Adventures of the Boy & Me..

Chandelier.

UncannyScot, I definitely would save a heck of a lot by giving up. I've still some fags left so I'm going to completely quit tomorrow and get my mum on board at the same time. The only aspect of smoking I enjoy is the social aspect, half the time I don't even enjoy it. It's just a habit and a hard one to break. I'll do it cold turkey as I don't want to keep the nicotine in my system. I'm not in work now until next Friday so I've plenty of time to try and get the worst of it over.

The party the boy is attending is a set of twins from school. I've ummed and aahed whether to get both boys something and have decided I'm going to get a card for each and put 7x £1 in each of them in the shape of a number 7. I got this idea from my auntie last year who did it for the boy and I think it was just enough. I know some may say don't buy for each twin but I know the mum well and she's a lovely person.

I'm not sure what we will do the rest of the day as it's wet and rainy. I may do some baking with the boy. I've a cracking cookie recipe. If anyone ever wants it then just ask. It makes them taste like the ones you buy from millies. Yum yum.

Anyway I best to get ready.

louby40

Good for you quitting smoking.

My friend had an app on his phone which showed how much money he was saving each week by not smoking- like uncannyScot says you could put that money into an account for a holiday or something special.

I've never smoked but I can see the difficulty in giving up!

Chandelier.

Thanks Louby. I think I'm going to do just that. We do have an upcoming holiday next year which I need to save for so it's even more of an incentive to visit.

It sounds awful but I use smoking as an escape. I take that time out for me and it's the only thing I do spend money on for myself. However there are tons of other things I could buy for myself. Maybe I should write a list.

Off the top of my head I can think of..

- New glasses.
- New make-up.
- Getting my hair done.
- Spa day.
- Days out/nights away.
- New clothes (need to lose weight first).
- Holiday fund.

I'm sure there's plenty more so it anyone has any ideas feel free to share

Chandelier.

Afternoon.

I have finally got on the laptop. I have been doing a lot of thinking lately on what I would like to achieve. I know in the past I have posted things and I may not always stick to them but that's life sometimes and not everything is going to be easy or straight forward. The three big things I think about are debt, weight and my health.

Debt.

As mentioned before, the debt is not spent on wreckless things. My current debt is for the purchase of my car. The debt I shall accruing over the next month or so is for dental work that I feel will be beneficial to my confidence.

Rather then throw myself into paying off both debts, I am going to solely concentrate on one debt at a time. So my first priority will be my car debt which is spread over two accounts. I will continue to focus on the MBNA debt first whilst paying minimum to the Halifax debt. Once the MBNA debt is gone, I will then focus on the Halifax debt until the balance is zilch.

Once that is gone, I can then focus on paying off the debt accrued from having my teeth done. I've yet to receive a full quote for this but will the next time I visit the dentist. I need to discuss my options and work out what the best option is for me. Whilst paying off the car debt, I shall only pay the minimums to this until other balances are cleared then I will tackle this head on.

I am going to use a different approach then I have been doing. After all my bills come out, I will look at the surplus left and split it into three categories- debt payments/savings/spending money.

I will set aside an amount I deem suitable to pay off the debts and I will try not to make over-payments unless necessary. I am becoming far too obsessed with this. In regards to the savings, I have a holiday I need to save for so I will make a payment each month and build up a cushion again to pay for this and any other expenses. The spending money aspect will just be for days out, meals out and money to spend on myself in general should I see something I would like. If I haven't the funds available then I cannot buy it .

Weight.

I have been saying for a while that I would like to lose some weight. I really need to start making an effort because since my holiday I have put on over a stone and whenever I look in the mirror, I feel disgusted with myself.

I think I am going to follow SW but do it from home by myself. I have good enough knowledge regarding this and the groups do not suit me. I basically pay to get weighed. Ideally I would like to lose around 4 stone if not a bit more. If I reach that target I can reevaluate things and see how I feel in myself at that weight.

My motivation is my sisters wedding next year where I will be bridesmaid. I do not want to deprive myself too much but I do need to eat healthier and watch how much I am eating. The medications don't help. I need to gain back that sense of control and plan ahead for the week what I intend to eat. I stick with it better if I plan ahead.


Health.

My overall health is another big thing. I always concentrate on the state of my mental health and often forget to take care and be mindful of my physical health. One obvious aspect which I am going to tackle is the stopping smoking. I also intend to find the motivation to get back to the gym and improve my physical health through exercise. And I am also going to focus on my emotional well-being and look at coping mechanisms and ways of dealing with things.

That's pretty much everything that has been on my mind.

Chandelier.

Evening,

Today has been pretty productive if I must say.

The boy thoroughly enjoyed the party he attended and came out with a big smile on his face. Whilst he was there I went for a coffee with a couple of the other Mums which was lovely. I hardly ever see them due to not always being able to do the school run , so I very much enjoyed this.

Talking of birthdays, the boy is 7 next month. He agreed to do a day out so we have decided on Alton Towers. I have booked a hotel for an overnight stay for £65 which is close by and we will take some food with us. I've no doubt we will also eat out for a meal. This way we have two days to spend at the park and what we don't get done in day one, we can do in day two. The hotel looks absolutely lovely and children orientated. I've yet to decide what to get the boy for his birthday but I won't be spending much, I would rather give him presence then presents.

Today we have been to the butchers and stocked up on meat for the next month or two. All of the goods were portioned up and put straight into the freezer. We have also had a pizza night here tonight followed by eton mess.. yum !

So I am going to spend the rest of the night chilling out and relaxing whilst I can. I am about to wind down and start to plan ahead for the next week.

Hope everyone has a good evening.

Chandelier.

