Elite 11+ shopping and chat thread

louised

locarr wrote: »

I'm sorry to hear you are struggling, he gives you almost £400 a month, nearly 5 grand a year, a fair amount, I would say, he needs to live too...


does he take the kids out? have them over the w/e?

So he has nothing to do with the kids, never sees them, never takes them out. I have a mortagae to pay, this doesn't even cover the mortagage. He has no mortagage and he has his new partners wage, the two of them have 4 times each month what I have with my 3 children, please don't worry about him !

two_yellow_roses

louised wrote: »

I am a Nurse, I work 31 hours a week and earn around £10,000 a year

In the UK ? Isnt that below minimum wage ?

louised

Enterprise_1701C wrote: »

What happens about your housing costs? That amount per child is plenty to feed and clothe them.

£33 a per child per week is to cover everything, not just feed and clothe them, I have a mortgage to pay, this does not even cover the mortgage.

LEJC

louised wrote: »

So he has nothing to do with the kids, never sees them, never takes them out. I have a mortagae to pay, this doesn't even cover the mortagage. He has no mortagage and he has his new partners wage, the two of them have 4 times each month what I have with my 3 children, please don't worry about him !

I can sense the frustration in your post...but sometimes it's best to focus on yourself and what you have without making comparisons to what others have....it just leads to bitterness.

It's taken me quite a long time to realise that whilst I sometimes get upset and angry at others for having something I want...it's not about what I don't have ....in the scheme of things it's about what I do have....I'm sorry if thats too cryptic...and I have not explained it well but life isn't about looking back on what you could have had....its about making the most of the love you have in the here and now.

Enterprise_1701C

Donna_Wallis wrote: »

In the UK ? Isnt that below minimum wage ?

That is very true, something is not quite right here, if she is a nurse she should be getting pro-rata a minimum of £17 -18k.

louised

Enterprise_1701C wrote: »

That is very true, something is not quite right here, if she is a nurse she should be getting pro-rata a minimum of £17 -18k.

I am a school nurse in a private school, I have a zero hours contract and some of the hourly rates are on call and sleeping duty, which is less than day rate, I am a registered nurse, I took the job I have because it fits in with getting my 3 children to and from school and everything else I need to do fro them, my kids will always be my priority.

bubbs

Afternoon all, quiet here today, I'm just sitting waiting for hubby and it's glorious sunshine and quite warm on me:D

Enterprise_1701C

I have a friend that has just gone back to work as a nurse, she has a baby and a school age child, she works one night a week and all day Sunday, the higher rate hours.I think she earns £1100 a month. Could you do something like that louised? Do you have parents nearby that could help with childcare, or friends? Just that your current job sounds like a lot of hours for little pay, if things are that tight then it might be worth reassessing your own work life rather than being bitter towards your ex. I can't help but wonder that if you rock the boat with him he might bring into the equation the fact that he never sees his kids, whether that is his choice or yours we do not know.

LEJC

louised wrote: »

I am a school nurse in a private school, I have a zero hours contract and some of the hourly rates are on call and sleeping duty, which is less than day rate, I am a registered nurse, I took the job I have because it fits in with getting my 3 children to and from school and everything else I need to do fro them, my kids will always be my priority.

You know what...good on you for finding something that fits around the children work wise...ok so its not the greatest pay but it keeps your hand in the profession that you clearly trained in and gives you the chance to have school holidays off too...maybe even after they leave school or become more self sufficient in looking after themselves you could return to nursing on a more permanent basis.

The fact that your ex doesnt see his children....thats his problem and one he will always have to deal with...but you shouldn't confuse his lack of wanting to see them with what he should or shouldnt be paying towards their keep...the fact is he does contribute presumably to the level of his earnings...
Again his new partners income is nothing to do with it...other than its an issue that clearly rattles you.

3 lovely children...thats what you have....and my guess is that whilst your ex may try to deny they exist by not seeing them...he's missed out on seeing them grow up...you have that priceless advantage there.

Enterprise_1701C

Just thought, fair warning for any Virgin users out there. Had an email from "Virgin" this morning saying our payment had not gone through. It is very realistic and would be easy to fall for, have not fully checked it out yet but fairly sure it is a phishing email, and absolutely certain the payment went through.

There is a clickable link on it so please be careful