EH - Essex > Hebrides...the next step of the adventure?

MrsPorridge

How are you doing EH?

EssexHebridean

Thanks for checking in everyone - much appreciated, always, but especially at the moment. 

I'm OK - with hindsight heading off to visit MrEH's folks for the weekend wasn't the right thing for me - I went along with the idea because it was what had been planned since we'd had to cancel the original trip at Easter due to the dreaded virus, and because everyone kept telling me I "should go, it would be good to have change of scene" - I'm usually pretty good these days at focusing on "should's" and deciding whether in fact they are things I want to do, or not - this time I just didn't have the mental energy to think clearly about it and the easiest approach was to go along with what everyone thought I "should" do... Ultimately it was incredibly tough mentally - MIL was fab - she always is mind you. FIL is a struggle - again, this is often the case. Seeing him squander the level of health and mobility that in real terms he would be able to have if he focused on the things he can do rather than the things he can't, was beyond tough, and thinking about how determined my Dad was to get on and live his life in spite of the challenges he faced in doing so - well, you can probably imagine. Add in just a lot of time with lots of people - good fun, much of it, but still not much "quiet time" - and I was very glad to escape to Torbay for the airshow on Saturday, where I spent the day mostly just wandering round the place with Claire, and got the surprise of my life when the Reds dedicated the Synchro "Heart" to the memory of my Dad. Incredibly emotional but just SUCH a lovely thing for them to do, I was completely blown away! 

We got home just before midnight on Saturday night (MrEH picked me up at Newton Abbot - we'd have been earlier if I'd not had a delay to my train as the traffic was pretty decent for a change!) and yesterday was a gentle day - a bit of harvesting of gooseberries and redcurrants, some garden pottering, a brief walk in the afternoon, and generally some recharging of batteries which was much needed.  Stopped off briefly to see Mum on the way back through from our wander, and she's doing OK too. 

The start of month money shuffle is now mostly done - just my personal bits to do. We had a veg box this weekend but aside from that I've currently resisted doing any more shopping - we both still had milk which was the main thing, I can make fruit stretch I think...and I'm raiding the freezer for meals - we had soup for lunch yesterday, and will have bolognese tonight, with couscous lined up for tomorrow I think, with a lamb and stir-fried veg accompaniment. Wednesday and Thursday still need some thought, although I'm thinking Sausage and mash will do one day...I'd be pleased if I could avoid a supermarket trip, and I think with a bit of inventive cooking this week I probably can. MrEH spent 30p in an A5da while he was waiting for me and my delayed train on yellow stickered bagels (2 packs) and crumpets (1 pack) all of which got stashed into the freezer and will be useful - the bagels will be used for lunches this week for a start to save us running the bread maker. It *might* be that we need MrEH to dive into Al's later in the week to get some odds and ends but we'll see. 

Spending generally over the weekend was lower than I might normally expect - I think MrEH treated his M&D to lunch on Saturday but he'll have paid for that from his own account as I wasn't there too. There were some beers - and some food bought as we were out and about most of the time - I probably owe MrEH for some bits and bobs so I'll need to check that with him. My spending at the airshow was limited to a Cornish pasty & a portion of cheesy chips (traditional airshow healthy diet there!) plus my bus there and train back. 

Other than that, I've been giving some thought to Cheery's recent internet reduction project - I'm conscious that I tend to spend a lot of time online with various things, and have long wondered where I might be able to make changes - or indeed even if I want to. I think the first and biggest thing for me is simply being more mindful about it. A lot of my friends are scattered far and wide rather than being people I see on a regular basis locally, and of course my workplace interaction is mostly limited to just Mr Boss plus random clients here and there, so if I tried to reduce the social media side to nothing I could rapidly end up feeling very isolated I think. I've really appreciated the sheer level of support I've had from people via various social media channels over the past few weeks as well - it's made a huge difference just folk checking in every now and again and saying "how're you doing" or "hope you're coping OK" as well. However, all that said, my screen time often does feel quite high, and I am definitely guilty of frittering more time than I'd sometimes like, so it is something I want to give consideration to I  think. Hearing someone talk so eloquently about the advantages they have found in cutting back so dramatically on "online time" was really thought provoking, and it's definitely something I want to continue exploring. Very possibly more to come on this one. 

milann

I know I spend too much time on line since I finished work, but it’s a way if keeping in touch with people…..both RL friends and virtual ones. I’ve just been away to dds and purposely didn’t take my iPad. I didn’t miss it when I was busy…..
It’s hard accepting negativity in people about their health when you’ve known others who give everything they can to keep positive and as active as they can. I can totally understand how frustrating it must have been for you.
Your trip to the air show sounds exactly what you needed…..take care and go with the flow of emotions that are probably still all over the show 👍

beanielou

What an awesome tribute to your dad 

EssexHebridean

Milann - that's exactly it with the online stuff, so much of what I do *is* keeping in contact with people. I have still be thinking about the whole thing though as I think re-evaluating the things we tend to do as standard is always a good idea - and one thing I realised is that I'm increasingly finding Tw1tter really difficult to cope with - the negativity and just downright unpleasantness on there these days is horrific. I'm putting in 5 minutes here and there now to tidy my feed up a bit - and I think some folk might get either unfollowed or muted to reduce the unpleasantness level even further. side from that, I can consciously be less drawn into scrolling on there and more focused on remaining within my own notifications which when I'm posting photos often works well. I have just had a satisfying unfollowing session anyway - mostly just accounts I had followed years back for whatever reason that either aren't still tweeting, or that I no longer have interest in their subject matter, but I did find several that I'm pretty certain I hadn't ever followed in the first place too! 

