Finding lost family, maybe, or more likely an infant death

Brighty

Hi all

Back in 2012, both my parents passed away.

My dad was the youngest of 3 brothers, both elder brothers already deceased. There's no one else left of that side of the family.

Spent all my life being told and thinking there was just the 3 brothers, all the old family photos show just the 3 boys.

When looking through my parents box of paperwork, i stumbled across a strange find, a birth certificate for a girl, born to my dads parents, a few years before their eldest boy. No death certificate.

Most confusing and intriguing.

Was it a still birth or death soon after birth? Then why would there be a birth certificate dated a month after the birth, but no death certificate with it?

Adopted for some reason? Surely if my parents knew she existed, it would have been mentioned at some point in my life?

I think it will probably be that she died, but it's intriguing to think there could be a whole other branch of family out there somewhere

So, where do you think i should start with trying to find out if there was a death or adoption or something else that would explain the apparent disappearance of my dads eldest sister?

Brighty

PasturesNew

You can go through deaths registered on the family tree sites - a free search will show you if there's potential. A free trial can get you more information. Then, once you think you've found one, you apply for a copy of the death certificate (~£10) and take it from there. What you do next depends on what it says.

If adopted, it's not up to you to be able to trace somebody. It's their right and not yours (I believe). I think the child is allowed to go looking for the parent, but not the parent going to the child. And you're not even the parent.

So, if adopted, you're left with one option: Put notices online on the "lost/looking for" sites giving the information that you know, from the birth certificate. That's what they'd have in their hand and they'd be looking for the person named on that. You can expect a 1-5 year wait before anybody relevant ever spots it.

kathrynha

I would start looking at death certificates for the area from the date of birth to see if there is anything. If there is, then you have an answer. If not, then you need to look further, but it could be difficult as not all adoptions were formal back then, and her surname will definitely of changed, as well as possibly her first name.

Tammykitty

If you have the date of birth you should be able to order the death certificate if there is one on gov.uk

pigpen

if she was adopted and wanted to know family she would have contacted you all already.. by all means look for a death certificate, otherwise leave her be..

candlelight_2013

If it was a still birth the baby wouldn't have been given a name in those days, and the certificates were a bit like tissue paper.

If it was a birth and death, the birth certificate would have been free but they would have to pay for a death certificate. Perhaps they didn't want one, or perhaps they couldn't afford one. They would have been given a form for the funeral director, so wouldn't have needed a death certificatee for that purpose.

HTH

Candlelightx

kathrynha

pigpen wrote: »

if she was adopted and wanted to know family she would have contacted you all already.. by all means look for a death certificate, otherwise leave her be..

This is the oldest of four siblings, the younger three of which have already passed away, so one can assume she will have done too.
Also it is possible to investigate old adoptions, without actually contacting the adoptive family.

pigpen

kathrynha wrote: »

This is the oldest of four siblings, the younger three of which have already passed away, so one can assume she will have done too... I managed to make that connection (I know I'm dippy and all ) that was the reason I suggested checking death records. Without knowing the birth year you can't really say she has died, the others might have died young from illness or accident. I'm the second of 2 children my parents had, my sister died in 1973!
Also it is possible to investigate old adoptions, without actually contacting the adoptive family.

and if she had any interest in birth family she would have found them.. respect for her choices assuming of course she ever knew she was adopted.. many babies were passed to other (older) family members to raise if the parents were unmarried or young and noone ever mentioned it again.. so she could have been raised as the OPs dads cousin or a young aunt & no formal adoption made.. it could easily happen she was known to everyone all along... which would be interesting to know.

Grumpelstiltskin

Brighty You don't say which country the child was born in. England or Wales very easy to look up, Scotland or Ireland are different.


Come back and confirm which country and we can give you the correct advice.

Kynthia

We're both parents named on the birth certificate and we're tgry married when she was born? If so then unlikely she was adopted, although not impossible, and she probably passed away. I had an uncle that passed before my dad and the rest of his siblings were even born. Any number of childhood illnesses or cot death could be the cause.

clairec79

it wasn't a stillbirth because the certificates are/were different

my dad's elder sister (born before his parents were married) was adopted out, I found out of her existance when doing my family tree and ordered the certificate and in the margin the word 'adopted' was written (this was in the 1920s)

I did manage to track her down and she had died, quite willing to have a go for you if you want to pm me