From debt to freedom...

Drawingaline

Oh no on tyre costs!

My daughter is 14 and going into Yr 10.we spent last night looking at college courses and what A level results she might need for uni (she is pretty determined in her career path already!) it's pretty scary and I have been upfront with how much financial support she can expect from us. She has her own budget in our ynab and has to save a % of all income in a long term savings category.

crazy_cat_lady

You can't be too careful with the car and tyres when you use it so much. It's a pain getting so many tyres replaced (I had to do all four over a period of 2 months last year), but when you think that they are the only thing holding you and the children on the road then it's worth making sure that they are done.

Honeysucklelou2

You're right CCL, safety is worth paying for.

Drawing a line- what a good idea to plan ahead and for your DD to save now. I am very thankful that my oldest DD was awarded a bursary from her university. It's meant that she has been able to cover her housing costs over the summer which has been a great blessing ( landlord charges for August and September).

DS1 wanted to go to the barbers today, so I went with him and took the toddler for his first haircut. He looked so small sat up on the special child sized seat! He looks so different with his hair cut, gone is my baby with soft locks and now I have a little boy with short hair. Total spent was £19. I was impressed with both the barber and the toddler, who didn't make a sound as his hair was cut.

I popped into work for a couple of hours and got some things ready for next term. On the way back I spent £20 on a diesel top up, £16 on a new top ( I 've ended up recycling lots that were just too tatty or torn and now have much fewer clothes!), £10 on poultry corn and £4 on some aloe vera type spray for dogs, which I hope will help my elderly lurcher and £20 on a food top up. I've just got to pay the phone bill in a minute to finish off my spendy day.

The ex came round again today. Another stressful conversation followed in which we went round in circles. The same issues remain, nothing has been addressed :(:(:(. In the last few years of married life, when I got stressed from the various issues, my stomach used to feel like a washing machine spinning round...unfortunately it's starting again. As soon as he goes again, it starts to subside.

Spent some of this evening cutting the grass and pulling out nettles in the garden. I tried out the hedgecutter which, thankfully, wasn't too heavy to handle and got started on the hedge. I was impressed by how much had been cut in the few minutes I tried it. Will try to crack on tomorrow.
I finished the day with a coffee at my friend's house.

Honeysucklelou2

One of those days where I seemed to be needing to pick someone up or take another child somewhere else type of day! Not quite sure I achieved as much in the inbetween times. I took DD1 to work, came back and then met two friends for a coffee with 5 of the children. I washed up and cleaned the kitchen on my return before nipping into the nearest town to attend an appointment. Got back in time to pick up DD1 from work, dropping 2 children back home so that the ex could see them, going out to Mr T's for a few bits, then back home again... I can see why I've spent over £300 in diesel in August so far:eek::eek::eek:.

Tomorrow, 4 children are going away for the weekend with the ex. He's taking them camping so those children have been packing up ready for their trip. On the one hand I'm glad that he is making the effort to do something nice with them, on the other hand I feel a little frustrated that he can afford to take them away on a camping trip and I can't. Guess who's got to deal with the puppies this weekend? :think::think:On a positive note, I'm hoping to make the weekend as great as possible for the children that I've got. DD1 will be working for some of the time but am hoping that we can have fun at home.

DS1's results day is tomorrow. He has heard back from the college but I guess will know which level of diploma he needs to study, after results are known.

Cherryfudge

Sorry August is turning out to be expensive for you. I agree it's important to have good tyres though, and children are expensive to run, too. You sound as though you have a really positive relationship with yours and it's so worth that investment of time and attention.

I hope you don't have to go for the injunction. You could do without the extra cost and stress. Perhaps just the threat of it would reduce his visits?

And IMO the hedge trimmers are a good investment Things like basic rakes and trowels can often be had cheaply from car boot sales or auctions, but I'm guessing you have those and neat hedges (and lawns) are the garden equivalent of making the bed - the rest looks better the minute they're done!

XSpender

I have spent the last couple of days reading your diary and am amazed by how much you get done with a house full of children, dogs and a full time job.