Beanie - it was indeed awesome, I still can't get over the sheer kindness of the chap who thought of it. 

Remaining money-shuffling was done this morning - it's interesting, since I've been splitting my personal money for my own spends out into the separate account I seem to be spending less. I'm sure some of that is that we're simply still not out and about quite so much as we were pre-pandemic - certainly the airshow side of things is a lot quieter at the moment than in would have been at this point in 2019 for example - but still, seeing "money left over" each month is a nice bonus. I'm currently opting to leave the balance remaining in my spends account but clearing my "budget" account where the DD's come from of any surplus at the end of the month, and that's working nicely. 

Not much to report at the moment to be honest - trying to get my head round being back - on the surface at least - to "normal life" when underneath everything feels currently as though it will never be "normal" again - and of course it won't, will it because "normal" is now a totally different shape for me and Mum, at least. It's taking a lot of headspace though - not least as it still feels entirely unreal. I'm not exactly surprised how hard the change is to comprehend, but I am slightly anxious about what happens at the point when it DOES start to feel real.

Going to decide when I get home this evening whether tea tonight will be couscous based, whether I'll use one of the sachets of mixed grains etc that we have, or whether I'll make the base something else entirely. On top will be chunks of lamb along with lightly stir fried veggies though. I should be home a little earlier this evening so might do the leg work to prep the dhal for later in the week this evening so it will just need reheating on whichever night I choose to cook it. 

Staffordia

I completely agree with you on  Tw1tter. I had a complete clear out of the accounts I was following and now stick to 3 topics. I also have a no politics of any kind rule, so will unfollow on those topics if that gets violated.

savingholmes

Glad the air show was lovely - especially with the tribute.

Glad you are listening to yourself - even if it's after the fact - it will help you know better how you might want to act next time.

foxgloves

Another one here who spends too much time online, @EH. Haven't come up with a plan to reduce it yet, but it's something I'm turning over in my mind as I go about my daily tasks. My big online rabbit hole is the news. I'm a real news junkie & follow UK politics/ economy closely, including party politics although I'm not currently as active locally in the latter as I used to be. All the time management training back when I was working recommended checking emails first thing in the morning & again after lunch to avoid breaking concentration to stop & deal with each email as they came in. I think I will try a similar approach with my online time generally. Still at the thinking stage but I would like to implement changes from next Monday.
F

EssexHebridean

That's a good way of dealing with it possibly Foxgloves - it's so easy just to decide to quickly check something and 15 minutes later you're still there, isn't it!  SH I did know from the start that going down to Devon wasn't really the right timing for me - but didn't particularly fancy being at home on my own either and I wouldn't have wanted to stop MrEH going. It was a tricky one to balance. Staffordia I've been amazed how fast my clear out on twitter has started taking effect! I've decided that from now each time I go on there I will act to mark subjects as things I no longer want to see immediately I see them. For my money it was a far nicer environment when you simply saw stuff from folk you followed! 

Well - exciting news in EH-Land is that I managed to get my hands on two tickets to see Queen+Adam Lambert at the O2 tomorrow! As tickets go they are certainly not cheap, but we're using the cash we had from my Great Aunt to "do something nice" to pay for the majority of them with just £20 to add on top. I'm ludicrously excited - and even more so having seen their opener for the jubilee concert at the weekend on TV. I nearly got tickets when they went on sale for this tour a few years ago - of course it's been postponed several times since then. I wouldn't usually dream of spending this sort of money on a gig ticket but right now it feels like the right thing to do to just say "s0d it!"  I've previously seen both Roger Taylor & Brian May live numerous times but I've never actually seen "Queen" as such - this will definitely be the next best thing! Most exciting! 

Banking all checked and OK (the credit card is quivering about the tickets, but apart from that...!) and everything else aside from the grocery spending is transferred across to the card to clear it so all good there - I'll hold off on the grocery spending just in case we do end up spending anything more between now and Friday - I'm hoping not though. MrEH has stopped talking about needing more milk, and as I had no plans to go for anything else...!

Tomorrow night's planned tea of sweet potato dhal will roll across to either Friday or a day next week I think as we'll need to eat out tomorrow evening now. Currently trying to decide where might work best for that too - possibly a pub or somewhere - I'm determined to avoid the expensive options at the venue itself! Tonight is going to be my planned salad I think - which I really fancy, MrEH will be less delighted I'm sure but there you go. If he'd eat more salady type things then he'd have a more interesting plateful though! Should harvest the first of our first sowing of landcress tonight hopefully too which is quite exciting! 

Sun_Addict

How fabulous. I would love to see Queen and Adam Lambert. Enjoy 🤩