Can I buy my mums house

teddysmum

AnotherJoe wrote: »

Seems unlikely. Once you change these devices, mother will most likely not be able to use it at all, as its different. Only needs one knob in a different place, one new switch, one extra thing to do or even one less thing to do, to totally discombobulate those with dementia, at a level of minute change that is incomprehensible to those who haven't experienced it in practice.

Central heating would involve no intervention from the lady so would be much safer than an open fire.


Making the house safer would come under the remit of POA transactions having to be in the lady's interests.

AnotherJoe

teddysmum wrote: »

Central heating would involve no intervention from the lady so would be much safer than an open fire.

Maybe. Maybe not. She might for example conclude that since is there is no coal fire she must be in the wrong house and go outside looking for it. Its hard to get your head around until you've experienced it and seen it.

And gas hob would require mother to do something new and thats just a no-no. Gas seems to be a common danger, a friend of mine (who has just put his mother into a care home and is currently selling her bungalow to fund it) found pans boiled dry a couple of times.

Although she was reluctant to move he did it on the basis that it was no longer safe for her to be alone (despite the numerous carers going in every day). She went for a couple of weeks over xmas to be near son, now whilst she still wants to go home is now content that will be "next week" and is happy where she is. Very sad. Very common.

"luckily" with my parents it was the one that would hardly know what a gas stove was who got dementia but they had numerous issues with any change however minute it was and I know from talking to others in a similar position this just goes with the territory.

lincroft1710

teddysmum wrote: »

Central heating would involve no intervention from the lady so would be much safer than an open fire.

Room thermostats need batteries changing and may need adjusting. TRVs may need adjusting. Boiler may need re-pressurising. Obviously something a relative could do when visiting, but would the dementia sufferer remember to tell her visitor.

cte1111

If and when your Mum needs residential care, then you can choose to fund it however you are able. I paid for some of my Gran's care from another inheritance, whilst we were waiting for the sale of her flat to go through (these things always take longer than you expect).

However I can't see that buying your Mum's house at this point makes much sense currently. If your Mum has a large amount of capital, as she will if you buy her house, then it is likely that she will lose some of her current means tested benefits. She will then have to use up her capital to replace this income. It might be that you are happy for this to happen, but it is something to bear in mind.

I can see you've been through an awful lot recently and the thought of somehow 'losing' your parents' home must be pulling at your heart strings. However I would advise trying to take a step back and think about what you are trying to achieve.

For now, your Mum is being looked after at home and is able to fund this care with the help of pension credit etc. If she become less able to cope at home, then she might need residential care, in which case at some point the house may need to be sold. However it might never come to that, in which case you would inherit the house eventually and can decide what to do with it then.

If she does need residential care, then you could consider buying it yourself then or letting it out to help pay for your Mum's care. It seems like you would need to spend quite a bit to make it lettable though, which is something to think about too.