is the only way up?

toile

hi all
hope you don't mind me posting this, but i feel so alone with my debt problem. Basically i owe a lot of money to just one creditor, a job i was banking on has fallen through, so i am heading for debt crisis.
My OH knows nothing about this, and i have not told another sole. I have tried so hard to tell my OH but i know this will,destry him. He works so hard and is always worn out. Being so stupid and thinking i was helping has put me in this position, just trying to make ends meet, not being frivolous,no holidays.go out very,very,rarely. I know i will have to look for another job asap. i just feel so ground down by this.

sorry to be so miserable, but sometimes its all too much.

toile

In_Search_Of_Me

You are NOT alone in this as we too are in debt. Just look how many people are struggling around you! I think you should chat to your OH about things - for better for worse after all! It's hard but he des have a right to know and you'll feel much better not being dishonest with him. Can you post your SOA? Are you working at the moment? If not could you do agency work until a f/t job comes along? Just wanted to send a hug for you and to say you're not alone but I do understand that it feels like it sometimes!

toile

thank you for the hug.

I am in work at the moment but the contract ends soon. I will not be able to meet the repayments by november unless i get work. I do realise that a lot of people are in the same position,but in my family,work,social life i just feel so isolated.
toile

katierose

:hello: Hi Toile welcome to the forum you are not alone anymore,

If you have a look at southerscousers first time posters thread at the top of the first page it help you with your statement of affairs,this will help everyone give you some great advice.

toile

thankyou katierose

basically my income in november will be £280.00 per month and my loan re-payments are £320.00

i will find another job, i have to,

toile

mum2one

Hi.
At one time or another we are all in the financial mess, I know where your coming from, 5 yrs ago I went from £1,000 pm take home to £250 pm ( sick pay and then maternity pay), I was in a mess, at the time I judt buried my head, I did not know about sites like this, (owed £10k)5 years later, I still owe £3k on cards, but Ive struggled, been to rock bottom so many times I did not think I was going to get up, but I did it with support from family and some very good friends with wide shoulders.

It may not seem like it, but there is light at the end of the rainbow, it may be a flicker, may take some finding but ur doing.

as for OH, if you cant face telling him, write it in a letter, its not a cop out, but your get more done that way, you need to explain why, how etc, you may argue, you may shout, but together your face it. Always suggest trying the CAB for independant advice, as they can put you in touch with a debt counciller.
Just take one day at a time.
Think of this forum as friends that you havent met yet. x

Sea78

HI

you're not alone now. You're part of this wonderful DFW community. We will help you and cheer you on all we can. IS there anything you can do before then to increase your chances of getting a job, or at least put enough aside to pay your repayments? Is there anything you can ebay to raise the cash?

Sea xxx

toile

Thanks sea78

I really don't have anything to e-bay, we have lived hand to mouth for years so havn'y got anything we can do without.

but thank you for your post

toile

Sea78

OK - worth the suggestion though. Go on the freebies board and also sign up for EVERYTHING.
I have also sold tesco vouchers online for quite a bit so perhaps you could tr that as well as all the usual freebies goodies. Expecting a baby? ok, maybe not, but you get vouchers. I was actually expecting but lost the baby but am still receiving all the stuff. I really wish I wasn't.

poptart1_2

:j I was in exactly the same position as you about 5 weeks ago, if you look back at my earlier posts you will see what I mean , I owed to 8 creditors though and was terrified, I could not tell my oh and ended up at the doctors on sleeping tablets and pills just to get through the day. in the end I had to tell oh and get help from a debt crisis company, Oh been superb , very understanding , he was just relieved i had told him as hed been very worried as i had lost 2 stone in weight and was crying all the time, I went on a DMP , I did not go to a free one as I wanted things to get going fast (which they have) all my creditors have accepted their proposal and things are getting better already, I am trying to come off the medication .The dmp have been fantastic , I could not fault them so far.I have not had many phone calls from creditors or letters .Things will get better hun, but telling your oh is the best way forward, for me it was the hardest part but after that its all fell into place, please get help so you can continue living a stress free life, your health is more important than to carry this burden. thousands of people are in the same position as you and me,please take care , pm me if you want. I know how you feel,love xxxx

tealady

Hello Toile, welcome to a wonderful friendly group. Please don't apologise for being miserable, we are all entitled to that!! Having been in debt I know how much it can drag people down. As Katierose said put up your SOA and we will see what we can do. If you look at the start of other peoles threads you can see how much wonderful advice there is out there

Sea I am so sorry to hear about your baby, I cannot imagine how you feel but I hope all around you are being as supportive as they can. Big hugs.