Sister has asked me to be her guarantor

qwert_yuiop

In this case, the poster would be allowing her profligate spender sister open access to her bank account and assets. Not a good idea no matter how much she loves her.

Pollycat

qwert_yuiop wrote: »

In this case, the poster would be allowing her profligate spender sister open access to her bank account and assets. Not a good idea no matter how much she loves her.

I think that's the opinion of the majority of posters - and the decision of the OP too.

FBaby

I'm worried they will prioritise paying me back over other things that I would deem necessities just so they don't let me down.

You talk about necessities, I talked about things that are NOT necessary.

Pollycat

FBaby wrote: »

You talk about necessities, I talked about things that are NOT necessary.

Exactly!

I said 'the opposite problem' - pointing out that my sibling would go without to pay me back unlike the examples you gave.

Fireflyaway

A family member asked us the same and we said no. They already had debts and a ccj with no secure income so we didn't want to take the risk. I knew if collectors came asking for their rent we couldn't afford our mortgage too and the consequences were just too serious to take the risk. Said family member went off on one and we haven't spoken since! Makes me sure we did the right thing. A good family member would respect your decision.
If your sister just needs a roof over her head she needs to be looking to rent a room in a shared house. Something she can afford. If she cheated on her husband she could let you down too and then your husband and kids pay the price. Support her emotionally but not with money.

FBaby

Pollycat wrote: »

Exactly!

I said 'the opposite problem' - pointing out that my sibling would go without to pay me back unlike the examples you gave.

I get it! I think I would be the same as your sister. The idea of owing money to a friend/family would make me feel terrible and would rather cut down on a meal a day to repay them than having to face them to say I wouldn't be able to repay anything for yet another month.

A good family member would respect your decision.

I agree with that. Maybe being a bit upset, because if they ask in the first place, it is because they believe you should do it, but get over it quickly as respect the reasons for saying no. Refusing all communication shows they have no real awareness of their situation.

GwylimT

Surely all she needs to rent is a room in a shared house?

One of my brothers needed a guarantor a few years ago, I said no as I simply couldn't afford my own bills and his £750 rent on top. He promised everyone he could afford it, no one would pay a penny etc. My sister ended up agreeing, he paid the rent for two months, after that my brother didn't pay a penny. My sister ended up being chased for 7 months of missed rent payments and damage caused to the property, the total amount owed was almost £8000.

JReacher1

You guys all seem to have really bad brothers and sisters! I feel for you all!

Marvel1

JReacher1 wrote: »

Yes I know what a guarantor is.

I am just saying that if my sister was in need and I could do something to help them which would probably cost me nothing then I would do.

I realise I am in the minority here as nobody else would seem to be prepared to act as a guarantor for a sibling who was in need. I find it a bit sad but I suppose this is how the world is today!

I have £300 left after my own bills, if I wanted too I couldn't.

Sea_Shell

Sometimes it's not necessarily the sibling that's the untrustworthy one, but the in-law!! But they are a 'package deal'.