Gravestone costs

ThemeOne

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

Maybe if I re-word the question: is the OP the only one who will contribute to these costs?

If there were other surviving family members I'd certainly ask them if they wanted to contribute, but of course we don't know who else is in the plot, and who survives, and what the relationships are like.

I'm working on the principle that only I will contribute, since I'm the only one who inherits anything, plus my relationship with most other survivors isn't that close.

Probate was issued about two weeks ago.

Yorkshireman99

ThemeOne wrote: »

I'm working on the principle that only I will contribute, since I'm the only one who inherits anything, plus my relationship with most other survivors isn't that close.

Probate was issued about two weeks ago.

It is important that you do what you want to do not what others may think is right. Sadly the bereaved often feel pressured to spend too much money.

gettingtheresometime

They inscribe on the back of headstones in Arlington Cemetary

getmore4less

https://www.gov.uk/valuing-estate-of-someone-who-died/valuing-debts-and-liabilities

Funeral expenses

You can deduct expenses to cover the funeral and things like:
flowers
refreshments for mourners
expenses you paid to arrange the funeral
a headstone to mark the grave


HMRC manual
https://www.gov.uk/hmrc-internal-manuals/inheritance-tax-manual/ihtm10373

IHT400 help notes
https://www.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/372033/iht206_1.pdf

note 81 page 51
81 Funeral expenses
You may deduct funeral costs and reasonable mourning expenses. You may
also deduct the cost of a headstone or tombstone marking the site of the
deceased’s grave.
These expenses may also include a reasonable amount to cover the cost of:
• flowers
• refreshments provided for the mourners after the service
• necessary expenses incurred by the executor or administrator in
arranging the funeral
Use the space provided to give details of other costs that are
being deducted.

ThemeOne

Yorkshireman99 wrote: »

It is important that you do what you want to do not what others may think is right. Sadly the bereaved often feel pressured to spend too much money.

Indeed, and my reason for opening this thread was to find ways of lessening this cost while still providing a respectful memorial.

I'm not too worried what other surviving family may think as once it's all complete I doubt the grave will be frequently, if ever, visited.

On another note, I had already included an estimate of headstone costs in my Inheritance Tax return.

vfm

We had a similar problem. We are the only ones that go to the cemetery. As the original gravestone was marble, we managed to get a similar colour square flower pot off the internet (ebay) which the company includes limited inscription of your choice and the cost was only approx. £25. We were really happy with it and it looks really nice. The money that has been saved by not getting a new expensive stone is going to different charities.

ThemeOne

vfm wrote: »

We had a similar problem. We are the only ones that go to the cemetery. As the original gravestone was marble, we managed to get a similar colour square flower pot off the internet (ebay) which the company includes limited inscription of your choice and the cost was only approx. £25. We were really happy with it and it looks really nice. The money that has been saved by not getting a new expensive stone is going to different charities.

Now that is definitely food for thought, thank you.

Although he wasn't online, my father delighted in saving money whenever he could - to a ridiculous degree actually in my opinion - and would probably already be horrified how much was spent on his funeral, so I feel some cost consciousness over the memorial would definitely be in keeping with his wishes!

thecoffeehouse204

ThemeOne wrote: »

Now that is definitely food for thought, thank you.

Although he wasn't online, my father delighted in saving money whenever he could - to a ridiculous degree actually in my opinion - and would probably already be horrified how much was spent on his funeral, so I feel some cost consciousness over the memorial would definitely be in keeping with his wishes!

Your dad sounds similar to mine, we did very similar in burying his ashes in the family grave. The current headstone was full and my mum said he would be horrified at the cost of a new one, he delighted in saving as much money as possible. So we eventually purchased one of these with the inscription "In loving memory of NAME - DATES, Husband, Father, Grandfather, Always in our hearts". It sits on the plinth of the current headstone and is still looking good 3 years later.
I was originally dissapointed that he was not going to be remembered on the headstone but think this is a good compromise and definately what dad would have wanted.

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Memorial-Pot-Grave-DAD-GRANDAD-Black-Silver-Writing-Lid-Doves-Personalised-/361677206419?hash=item5435a43393:g:i9sAAOSwt7ZXpNxi

ThemeOne

Thank you for the ebay link - I will take a good look through the similar items.

You say the one you got "sits" on the plinth. Is it fixed on in some way? Or is it very heavy? I'm just wondering if there's a risk of theft otherwise.

thecoffeehouse204

ThemeOne wrote: »

Thank you for the ebay link - I will take a good look through the similar items.

You say the one you got "sits" on the plinth. Is it fixed on in some way? Or is it very heavy? I'm just wondering if there's a risk of theft otherwise.

The one we got has a weighted base so it won't blow about, did originally think of maybe using some no nails to attach it to the stone but so far in three years we've never had any problems with it going astray and the cemetery isn't in the nicest of areas.