Sashybo - Back Again

sashybo

Thanks Hidden, any tips are always welcome. I was thinking about a sling as it sounds ideal but my back is still really sore and I'm worried that it might make it worse. I'm back at the chiropractor next week so may ask her about it.

The homegrown veg is lovely, we've got radish, runner beans, lettuce, spring onions & tomatoes growing as well so fingers crossed they do well. My in-laws are big gardeners so DH has their experience to fall back on as well.

Speaking of the PIL, they're arriving tomorrow for a few days visit (NOT staying with us) to see the baby. I fully expect not to get a hold of the child all weekend. :rotfl: Fingers crossed I can sneak away for naps so that I a) don't lose my temper when the PIL say something stupid/tactless (fully expecting to be accused of "spoiling" the baby by picking him up when he cries) & b) can catch up on my sleep.

Hiddenidenity

Take full advantage of the extra hands to do the holding catch up on sleep where you can

I'd def try a sling meet if there's one local rather than buying one then, that way they can give their advice on whats best for your back too and check its at the correct height/position etc for both of you x

swimminginaseaofdebt

Hi Sashybo,

Just popping in to say a belated congratulations! Hope you manage to catch up on some sleep and pick the little one up as much as you feel he needs it They grow so fast he'll soon be on the move and the cuddles will be missed (mines is nearly one and got held a lot when he was younger - to much criticism - but he's now a wriggly worm and I can't get him to sit still unless he's eating lol). Also I've heard baby massage can be helpful for colic, not sure how true this is but might be worth investigating x

Treadingonplaymobil

Slings were a life saver for us too. I tried a few but DH and I both found a wrap sling the solution, as you can support the weight on your hips as they get heavier, and tie it according to their size when they are teeny. Baby Bjorns and similar were dire for my back and are thought by many not to be great for baby's hips/pelvis. Also had varying degrees of success with a ring sling (too crooked for me, could never get used to the one-sidedness), and a Manduka carrier (backpack type thing with a hip belt, was really useful when they were older and could go on the back).

Eager_Elephant

Have a read about cranial osteopathy for babies - it is recommended for babies who have had a traumatic or fast birth.

It's basically all linked to the skull and how in a traumatic or fast birth the skull doesn't prepare itself properly and so the head ends up squished and out of shape and so that presses on nerves etc and causes issues like no sleeping and crying when not being held.

I took my daughter when she was 18mths old as that was when I first heard about it but wish someone had mentioned it when she was a newborn. My labour with my daughter was 3.5 hours so really fast - she never slept through the night and would wake up to 10 times a night. It was exhausting but you just cope.
Then when she was 18mths someone suggested cranial osteopathy and I took her and it was fab. The only downside was that by then she moved a lot so wouldn't lay nicely for them to massage her head and do whatever they did but they did there best. When we left she slept for 10hrs straight (a miracle) and from then on she only woke 4 -5 times a night which I was more than happy with.
I assume if I had gone back for more sessions it may have got even better but she just wouldn't sit still enough for them to do anything after the first session.

I just googled cranial osteopathy and my nearest town and found a really lovely practice.

sashybo

Hidden I'm taking advantage of the PIL being here to hold the baby so I can get things done around the house - the problem is getting him back again!

I seriously think I would have to wrestle him off my MIL. I know they live far away & won't see him as much as they'd like but I feel like I'm not allowed to hold my own baby when they're here.:( As soon as MIL walks in the door it's "Oh will I take the baby for you?" I feel like saying no because I won't get him back again until they leave! They were at our house from 7pm until half past midnight last night! To be fair that was more FIL drinking whiskey & watching the rugby on catch up, I could tell that MIL felt awkward about it but she still hogged the baby anyway.

Today baby was whisked off me within 2 seconds (over 3 hours ago now) & I haven't had a look in since. Went off in a huff to clean my bathrooms so at least got something useful done but DH didn't even notice I was gone! They were all sitting outside in the garden with my baby but without me!

DH then let MIL take the baby for a walk in the pram without asking or even telling me!:mad: I was raging as we've not even taken him a walk yet (rubbish weather, then lack of a sunshade for the pram yesterday). He doesn't think he's done anything wrong & obviously didn't even occur to MIL to ask me if I 'd mind her taking my baby out.:mad: So went to lie down for a nap & had a cry, still hiding in my room. DH did come up and talk to me and said just to take the baby off her but it's not really that easy is it? They already think I'm moody & hysterical because I don't always do what they want.:(

That turned into a bit of a rant there.:o

sashybo

Hi swimming thanks. Will definitely be picking the baby up when he cries as he works himself into a right state otherwise. To be honest I'm not getting the chance at the moment due to overbearing in-laws anyway - see ranty post above.:o

I've also heard that about baby massage- the health visitor gave me a booklet which has some of the basics so may try it out.

TOPM thanks for the sling info, will definitely look into it.

EE thanks for the suggestion - my chiropractor has said she wants to check the baby in a few weeks to make sure that his neck is properly aligned after his forceps birth. Will see how he's doing at that point but would definitely consider the cranial osteopathy as well.

sashybo

PIL went home yesterday afternoon thankfully. I'm SO glad I put my foot down about them not staying with us. I really wouldn't have been able to cope with that. MIL was making me feel so anxious & down with her behaviour and didn't seem to notice or care.

I'm really dreading their next visit now, which I don't want to do as obviously it's good for the baby to have lots of people that love him. MIL just wants to take over though - I just wanted to tell her "He's not your baby, he's mine. Back off & stop hovering over him all the time!"

I've never felt included when we spend time with the PIL - they're only interested in their son. Now it's worse because their laser focus is on my poor baby & I was feeling even more pushed out in my own house.

My poor DH tries to include me but as I've mentioned before they emotionally manipulate & bully him a lot. They don't listen to what he says or don't believe him when he tells them things he knows more about than them. MIL kept hovering over him & trying to take the baby off him as though he couldn't be trusted with him.:mad:

I'm also still in a lot of pain with my back/pelvis and it makes getting up & sitting down very sore. Plus if I sit too long it makes the pain worse. MIL kept making comments/digs about how FIL didn't have any time off work when DH was born & she was in lots of pain for months with her stitches but just had to get on with it. :mad:

All that stress on top of the lack of sleep with the baby's colic was not helpful. I'm just glad they don't live too close if that's the way MIL is going to carry on. Maybe she'll calm down as times goes on but I wouldn't bet on it.

kirtsypoos

They sound difficult to cope with at the best of times Sashy, I don't envy you there.

At least you, DH and little'un can get back to your routine again now

sashybo

Hi Kirsty, yes PIL are hard work even without a grandchild being involved. They also basically told me I've not to have any more children because they're too expensive! :eek::rotfl: Aye right cos it's their decision if DH & I have another child in the future. :rotfl:

Went to chiropractor the other day & need to go back again next week, still very sore.:( She checked the baby as well & did a bit of work on his hips & neck and will check him again at my next appointment. She said it might help his colic as well.

Colic is still hurting poor DS but we are trying a few different things like baby massage & tilting his moses basket at a slight angle and he has been a bit better the last few nights. Hopefully his chiropractor appointment helped a bit as well.

Heard from my workmates that big changes are being implemented in our department & that my job is being moved to another office (which is a lot further away) & away from everyone I've worked with for nearly 7 years.

I'm looking to go job share as can't work the shifts I used to with a small baby & don't want to move office so will probably have to apply for another job. Have yet to hear any of this officially though so will speak to my manager about it once he informs me.