Debt Demolisher

motivated

Skulking back in

Morning all. I've finally plucked up the courage to post again. It's been a horrendous few months here Financially, marriage, family, house, work. I could go on but I won't. I've been in hiding with my head firmly in the sand I can tell you. To the point of me nearly closing my account here down and running for the hills. DH and I have been arguing about anything and everything like playing the blame game again. He's been drinking a lot and even took out a couple of short term loans :mad: I know it sounds like I'm putting all the blame on him but I've been miserable and think I have added to the miserableness ( is that even a word) in the house

To say I'm deflated is an understatement and no I'm not looking for pity I'm just sick of going round in circles and constantly running on a treadmill. As another year comes to a close I'm here yet again thinking :(:(

Where were at:

• Bills are paid
• Christmas is over
• Debt is still mahoosive :mad:
• Still on token payments
• Emergency fund used
• Savings pots more or less empty
• Back at the starting line

Also plucked up the courage to check credit scores/accounts :eek:
According to these we actually seem back at the starting post. OH GOD!!!

Please no judgments as I don't think I could take it mentally
X

ChasingSunshine

Sorry you have been having such a hard time lately. I know it’s hard but just think if you hadn’t already done some of the work building savings pots, emergency fund etc you would be much worse off than being back at the start. Not to say that’s not really hard and so difficult when you have already made so many sacrifices but bills are paid, Christmas is over and you now know where you stand rather than just imagining figures.
You will get there. This is another obstacle in the road and hopefully things will begin to improve for both you and DH now.

motivated

Chasingsunshine. Thank you for you words of encouragement

I know we can get things back on track as long as we pull together. We've done it before and CAN do it again I'm sure. It's just such a kick in the teeth to find ourselves around another circle :mad:

I plan today to sit away from any distractions and get my old faithful pen and paper out and scrub out the past year and start again. It's going to be the only way. Wallowing in self pity is not going to clear this mess up I know.

I'm thinking that maybe I've been a bit unrealistic with budgets etc and need to rethink. We still need to live a semi normal life.

I've even put the tree away as I cant stand the thought of Christmas at the moment

All petty excuses aside it's time to go forward TOGETHER and get out my massive broom ready to start sweeping the bloody mess up
X

Dorastar

Been there, got the t-shirt in the past, you will get there. Cheering you on from the sidelines.

motivated

Dorastar wrote: »

Been there, got the t-shirt in the past, you will get there. Cheering you on from the sidelines.

Thank you

No time like the present to get started I suppose.

Thankfully DH didn't get paid early this year. He gets paid tomorrow so we will be able to budget and plan from there
M

thecompetitionaddict

Good Luck and here's hoping that 2020 will be kind to busting your debt!

motivated

thecompetitionaddict wrote: »

Good Luck and here's hoping that 2020 will be kind to busting your debt!

Thank you all so much. I'm tearing up just to think people (so far) have not judged or reminded me what absolute ar$oles we've been :mad: Definitely a joint effort.

Lazy day ahead with no more looking back and lots of planning to do

Thank you all again
M

Willing2Learn

motivated wrote: »

I've even put the tree away as I cant stand the thought of Christmas at the moment

Oh...that is really sad. I hope that your 2020 debt-busting journey gets back on track soon.

What makes you think that your budget has not been realistic? Maybe if you posted up your current SOA on the main DFW board, members may be able to help you with that...

motivated

Willing to learn. Thankyou and I should take note of your username

I know the budgets have gone t|ts up because food shopping has gone haywire, took my eye off the ball. Having takeaways willy nilly. Stressed and not being bothered to cook. Been paying back little loans spending money on the car and just not sticking to budgets properly really


Won't need to food shop for a while at least.
M

Cherryfudge

Sending hugs, Motivated. You'll get there, you've turned the corner with the season, evidently. As the days get longer and you no longer have Christmas hanging over you, you can get things back on track. We'll be cheering you on! x