How to get over buyer's remorse?

needhouseadvice

hazyjo wrote: »

I think a lot of it is craving familiarity and a bit of homesickness thrown in.


I'm thinking of moving but I can feel the anxiety creeping in already. I've done it 7 times so really should be used to it, but we love our current house so much and it's going to be extremely hard leaving it. I feel I want to cry at the thought lol - not really been so emotionally attached to a house before. It's been a very happy home. We shall miss it terribly! I know when we move we'll probably wonder if we've done the right thing - but it's all about the area with us. I want to lose most or all of the mortgage, and live by the sea. We certainly won't get either of those if we stay.


Jx

That's my long-term plan. Earn enough equity on a London flat so I can buy outright and live by the sea when I'm older.

Yes, feeling very homesick right now!

needhouseadvice

marksoton wrote: »

You are where you are.

Did the fact there's nothing going on not cross your mind when offering?

That's the thing - before I completed I thought the location was the best bit about the flat. It's in a safe neighbourhood. No worries about walking home alone at night as a girl. Near a park. Up and coming as there are big plans for regeneration so in a few years it will look very different. I think it's a good investment. I wasn't even thinking that I wanted to be close to lots of things but now that I'm not, I miss it.

marksoton

needhouseadvice wrote: »

That's the thing - before I completed I thought the location was the best bit about the flat. It's in a safe neighbourhood. No worries about walking home alone at night as a girl. Near a park. Up and coming as there are big plans for regeneration so in a few years it will look very different. I think it's a good investment. I wasn't even thinking that I wanted to be close to lots of things but now that I'm not, I miss it.

So get on the tube/bus/overground.

It may be an inconvenience but it sounds like you just need to snap out of it and make a bit of effort.

needhouseadvice

marksoton wrote: »

So get on the tube/bus/overground.

It may be an inconvenience but it sounds like you just need to snap out of it and make a bit of effort.

It's actually only a 15/20 min walk to more happening areas. I do need to get over myself!

kelpie35

If you feel there is so much to do to make it a home, use your spare time making these changes, and you will not have too much time to think about what you could be doing if you hadn't moved.

shortcrust

I've always had down times in new homes - it takes me six months to feel at home again. It's natural. I always grieve for the home I've lost, even if it was rubbish and I couldn't wait to get out of it. Just give it time.:)

PlaysNicely

:wave:

Congratulations for getting on the ladder, especially in London!

Agree with all aspects of what's been said, but would also add ... can you create a corner in your new flat that you're happy with. This could be for comfort, easy living or to explore something new, but do something to make yourself feel 'at home'. Perhaps think of one of the things you were looking forward to most about having your own flat, such as experimental cooking & having friends round - and create a space dedicated to that (especially if there's not much going on locally but you do have friends nearby).

I did this once in a house we'd bought because it was the only thing we could afford even though it was falling to bits and we had two tiny children. We created a cheap and cheerful, colourful 'library' corner with bean bags, throws and book shelves, which was our sanctuary from the more grotty bits of the house (and a safe place for the kids to play). We improved the house around this and came to love the house in the end.

Starting to think of it as home will help it to become one for you. PN x

bitsandpieces

needhouseadvice wrote: »

It's actually only a 15/20 min walk to more happening areas. I do need to get over myself!

Get a bike, if you're able to cycle. More happening areas will just be 5mins away, then - even on a cheap/heavy bike that's unattractive to thieves.

rach_k

Don't forget that it often takes a while to really get to know an area - I've been where I am now for over 4 years and I'm still discovering nice little places and fun things to do. It's probably a bit different for me as I'm talking kid-friendly places, quirky shops and nice places to go for a walk, but I'm sure the same applies with things for younger people (actually I'm not that old but I feel very old now!).

Find a local Facebook group, try and work out what is happening locally (there must be something!) and start building yourself a little network, even if that's just getting to know the people next door, the local hairdresser and smiling at the guy in the corner shop. It's hard moving to a new area - you're dealing with living alone, the responsibility of your own place AND not knowing people near you but it won't be new to you for very long.

[Deleted User]

I know exactly how you feel OP.

I bought in London and had to buy based on my budget.

I ended up with a 3 bed ( well 2 bed and a box room ) new build terrace in East Finchley.

When I got the keys I sat in there and cried, I hated it, the rooms were odd rectangles with awful windows and it was totally horrible.

Anyway I had to get over this and realise it was a stepping stone and not forever.

So I decorated, bought my own things in and put my own stamp on it and 6mths later felt totally different about it.

It also realised a nice profit the next time I moved to something I really loved so it served its purpose.