Budgeting with an unenthusiastic husband

Bellisima

Like you, I am very careful with money and worry if our "social" spending gets out of hand. When you have grown up in a poor household it does make you very careful. Do you have to go to every social gathering every time? Why not just go every other time? I've recently inherited a little money, but I'm still so very careful and worry in case it runs out! I hope you find a solution that pleases you both.

pinknsparkly

I echo the views of the other responses on here.... There's absolutely no point in you scrimping and saving trying to make the most of your income if your hubby runs up a credit card bill and then you need to take out another loan to repay it. It has to be a joint effort! There will be no concept of "mine and theirs" when you are on maternity leave, his income is the only true income you'll have.


I'm in a similar situation to your mat leave in that I'm currently finishing up a PhD on no income whatsoever and my other half is the only one with income. Like you, I pre-planned to have a pot of savings to cover the time period in which I was likely to be unemployed (including time to look for a job) but we are still cutting back as much as possible to avoid having to dip into the savings any more than is absolutely necessary. It's taken a lot of effort on my part to get him there, and he still often decides he/we deserve a treat (takeaway, boozy night at the pub) but he is much better than he used to be. It's all about baby steps. Now I've got him used to taking leftovers for lunch (most days) rather than buying a Tesco meal-deal he's even accepted an offer of me doing some batch cooking to keep him fed this weekend while I'm away. Usually he'd flat out refuse and just spend the weekend ordering takeaway!


Good luck. Having a baby is going to turn your life upside down, and I certainly think that these conversations need to be had now rather than once baby is here!

enthusiasticsaver

You have made a fantastic start. The only thing I would say is when or if you have children look again at joint finances as one or other of you will be taking leave and have a massive reduced income (probably you). Your husband sounds like he is on board with budgeting though so good move to start with.

pinknsparkly

Sorry, I missed the fact that there was a second page. I wrote the above after only reading the first page!


Sounds like you're definitely on the right track! I did notice that you'll each still use your own "personal" money for lunches. I would seriously consider making your own (or taking in leftovers). In the past, switching to packed lunches from buying them has easily saved me over £100 a month :eek:

Working_on_MyTMMO

:TYou are doing brilliantly, and I'm sure you'll agree that half the battle is being aware of what you're doing and trying to achieve. Dealing with money 'off the cuff' is really not wise - especially if you're looking to having children or retiring one day! Just wondering if you use YNAB in your budgeting like a previous poster mentioned? We're getting to grips with YNAB and it seems a really helpful tool - it deals in £ Sterling and not just $ Dollars, and lots of helpful tips and videos on their website. We don't download transactions from our bank with it (although I think you might be able to in the UK) for security reasons, but also to make us aware of exactly what our Bank Statement transactions are actually doing to our overall budget picture! You're doing so well - keep it up!

NorthLondonChick

Thank you everyone for your help and good wishes xx

I've started a debt free diary on here to help track my progress and make me accountable. It's been 3 weeks so far (started on week 2 of the month)& we've stuck (mostly!) to grocery budget thus having almost £300 left over this month to put towards our house renovation fund. Plus I had £150 left over in my personal account to put towards a surprise tax bill which helped massively

Even hubby is surprised and seems to believe it'll work a bit more now. And, as expected, me having a personal budget has rubbed off a little on him as he is spending less too. Really pleased so far with the progress - hope it stays this good xx