All your lovely baking has been making my mouth water.

I hope DS got the results he wanted today.

Honeysucklelou2

:hello:Hi XSpender, thanks for dropping by.

The day began driving DS1 into school to collect his results. I think he has enough to do a level 2 diploma in his chosen subject, but sadly he's learnt the hard way that if you don't put the work in, you don't get the results.

The ex left with 4 of the children for a camping trip. I got to work and cleaned the external windows of the lounge, dining room, bedroom, utility room and the back door. I got some hot water and a scrubbing brush and set to work on the garden gate. It's a 5 bar gate designed to keep dogs and toddlers in, but I thought it would be a good precaution to Cuprinol it, to prevent any rot or weather damage. The actual painting part will have to be done another day. I'm hoping there will be a dry day at some point soon! I had previously taken the curtains down in the dining room and given them a wash so was able to rehang them tonight. I've got started on painting the hallway ceiling, which I have to say I'm quite pleased by!:) In between the cleaning and decorating, I've been folding and sorting washing, DD1 kindly sorted out the evening meal so that I could keep going on the housework.

Honeysucklelou2

Off to spend the day with my mum and grandmother. I promised my mum that I would help her in the garden for a day in the holidays. With the holidays rapidly coming to an end, I thought I'd better get that done today. Hopefully a day in her garden will give me a break from sorting out my house and give me motivation to get the next bit of painting done tonight.

Honeysucklelou2

I had a busy day yesterday in my mum's garden. She can do the grass cutting and hedge trimming but finds it difficult to do any cutting back of the trees, that requires loppers. We managed to fill 2 bulk bags full of branches, so my poor Dad will get the job of trying to manhandle to the tip. Unfortunately I ran out of time yesterday to get that bit done.

DD1 kindly cooked tea again last night. I think the realisation of having to cook for herself again soon is hitting her and she wants to get some practice in. Very beneficial for me as it gave me extra time to get laundry sorted and make a start on painting the hall walls.

My new solicitor has suggested that I try mediation. Apparently it is a pre-requisite to applying for a financial order, so she sent me the details of 2 local mediator services. The cost surprised me although I know that the cost of mediation is better than the cost of court time. £2,000 has already been spent on getting this separation, I'm worried about how much more it's going to cost.:(

DD2 is going to a wedding with the ex next week and ordered 3 dresses from Next. Unfortunately she can't make up her mind which one she prefers, although one has been decided against, so I'm gong to drive to the nearest shop to return that one. She hasn't mentioned who is paying for this dress yet...:o

Today looks to be a brighter day , so hoping to get the gate painted later. I promised the younger DDs that we would go swimming today. I'm trying to make sure that the weekend is fun for them between the washing and decorating. The allotment has a huge number of blackberries so I really need to make time to go and pick them!

Spendless

Hope you have something of a relaxing weekend since you've got less kids about - even if you have puppies instead.

Honeysucklelou2 wrote: »

The day began driving DS1 into school to collect his results. I think he has enough to do a level 2 diploma in his chosen subject, but sadly he's learnt the hard way that if you don't put the work in, you don't get the results.

So difficult isn't it, the way things are structured now. Back in the 80s I didn't get the required 5 O levels to get onto A levels, but the sixth form school I was going to offered another range of O levels and I sat and passed 3 more (still didn't get a good enough grade in the re-taken maths -lol) but that choice doesn't seem to be there anymore other than the English Lang and Maths re-sits.

What I will say is choose wisely where he goes next (if you can). I was against my DS going to the FE college for his BTec level 3, because of the things I'd heard about it, my thoughts were ignored and he has done so poorly there he's been offered foundation at Uni instead of being able to go onto yr1. How poorly he's done, we have no idea, because he hasn't got his results and seems oblivious to how he finds the info out - which says it all to me about the place. I'm determined my DD going into yr11 won't go there next year. Meanwhile a new sixth form college that only opened last year, so a year too late for my DS has been posting their results for the pupils who did have to re-sit English Lang and Maths, many have gone up 4 grades, 1 has gone up a whacking 6 grades from last year.