Boy meets girl

System

Without closure its hard to let go but you did get closure.

After about 6 months I knew that things were coming to an end… and then they did like a guillotine, a light switch was flicked and it was over. I spoke to her and she looked at me with complete contempt and said “Go away, leave me alone”, “… but I’m never going to see you again” and she just walked away.

You obviously werent listening.

*max*

I'm so confused. As I understand it, this was years (and years!) ago, and you never even had any kind of relationship with that girl, just a massive crush (lust)? You weren't even friends? And she was clearly a massive a-hole, making fun of you in a really mean way?

What. The. Actual. F. ?

Wake up, man. Go and kiss your ACTUAL, REAL, LIVE girlfriend who seem to still like you despite your ridiculous hankering for something that never was and never would have been anyway. Honestly...

The_all_new_me_2

I’ve had a really long hard day but I want to make one thing absolutely and unequivocally clear, I have no wish whatsoever to get back in contact with this woman. I was looking on Google to find out about the issues, I wouldn’t have the first clue how to find her as she must have had the most generic name in the UK. Besides the answer to my problem doesn’t lie with her but with me and that doesn’t change if its been going on 10 years or 25 years. Its very easy to say “pull yourself together you big wuss and get over it” and its the sort of thing I’ve thought many times in the past when hearing other people problems but until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes its impossible to understand what they’re going through.

“you obviously weren’t listening”. She completely got her wish. What still gets me to this day is the callousness with which everything transpired. “I’m really flattered that you like me but your not my type” etc Why so obviously hurt someone?

Artytarty

WhyL? Because she was a heartless biatch, that's why!

The_all_new_me_2

As has already been said a number of times I don't have the skills to write this in a way that people can understand it in the way I do and as this went on for over 6 months its hard for me to convey all that went into giving me this issue.

I do think that a huge part of the problem is that although she never explicity led me on she maybe didn't mind having this bosotted bloke making a fool of himself over her in front everyone. She'd slap me down every so often but she fluttered her eyes at me far more often.

I think if I'd been able talk ie she'd talk to me then I wouldn't be where I am now and I've always blamed myself for that.

ani*fan

Hi there The All New Me

What you've experienced is called unrequited love. It's painful, anxiety provoking, and lots of other difficult emotional things. It's also quite dramatic and you seem to be pining for the drama rather than the girl who you really didn't know her very well. There's a limit to how deep even a full on 6 month relationship can be. Time's the thing, and you and this girl didn't have much at all. But I bet you never felt so alive in all your life when it was happening. Exciting stuff.

I'm guessing you're a lot older now, and your 20-year-old self needs a bit of your current wisdom and maturity. When you're 20, with raging hormones and in a new place where no-one seems to like you, I wonder what purpose this unrequited love had for you? This girl wasn't very nice so why would you hang around her? Doing so did not do you any favours, it didn't help you make friends, be more liked or settle in to your new home or anything positive at all. Your behaviour towards her sounds a bit creepy and odd, I wonder if you are the weird stalker in her life story? Whatever it was that went on, it wasn't helpful to you. I hope you can see that.

Sometimes things are hard to forget, but thinking about this from a different angle might help you do exactly that. If i were you I'd dig out some old photos of when I was 20, remember everything that went on before and after this incident, think about how far you've come in life and all the people who love you now, and be EXTREMELY glad you're not 20 any more.

System

There are 7 billion people in this world and half of them are sheilas

PeacefulWaters

MatthewAinsworth wrote: »

There are 7 billion people in this world and half of them are sheilas

Ever so slightly more than half.

The_all_new_me_2

ani*fan, Saw your post about 10 minutes after you posted it. Been thinking about it since yesterday. Want to respond but am somewhat on the back foot at the monent. I should have time this evening though.
Thanks.

Mr_Singleton

same
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