeat. I know she's done wrong, I know all this. It's just not that easy to report her. Yes it is

Nerissa17 wrote: »

I know she actually needs help. Which she will not get while you won't deal with the situation.

You are sacrificing yourself and your financial future for this woman.

Nerissa17

Thank you everyone for your replies and advice.
I will discuss it with her daughters and go from there.

Geoff1963

I think the key might be to address whatever it is your relative is spending ( your money ) on. There are support organisations for most of them.

Experian has a Credit Alert service ( £15 / month, I think ) which gives a weekly statement of any credit activity. That might be quick enough to cancel applications within their "cooling-off" period.