Help on selling joint property

Marcie_m82

My ex and I split in October, I tried to stay in the house with the idea that I would get it on the market sell and then move back to Wales with my family. He kept harassing me about contact with his son which I had said he could have every Sunday as I felt our son needed a routine but that wasn't good enough for him. So I moved out as my mental health wasn't able to cope with it. (I am medicated for depression and anxiety and speak with my doctor regularly). He has now moved the women he was having an affair into the house with her child. I am unable to continue paying the mortgage so have spoken to them and given them full details of what has happened. The we're going to look at a mortgage break to help while we tried to sort out what was going to happen but since my ex has phoned them and paid the mortgage and says he is going to continue to pay. However it is not him paying it it's his new women. He seems to think after 6 months that his new women and her child will have some type claim on the house. Is this true?
The other thing is when we met he was bankrupted, so he couldn't have credit so I had most in my name. In total we have a debt of £52k of which £32k is in my name. The house we own is joint tennat and last time it was valued 1 year ago was worth £270k and the mortgage left on it is £187k. I want to sell and I know his credit rating is bad so he is unable to buy me out but he is refusing to sell, a friend said I am unlikely to get a court order to sell what can I do?

So worried. X

Pixie5740

Is your friend qualified to give legal advice? I'm going to take a punt and say, "no." It is possible to force the sale of a jointly owned property through the courts. It can be a lengthy process but the sooner you get the ball rolling the sooner it will be over. Get proper legal advice.

I'm not sure what your situation is regarding access to your son so it might also be worth getting legal advice from a solicitor specialising in family law.

As for the debt I'm guessing that you aren't/weren't married so that can't be wrapped up as part of the divorce meaning if it's in your name you're responsible for it. If you're struggling with the debt then contact one of the debt charities CAP UK, National Debtline or Step Change.

da_rule

Yes you can apply to the court to get an order to sell, you are best getting proper legal advice for this and the costs probably won't be recoverable. Your ex would then have to either move out or him and his new partner could offer to buy you out (this doesn't sound likely).

Other option, can he afford to cover the entire mortgage payment? If not, and this is a bit of a nuclear option, stop paying the mortgage and let them repossess the property. They'd kick him out with no issues. They would then sell the property and any money that was left after the mortgage has been paid and they've recovered their costs would be split between you. This is, in reality, a really bad option as it would do a lot of damage to your credit rating.

millie84

I was/am in a similar situation to you. Bought a house with my ex, split up in July 2011.
I moved out, he stayed in the property. I've been trying to get my name off the mortgage ever since. I have had progress recently, the house went on the market in August, finally! But it took me two years of writing letters, sending emails and getting a solicitor involved, and I was getting nowhere.
I would advise sending a letter to your ex, outlining your intentions and what you expect from him, and within what timescale. Send it recorded delivery, so he can't deny receiving it. Keep records of all messages and letters sent and received. If he is being obstructive, you can then use these records to show this, and it will help your case if it does go to court.
If this doesn't work, Find a good local family solicitor, and get a free consultation with them.
My solicitor sent my ex an official letter with an offer. Several letters later there was still no progress. In order to go to court to force the sale, you must attend a mediation session (on your own). My next step was court, but I was delaying this due to the money involved. I am considering bankruptcy due to debts, so could not afford the fees. Then, out of the blue, my ex agreed to a sale. He is still paying the mortgage, but made the decision to vacate the house, which I told him was entirely his choice.
So now we are waiting for a sale, hopefully it will happen soon.

With regards to the new partner, she can have a financial interest in the property if she is seen as paying towards the mortgage, but this does not affect your share, as far as I understand it, it comes out of his share.

Marcie_m82

Thanks for your responses. My friend has a legal background and seems to think that the courts would not really consider the debt and as long as he is paying the mortgage would not give an order of sale.

We have been to mediation where he said he did not think it was appropriate to talk about finances and he was only there to talk about access to our son (Which i offered in certain conditions and he refused). So we have been signed off from mediation.
I now believe that he has not paid this months mortgage which is worrying about. I have been to CAB and they have said I have the option of going bankrupt which will mean the house is taken in that but I am trying to avoid this as even though my credit rating is shocking at the moment I know I can build it back up.

I don't know what to do for the best.

Millie84 - How comes it took so long?

Thanks Nat

Mojisola

Marcie_m82 wrote: »

I have been to CAB and they have said I have the option of going bankrupt which will mean the house is taken in that but I am trying to avoid this as even though my credit rating is shocking at the moment I know I can build it back up.

I don't know what to do for the best.

Don't dismiss this without a lot of thought. It may be the best option as your ex is so unco-operative regarding money.

steampowered

A key question is are you married to this person? If so, matters relating to the house could be resolved as part of the divorce process.

If you are not married, then as you say you are joint owners of the property, and you will need his consent to sell.

If you want to release your equity, you could obtain a court order to force a sale. If he is no longer living in the house, surely the court would grant it?

I don't understand why your friend thinks a court would not grant an order for sale simply because the mortgage is being paid. Your friend might be thinking about things from the mortgage company's perspective, i.e. a lender would only get an order for sale if there were arrears on the mortgage. A co-owner order for sale is a bit different and for that I don't think it really matters whether there are arrears on the mortgage.

