Gitdog’s Guide to the Annual Vet Visit.

elsien

You like the vet’s reception area. You call in regularly for a belly rub and a treat from the nurses.So being in the waiting room is a doddle. You have your settle mat, you have practiced your best angelic expression and you are milking it for all you are worth. So exceptional and virtuous is your behaviour that another owner asks mum if she is a dog trainer. Somewhat strangely, this appears to produce odd choking noises from her direction.

The minor blip when someone chooses to put the caged rabbit on the floor under your nose is not your fault. After all the rabbit did escape unscathed. Although the same can’t necessarily be said for the cage.

Next, into the treatment room looking slightly worried. You have been to training classes. Mum has spent hours teaching you to open your mouth on command and to be handled by strangers. You demonstrate this by clamping your teeth firmly shut and keeping them clamped. You are a bull terrier, prising them open just isn’t going to happen. Oh look, a treat. Go on then, have a quick peek if you must.

What’s that the vet is holding? Peer suspiciously from behind the chair as you are fairly sure you encountered said pointy objects this time last year. Allow yourself to be coaxed out for a fuss before diving back into the corner. The vet says she doesn’t want to corner you. Fine by you, you like corners, you’re staying put. Bide your time until the door opens to let the reinforcements in then make your bid for freedom.
!!!!!!, that didn’t work. You are so busy looking confused you fail to notice the needle in the scruff of the neck. You somewhat bemusedly wonder why more treats are on offer, but never one to miss an opportunity you swallow one whole then snaffle the extra one that is still sticking out of the pocket.

Kennel cough you say? The one that goes up the nose? It is rather impolite of the vet to comment on why it’s proving so hard to get the dose up such a large hooter. You take umbrage and wriggle away demonstrating that your wriggling skills are equivalent to a large and boisterous greased eel with additional sound effects. This leaves mum no choice but to sit on the floor and do the full bear hug routine with her arms and legs. Thus giving the opportunity to throw your head up and crack her on the nose. Unfortunately while your head is lifted your schnozzle is exposed and the dastardly deed is done leaving you and mum both completely exhausted.

Clearly this is all mum’s fault so you have no choice but to glue yourself to the legs of that very very nice vet lady who keeps feeding you treats, and to give death glares to mum, declining to go anywhere near her from this point on. This tries mum’s patience to its limits. Time to put on your best Oscar winning traumatised performance on being dragged back into the waiting room where curious onlookers are wondering what on earth was being done to both you and mum behind the privacy of a closed door. Look incredibly smug while you get sympathy and she doesn’t.
The only question remaining is, can your ensuing sulk last a whole year until the next time round?

mellymoo74

Poor gitdog
You are so mean to him Elsien you should be ashamed

elsien

I couldn't believe it when he velcroed himself to the vet and wouldn't come back to me. Litlle !!!!.
Left me no choice other than to remind him that I'd never wanted him in the first place. * strops off to outsulk Gitdog.*

Although what eejit thinks it's a good idea to stick a rabbit right under the nose of an unknown dog? Rabbit was none too impressed either.

mellymoo74

Same type that say
'Oh he's just being friendly' when their slavering teeth bearing dog bounds over.

You love him really think how bored you'd be if you weren't constantly replacing things he has
A eaten
B chewed
C buried
D knocked over

DigForVictory

Have I mentioned how much I love reading Gitdog's antics, if only because he makes three teenage boys seem Reasonable?

He's worth his weight in rubies to other folks. Publish!

UKTigerlily

That is hilarious, poor poor Gitdog! I saw the title & felt happier than when my Your Cat mag came today! I love to read about the abuse that poor boy suffers x

elsien

Never mind poor Gitdog, I'm the one who had to roll around the vet surgery floor wrestling him and ending up with a nearly broken nose for my troubles!

Gingernutty

elsien wrote: »

Never mind poor Gitdog, I'm the one who had to roll around the vet surgery floor wrestling him and ending up with a nearly broken nose for my troubles!

How's that holiday working out for you? :rotfl:

candygirl

Aww he looks like a virtual angel :A

Pollycat

Poor much-maligned Gitdog.

You really should consider writing a book, Elsien.
You remind me very much of Deric Longden who wrote about his various cats as well as his Mum (flimed as Lost for Words with Thora Hird and Pete Postlethwaite).

elsien

Gingernutty wrote: »

How's that holiday working out for you? :rotfl:

Gitdog free.