Teaching, nightmare.

Bogalot

Jimmithecat wrote: »

I would advise her to stick with it if she can - finish the course and her nqt year - as a maths teacher she should be in great demand after that.
Her course mentor should be of help in helping her over the hurdles along the way - they are well paid for this and no doubt have experienced all your wife is suffering either personally or in close proximity over the years.
There is a reason there is a teacher shortage at the moment and schools are recruiting overseas - but if your wife can stick with it I do believe it is a fantastic job that fits brilliantly around family life.
Please make sure she is a member of a union while she is a student - I don't think you have to pay as student members - for an extra level of protection.

The idea of teaching being family friendly is a complete myth. You're in a good hour before the children and lesson planning and marking long into the evening. Yes, much of this can be done at home but that's at the expense of your own children, unless you want to start it after they've gone to bed and still be working at 11pm.

I have a loved one that has taught for many years and is now desperate to get out. He's on a good salary and now has the difficulty of finding something that will match or come close, and with a relatively narrow expertise that's tough.

If your partner wants to walk away, now or after her PGCE, there's no shame in doing so. Her health (and yours) are far more important.

marliepanda

silvercar wrote: »

Look at smaller schools and faith schools, they will be more nurturing and more positive. She really is at the low point now, with course work, placements and finding work all at the same time.

I worked in a small school (4 teachers, one of which was then head who worked teaching y3/4 in the mornings, 5 children in y5, two in y6.) maybe far smaller than you mean but that school was horrendous. By far the !!!!!iest and worst place to work. At least if there's more staff there's more options if your having trouble.

Faith schools, well personally I couldn't work in one.

All schools are different. No 'type' of school is more nurturing than others. It depends on management and the pressures the government are putting on.

Don't get me wrong, I'm coming from a very jaded and biased place. However it's not one based on just my own experience.

Voyager2002

Yes, teacher training is incredibly demanding. I must say, I wondered why she is doing unnecessary work (clubs and things) rather than focusing solely on what she needs to do in order to pass the course.

Once she has the PGCE she should easily be able to pick up work as a private tutor and manage her own time. If she wants to complete the probationary year than that would be a better time to apply for jobs rather than spending time that she simply cannot spare to go to interviews now.

And there is no shame in getting "burnt out" by the PGCE course and having to interrupt it -- one of my friends, someone who has always wanted to be a teacher, had to do just that and in fact has just returned to her PGCE after an extended break.

Catapillerry

Voyager2002 wrote: »

Yes, teacher training is incredibly demanding. I must say, I wondered why she is doing unnecessary work (clubs and things) rather than focusing solely on what she needs to do in order to pass the course.

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Agreed, it seems odd to me.
Put it this way, she's in a SCITT, which means it's led by a teaching college, and only 1 day a month at university.
As they immerse you into school life, they pretty much expect them to be involved in a couple of clubs. Trainees have been pulled up by senior teachers about it (another example of the expectation and treatment by others!)
They also expected them to go to the city university one day (a 10 hour day with travel) then straight to their parents evening, then lesson plan later. She did 15 hours that day, and the next day was an open day so a similar day.

pmlindyloo

As a retired teacher I would never, ever recommend teaching as a career. it seems such a good choice for those with families but the reality is just as you have found it.

Life is far too short to try and make a go of it. Your wife has done tremendously well to get her degree. To be unable to go to work and 'hide under the covers' suggests a high level of anxiety and stress.

Look at the terms and conditions of her placement to find out what notice she has to give and then, give it.

She will find an immediate sense of relief. I have seen the strongest of people reduced to tears and leave teaching, not because of the children but because of the ridiculous amount of work put upon them.

Make a decision together, tell her how proud you are of her to have got that far and then just get out. Trust me, it won't get any better.

tyler2027

My daughter did a PGCE.


I'm not one of those "precious" mothers who hoover over their adult offspring and fight on their behalf.


But it was much as I could do not to confront the "mentor" who placed beyond unreasonable demands on my daughter. A good first placement in a state school, good support, but mostly encouragement got her through the academic and practical side of things.


The second placement was horrendous. A private school, a clique of teachers and trainee teachers who were "in", that being the die hard never worked at any other school brainwashed/succumbed teachers.........and the pgce students who had come from a private school education.


My daughter wasn't welcome from day one. Her and the other two pgce students were treated equally for the first 20 minutes of the first day. After being asked about their own education, the other two from a private background were treated vastly different to my state school educated daughter.


I could bore you with the finer details of the bullying, undermining and unfair treatment she experienced. Suffice it to say they criticised everything she did, yet when uni were alerted to the problem external assessors graded her as satisfactory or excellent.


They failed her in the end. With a week and a half of the placement left. She turned up the day after. The mentor said to her in front of witnesses "I didn't think you would be showing up today!" My daughter didn't want to be there - but she didn't want to give them the satisfaction. She worked and worked hard up until the last day. Strangely - left to teach kids by herself.


The end result was that the other two pgce students stood up for my daughter and complained to uni. Uni didn't really want to know, turns out they know the school well. My daughter was given the opportunity to re-do a second placement (a rare opportunity).


She never went back to uni. She came home. I sent my daughter off less than a year earlier a bubbly confident engaging young lady. I got back a broken, depressed, chain smoking reclusive skeleton who had lost 2 stone, from a slim 8 stone frame. Her self esteem and confidence was non existant.


It took a year to get her "back" but scars remain.


Having said that, she does a non graduate type job on minimum wage. She works in a supportive team and she is happy doing the job. She socialises with colleagues, and is appreciated by management. She doesn't earn the salary she could have earnt - nor the career and progression opportunities.


As she says, she would rather have less money and be happy than sell her soul and be in torment.


edited to add. my daughter wasn't a fresh newly qualified undergrad (graduated 2013).....she was 26 at the time of the PGCE and had a work history behind her....including dealing with pressure and stressful situations (hospitality, corporate hospitality, care work)

Blackbeard_of_Perranporth

Thanks, another reason I gave teaching a miss.

zippygeorgeandben

This is such a demoralising thread to read

tensandunits_2

marliepanda wrote: »

Sorry but that's just the tip of the iceberg. I recently left (primary) teaching after five years and wouldn't recommend it to my worst enemy.

The teaching is fine. Wonderful in fact. It's also about 10%of your actual job.

I know two teachers in primary schools who gave up their teaching posts and one of them instead became a teaching assistant. Lower status job but none of the ridiculous red tape, bureaucracy and pressure.

OP I think you and your wife need to prioritise quality of life and family time together first. No job is worth having a breakdown over.

Catapillerry

zippygeorgeandben wrote: »

This is such a demoralising thread to read

Yep - I'm in the middle of the storm and can't believe how terrible it is for others too.