How shall I tell SO he needs to bring in more...?

lika_86

Don't suggest going on holiday, just book it and pay for it. It sounds like a bit of male pride to me.

sulphate

I think this post is a bit harsh. If my husband told me that I needed to earn more I would be really upset.

I do however think your household expenses should be split more equally - one of you having £300 leftover and the other £1k is ridiculous. My husband and I earn differing amounts but we combine everything and have a similar amount of "luxury" money each month.

To be honest, £300 a month is still a good amount of "luxury" money.

onomatopoeia99

If he's already paying the correct CSA amount for maintenance, how will the ex partner's change in working hours and consequent change in childcare affect what he has to pay?

JP1978

onomatopoeia99 wrote: »

If he's already paying the correct CSA amount for maintenance, how will the ex partner's change in working hours and consequent change in childcare affect what he has to pay?

This ^.

Why should he have to pay additional for childcare to facilitate the mum earning more money?

Speaking as a bloke, I would probably find it hard if my partner earnt more money than me - i think the suggestion of splitting bills 66/33 as an example is a good one. That may free up more money for him as disposable and then be more willing to save for/spend on nights out etc..... end result is still the same but its how its shared thats the important part.

baby_lemonade

Andrew_Ryan_89 wrote: »

Combine your total income, minus all your expenses and split the difference.

I think she needs to decide whether this man is just her boyfriend OR her partner/husband.

The fact that he has a nursery-school age child by the ex wife suggests to me that the split from the ex was relatively recent (?), so possibly she's thinking the guy's seeing her as a bit of a cash-cow.

If this man is her partner she's going to have to suck it up and accept that he's going to have less money, due to the childcare and maintenance he has to pay.