Workplace relationships

20aday

OP I know what you mean about it 'doing your head in'.

I've been single for the last five years and wasn't on planning on changing that. There's a colleague at work who made me 'light up' whenever I saw them/spoke to them.

Wasn't sure if they were being friendly or were interested. It did my head in and I made the first move and they weren't interested.

Fair enough. Despite their behaviour (I've mentioned it on here) suggesting otherwise even if they were that ship has well and truly sailed!

Err on the side of caution... once bitten, twice shy etc. Am not trying to rain on your parade but if she's just being friendly it might make things awkward it between you.

Guest101

Malthusian wrote: »

Of course not, the policy would be "if you fall in love with someone you work with then either you have a platonic relationship or one of you finds another job". Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm under the impression that romantic relationships are banned in the army and other jobs where you don't want someone to prioritise their love over their job. They can't stop you falling in love, but any employer can ask you to find another job if your ability to do it is compromised.

If they're in different departments and this isn't the army or a business with Chinese walls or any other issues I really can't see the problem. There is nothing intrinsically wrong with workplace relationships, and with the demise of arranged marriages, it's how a lot of people meet.

Uhm? Im not sure where to start, but no you aren't correct.


An employer cannot just ask you to find another job, dismissal after 2 years must be fair.

hazyjo

I'm obviously in the minority at my workplace. Some couples have literally sat in the same small office.

I have a very close male friend who I chat to by my desk daily, rarely about work. More likely about property. Of course we're there to work, but we're not machines and we are 'allowed' to have conversations with people when not busy. I often don't have any work to do.

onomatopoeia99

Malthusian wrote: »

Of course not, the policy would be "if you fall in love with someone you work with then either you have a platonic relationship or one of you finds another job".

A policy like that would fall foul of article 8 and lead to a successful unfair dismissal claim if the employer tried to invoke it.

Everyone gets the right a private life, who you have relationships with is none of your employer's concern, unless you're caught at it in the stationary cupboard.

Fireflyaway

I'd leave it. Could end badly and completely ruin your time at work. I've seen it happen a few times and ultimately one party left as they couldn't stand it anymore. Worse case you could lose respect / friendship of colleagues and just find it really awkward.

LEJC

Oh well...here's me very happily married to the workplace romance of many,many moons ago....

Initially we never went out of our way to publicise or to hide...we worked for a company that one of us could easily transfer to another office so after a while thats what happened.

Izadora

Fireflyaway wrote: »

I'd leave it. Could end badly and completely ruin your time at work.

Or it could all go brilliantly and you could end up happily married. Only you can decide whether or not it's worth the risk.

Fireflyaway wrote: »

I've seen it happen a few times and ultimately one party left as they couldn't stand it anymore.

You also have to look at the possibility of one of you leaving even if things work out. Quite apart from not wanting to spend pretty much every waking moment together, my OH changed jobs when we moved in together as we didn't like the idea of two wages coming out of the same company. We could cope with one of us being made redundant but not with both of us out of work at the same time.

Threebabes

I met my husband at work, been together 24 year, married 20. We continued to work together for 10 year until I left work. We werent the only couple that worked together in a largish engineering company.

I would go for it, ask her out for a coffee.

owen_money

If shes fit I'd give it a go