Morning

I forgot to mention yesterday when we went to Aldi, we picked up some of the packs of short sleeved shirts, a pack of two for £2.49. What a bargain.. We picked up two packs of each size so it should last the boy a while.

Also yesterday I discovered the back of my phone has a crack. I'm not sure how I've managed that as I usually have a case on my phone that is pretty indestructible. However I have used it lately without the case. It's sods law isn't it. I am yet to cancel the insurance but will do as soon as I get round to it. The crack doesn't effect the use of the phone. At least I don't think it does. If worse comes to worse, I'll just keep the insurance until the end of the year and review my options then. My contract runs of end of December/beginning of January which I'll then switch to a sim only deal. I refuse to pay the price of a contract any more. Times have changed, once upon a time a phone contract used to be a good deal, these days they are all extortionate prices. I'd rather buy a handset myself then be stuck in a two year contract.

Today the boy has his ice skating lesson. I haven't been to watch him for a while due to work so I am excited to go along and see how much he has progressed. This hobby is usually a spendy one but I always make sure there is enough money in the pot for him to do it as he enjoys it so much. His Nanny is going to buy him his next pair of Skates for his birthday.

In regards to smoking today is my quit day. I've downloaded an app to try and keep me on track and motivated. I will be doing it cold turkey as I don't want to replace one addiction with another such as vaping or NRT. I need all the luck I can get.

Later on my plans are to sort through all food in my house and work out a weeks worth of SW menu planning. I'll weigh myself in the morning and start from there. I also need to up my water intake and get my body moving. Ideally I'd like to lose 2lb a week for the first couple of weeks, if it's more then fantastic. I'll probably set myself a small food shopping allowance each week to allow for extra bits of fruit/veg. I saw a picture of myself from four years ago the other day and the difference in size was amazing. I want to be back to that.

It's time for a new chapter of my life and I need to do my best to change all aspects. As time goes on my confidence will improve and my outlook will change. I hope to pick up some hobbies and discover who I really am as I lost myself along the way. I don't want to stick with the label of the person with bipolar. I want to be seen as more then just my illness. I don't want the bipolar to define me. I want to exceed expectations and live my life again.

Have a good day folks.

louby40

I joined Weight Watchers at the end of April and I've lost just over a stone. It cost me £32 for 3 months but if you lost 10lb in 8 weeks you get 2 months back - so I've filled a form in to do that!

There is also a big Facebook support group - maybe there's something for SW too on Facebook, I need to be accountable sometimes.

Chandelier.

Reasons to stop smoking.

- It’s an expensive habit.
- It leaves me more susceptible to infections/viruses.
- It makes my clothes stink.
- It affects my taste buds.
- I want to set a good example to the boy.
- I want to improve my physical health.
- It dries out my skin. If I stop my skin will be much healthier.
- It isn’t attractive.
- It can stain my teeth.
- It’s a self-destructive habit and practically self abuse.
- I could do something more productive with my time.
- I deserve better then what smoking does for me.
- I rely on it as a quick fix during stressful times, it does not solve anything.
- It’s an impulsive behaviour.
- It makes me feel bad as a person.
- It makes me feel like an outcast at times.
- If I want to see the world improve then start with myself.
- It will enhance my pride, appearance, confidence and self esteem.
- No more yellow, smelly smoke fingers.
- My coping mechanisms will become more natural.
- My sleep pattern will improve and more time in bed in the morning.
- I can enjoy my break at work with friends.
- No more feeling foggy and jumpy.
- The thought of being nicotine free in 72 hours.
- The thought and actual self-belief that I can do it.
- Realising that recovery from such a habit is good and not bad.
- I can save up for a holiday.
- I can use the money saved for nice days out.
- I can use the money saved for paying off debt/become debt free quicker.
- I can socialise without having to smoke.

Chandelier.

Evening,

I thought I would write a list as above about reasons why to stop smoking. I am sure there are a lot more but they are the only ones I could think of.

Anyway today has been a bit of an up/down day.

The boys ice skating lesson went really well and he is looking forward to getting back to doing this properly. At the moment due to restrictions at his rink, he is not skating as much as he used to. He used to do three/four lessons a week which although it was expensive it was worth seeing his face. He still states that it is his favourite hobby and he would not want to give that up.

The boy then went off to his Dads for the weekend. Tomorrow he has beavers which both me and his nanny will attend as its the last meeting until after the school holidays and its a family event too. I'm sure this will be a fun event for all whom attend.

The boy also has a celebration assembly at school tomorrow which I shall attend. This is his second one in two weeks so I will be interested in hearing what his teacher has to say. He went all year without getting one then all of a sudden gets two in one go.. this was after I questioned his teacher why. Other kids in his class had been getting two or three awards and the boy had none. He's very well behaved at school and tries hard in everything he does so I could not understand it. The boy had no idea I spoke to his teacher so I will not burst his bubble about getting them. It is just funny he has all of a sudden got two awards. Nonetheless I am proud of him whether he gets awards or not. I just don't feel he gets the recognition for the hard work and effort he puts in at school. He gets plenty of certificates out of school, maybe I should be one of them parents who sends their kid to school with every little certificate they get in order for him to be acknowledged. The boy knows he is loved and that he makes us all proud, we reiterate this every day and when he does ask questions answer them the best way possible.

After his assembly tomorrow I am going round to my friends house for a coffee and a catch up. This should be fun. I haven't been round in a while as I have just been so busy with things. It will probably do me the world of good.

Anyway I suppose I best be off to bed! I have an early morning ahead of me.

Good night.

SpekySquarehead

There was a guy I worked with who wanted to quit smoking and he read a book about it (I'm sure there's plenty) and he managed to stop. Not a very helpful post given I don't remember the name, but the point I'm trying to make is that there are a plethora of tools out there to help you.

Think of the cash you'll save!!!!

Good luck.