Going bankrupt doesn't automatically mean the house would be taken. The bankruptcy trustee would still need to apply for a court order if it wants to force him to consent to the sale. Furthermore, if he can pay the mortgage, the bankruptcy trustee could agree to be bought-out by your ex for less equity than you have at the moment. Bankruptcy isn't a straightforward solution.

You also have to think about the child. It sounds like he wants to stop you selling to stop you moving back to Wales. He is legally entitled to play a part in the child's upbringing and that is also in the child's best interest, so it may be best to have that discussion with him, even though it is a difficult discussion? For example perhaps he could look after the child during school holidays?

It could be worth going to see a specialist family solicitor about this, given we are talking about your child and also about your house?

Guest101

Marcie_m82 wrote: »

My ex and I split in October, I tried to stay in the house with the idea that I would get it on the market sell and then move back to Wales with my family. - which is how far considering you share a child? He kept harassing me about contact with his son - that's not harassment, that's a father trying to see their child which I had said he could have every Sunday - why only every sunday, a 'routine could be 1 week with you 1 with him, that's still a routine. as I felt our son needed a routine but that wasn't good enough for him. So I moved out as my mental health wasn't able to cope with it. (I am medicated for depression and anxiety and speak with my doctor regularly) - are you the best care giver for your child? . He has now moved the women he was having an affair into the house with her child - so? . I am unable to continue paying the mortgage so have spoken to them and given them full details of what has happened - irrelevant. The we're going to look at a mortgage break to help while we tried to sort out what was going to happen but since my ex has phoned them and paid the mortgage and says he is going to continue to pay. - and not charging you anything? However it is not him paying it it's his new women. - irrelevant for you. He seems to think after 6 months that his new women and her child will have some type claim on the house. Is this true? - yes and no, she already has a claim to the house, but only in the sense of a beneficial interest. IE she is owed some money back. That said that would come from his half of the equity.
The other thing is when we met he was bankrupted, so he couldn't have credit so I had most in my name. - who's named on the mortgage? In total we have a debt of £52k of which £32k is in my name. - irrelevant, but unfortunate, you could try sue him for £6k, but it seems unlikely. The house we own is joint tennat and last time it was valued 1 year ago was worth £270k and the mortgage left on it is £187k. so approx. £70k after fees etc? I want to sell and I know his credit rating is bad so he is unable to buy me out but he is refusing to sell, a friend said I am unlikely to get a court order to sell what can I do?

So worried. X

Why would you not get a court ordered sale?


That is literally your only option, but the cost is several thousand pounds (probably in excess of £10k)

Guest101

Marcie_m82 wrote: »

Thanks for your responses. My friend has a legal background and seems to think that the courts would not really consider the debt and as long as he is paying the mortgage would not give an order of sale. - Can you name the firm so I can avoid like the plague?

We have been to mediation where he said he did not think it was appropriate to talk about finances and he was only there to talk about access to our son (Which i offered in certain conditions and he refused). So we have been signed off from mediation. - That was for access not for house. Also I'm not surprised he refused it, he can get more via the courts and you couldn't then change your mind.
I now believe that he has not paid this months mortgage which is worrying about. I have been to CAB and they have said I have the option of going bankrupt which will mean the house is taken in that but I am trying to avoid this as even though my credit rating is shocking at the moment I know I can build it back up.

I don't know what to do for the best.

Millie84 - How comes it took so long?

Thanks Nat

You need to sort out a number of issues, but keep them seperate

Marcie_m82

Hi Guest101

You may not see the constant demanding and using manipulation as harassment but I can assure you it was. Only once a week was reasonable as a the starting point. There are reasons for this which I have spoken to a solicitor about.

I have now moved and we are 1 hour away so the contact is an issue but I have offered a fair solution that I have been advised to offer from the solicitors and he point blank refused as it wasn't what he wanted. This is a whole different part of the situation.

I need to go back and speak to my solicitor from the responses on here as I have not really spoke about it in depth as my sons well-being was the most important to sort out.

Thanks for questioning if I am the best carer for our son the answer to that is yes. I put my son's need the priority and ensure he is well cared.

We are both named on the mortgage but we are not married. The debt has accumulated over the 7 years that we were together. My ex had to have the best of everything and pushed and pushed until i would give in and buy what he wanted IE furniture, sofas etc usually on pay monthly which has lead to us being in debt. I am fully aware its in my name and therefore I am responsibly even though all furniture that i'm in debt for is still in the house. What I need is the house to be sold and then I will be able to clear the debt. The purpose of mediation for me was access and financial issues. He refused to talk about finances which was his choice I asked if both could be talked about. As i said before I offered contact that was advised by the solicitor.

Thanks

Nat

Marcie_m82

Dear Steampower

No we were not married.

The CAB said that as the equity in the house is enough to cover the debt they would take it he could appose but it would just prolong the bankrupts instead of it actually stopping it. It is not what I want to do as obviously this isn't a situation that I wanted to be in.

He is still living in the house and has paid 1 mortgage payment since I have left and has defaulted on the second one.

I have left as his behaviour towards me was unacceptable and it was not good for me to stay. I needed support from my family so I have moved back. I was the one that arranged mediation to deal with the situation as this is what I was told is the best solution but he was uncooperative and didn't like that things did not going his way. I understand that he is his father and the best for our son is if we can come to a way that he is involved in his life but it has to be reasonable. Not just his way.

Thanks

Nat