Crazy Cat Lady Chapter 2 - Groundhog Day

Bobarella

No Im glad I asked if anything. I do remember you saying about that incident. It sounds like its really left a huge mark on you.
I have also had that awful cringe worthy experience with family where you cant quite believe anyone could say that. Its very difficult. Racist remarks in the ear shot of children for example.....

Its horrible to feel so down on yourself. Im sorry. Flip it on its head. Maybe you are bigger than you'd like right now. But who went out to work and kept the family going for 6 months. Who kept 2 children on the straight and narrow. Who helped countless kids get their GCSEs, kept your husband going AND has really lovely friends by the sounds of it. Now that extra bit of weight? You can get rid of it because you are a super cool, highly motivated, amazing lady!

takingcontrolatlast

Hi CCL,

You made me laugh when you said you were bored in the London Eye :rotfl:

I'm glad you all had a nice time though and I'm not surprised you are tired ...sometimes a holiday is required to get over a holiday

Ditto to Bobarella's post

AS for the big birthday... it's just a number... I thought 30 was bad and 40 was wonderful - you will be in your prime!!

crazy_cat_lady

Aw bless you Bob - brought a tear to my eye. I don't take a compliment very well at the best of times. It's so difficult to explain to people that I really can't help the way that I see myself. It takes real effort for me to be more positive about me and therefore it's too much effort sometimes. I know that I'm a strong woman and that I won't give up - I just have this constant need for approval from everyone. Not that it should be important.
So, I haven't decided what kind of a mood I'm in today. Got a good night's sleep and should be fine. Also don't have masses of stuff planned other than tutoring. Hoping to bag a nsd if I can, and get loads of crochet done...

Bobarella

Well I for one am always so impressed by all you do. I really hope your CBT? Will help you in seeing yourself the way others no doubt do.

juliejim

Morning CCL

Sounds like you had a great time in London.

Hope you're feeling better in yourself and today is a good day.

Hugs

Jue

crazy_cat_lady

Afternoon all :hello:
Well, it's been a CCL-like couple of days... never quite what I expect.
Got home from tutoring yesterday and promptly fell asleep on the sofa for 3(!) hours. You'd think that would be me up all night, but no - went to bed at 11 and slept right through till 8 this morning - obviously much needed. Yesterday I didn't do anything much other than crochet but today I got up and felt like doing stuff.
So, I did a quick PAD, the dishes, hoovered, washing, sorted a couple of dumping grounds I've been neglecting, and I even washed the window sills. As well as that I also did a bit of cooking that I didn't get round to yesterday, and stocked up the freezer with golden food that the rest of my family seem to enjoy so much.
DH isn't doing too well today unfortunately - he told me just before work that his confidence is all gone. I feel for him, and I know that's what I'm feeling on a day to day basis as well. But life goes on, and he's made it to work, so that's good at least. Hopefully he'll be feeling a bit better when he gets home later.
I've also swallowed a massive frog this afternoon and phoned a mortgage broker. I'm not overly confident about getting a remortgage but I would love to be on a lower rate than we currently are (4.78% trapped with NRAM) - I suspect our finances are not in a good enough position yet but it has to be worth an ask. What I'd like to do ideally is to continue paying what we do now, but over a shorter term. I don't know if that's even possible though. I've sent the man a couple of copies of my latest credit report and he's going to call me back.
Other than that I've been out for my physio appointment - thankfully those are getting fewer and further between. I really need to lose some weight for the sake of my poor knees but the exercises are helping a lot.
Only other stuff left to do tonight is to put dinner together (it's all prepped and ready to go), freeze some of my batch cooking and catch up with the kitties as it's time they were flea and worm treated. And hopefully lots more crochet.

Squiggly_Diddly

Hi CCL, been having a read of your diary and so just wanted to say it sounds like you're doing really well, lots of things to deal with so sometimes things just have to be 'let go' for a while. I desperately need to shift some weight too, and about to start uni to retrain as a primary teacher.
Well done on speaking to the broker, it's good to know where you stand - even if it's not necessarily the answer you want to hear that you end up with. Just readjust the focus and carry on ��

crazy_cat_lady

DH came in from work and ate the food I cooked for him, then went to bed. I am very worried about him but trying not to stress him out any further. I made sure he had his 5 a day in the 1 meal and he has done the right thing in that he's not getting drunk or staying up all night stressing. I have remembered we are approaching the anniversary of his mam's death (on Wednesday) so expect that's hanging around him whether he realises it or not. I wish I could make things better for him though. I haven't decided whether it's for the best if ds goes in and sleeps in with him (because he wants to be with his dad) or if I should. As usual I am overthinking everything.
Like I am overthinking about why this mortgage bloke didn't call back. Thinking that my credit report is too scary to even contemplate a remortgage.
Blimming brain. High time I got back on with watching the gymnastics and doing a bit of crochet.

crazy_cat_lady

Feeling rough this morning. The sleeping decision was taken away from me as when I went up there ds was fast asleep in my bed with dh. He's a bit heavy to move so I left him and slept on the sofa. Whilst it's ok for naps it's not great for long and restful sleep and I was awake for a few times during the night before giving up and getting up at 8. It's no big deal though as I have no real plans for the day ahead, although ds is already nagging me for £land challenge, which I just can't be bothered with. I may need to nap. I realise dh is unwell again but he seems to have gotten all of the sleep that I've lost along the way - I'm a tad jealous.
I wonder what will happen today - I don't like days when there are no plans...

Bobarella

Doesnt sound good Cat. Is DH still getting any support from the doctors?